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  #1  
Old 09-05-04, 08:40 AM
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Unhappy Family Wants to Understand adult ADD but can not handle it...WHY?

I finally asked My sis to pick up a book and read at my condtion so maybe she will understad me better and she didn't argue with me. Maybe part of her wants to understand. Who knows? All she seams to see is that I am not a mentally well person...but she does not know what makes me tic.

I would rather her read a book cause If I try to explain my symptoms ......it's toooo overwhelming for her to hear it seems and tells me to stop talking about it...I would have better luck getting my Dog to understand me.

She has her cushy life with her work and friends and not exposed to learning about disorders and I dont think she wants to cause she just might find out things about her...

I have No Idea,...this is specualtion...but Good Grief... What is her Problem?
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Old 09-05-04, 11:29 AM
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Shadow Syndromes by Ratey & Johnson is an interesting book. It looks at various disorders and how they can play a role in even 'normal' people & talks about how meds can help. The idea sounds scary (OMG I'm nuts just like the crazy people) but it's handled in a way that I think could be pretty easily accepted by most folks & help them see how these disorders feel and like in their lives in a mild form & understand that it's not just for people seeing hallucinations in mental hospitals.
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Old 09-05-04, 11:41 AM
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I am ready to throw a lot of books at her...No Pun intended..if she doesn't wanna hear it from me she can hear it from the Pro's.
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Old 09-05-04, 11:53 AM
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really big {{hugs}} Mel.......

I think it's the worse thing any family can do, be it mental or physical is to be ignorant about it......

I hope you get through to your sister......
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Old 09-05-04, 11:55 AM
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I hope so too, Hugsss Paula!
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Old 09-05-04, 12:01 PM
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Draga,
I notice my family all want to ignore any possibility of any mental illness.
My gut feeling is that they hope none of it rubs off the genetic tree onto them.

Addictions are talked about in my family the same way, kind of around the issues "yeah we all have the tendency to be addictive type personalities", but no one really wants to get involved in anyone’s struggle or have it rub off on them or theirs.

I'm just thinking out loud here.

It's not that the ‘normies’ don't care it's that they are afraid, that's my take on it anyway.
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Old 09-05-04, 12:04 PM
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I am starting to agree with ya there, Charlie...Hugs
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Old 09-05-04, 01:53 PM
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I invited my sister to talk to my doc when I had gotten my dx. She didn't believe me when I told her I have ts+adhd. "Ok, but you can't have severe ts or adhd." was her reply. She talked almost 40 minutes with my doc about what is ocd and what ts is and what is severe and mild symptoms... My sister almost cried after that and said she was soooooo sorry for hating me all these years, she just thought I was a bully and liked saying bad stuff, playing a clown and doing those crazy things.

Maybe talking to your doc could help your sister too?
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Old 09-05-04, 05:07 PM
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i'm still on a non-speaking level with(out?) my mom (haven't seen or spoken to her since mid-march, but i'm "okay" with that...), but i brought my friends to my doctor, so she/they could meet...
i think doing so was one of the most brilliant ideas i've ever had (and i've been known to have a few good ones, and a whole heap of really *bad* ones, too;-), because they got to ask whatever questions they wanted to ask, and my doctor and i tried to answer those questions, and also my doctor got to ask my friends questions...

suddenly, the whole idea of "psychiatry", "shrink" and so on, didn't seem so "scary" to my friends (these words are all part of the major "three monkeys" attitude towards people who are - in this particular example - *(neuro)psychiatrically* "different) and they've learned *a lot*, as have *i*!

i actually think the relationship(s) i have with/(?) my friends has/have *improved* since they met and talked to my doctor...
"the lines of communication are open", kinda...

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Old 09-05-04, 05:08 PM
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That's an idea if she goes for it..cross fingers and legs...I need all help I can get Thanks Hun.
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Please do not think me cold, for I do want loving arms to hold, but I am so sick of being used and abused...If I die alone tomorrow I die unbruised.
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Old 09-05-04, 05:16 PM
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Both of Ya's
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Please do not think me cold, for I do want loving arms to hold, but I am so sick of being used and abused...If I die alone tomorrow I die unbruised.
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Old 09-05-04, 07:20 PM
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What is it about even the most difficult members of our family, we want (need) them to understand us? Some family members I can already predict don't want to hear about it. They like their own version of reality.

My mother-in-law doesn't understand. She thinks I have "issues" and doesn't see the chemistry problem. She wants medication to work instantly (as far as bipolar goes), and is skeptical about ADD.

Next time Mike talks to her (we see my therapist on Thursday) he's going to see about sending her some info about bipolar. I copied some stuff from about.com. It might help her understand what I've been struggling with all these years. She worries constantly, she doesn't know that it hurts worse from the inside.

When you think about it, it may confuse or annoy them, but it can be downright painful for us! With the physically ill there seems to be endless amounts of care and support. When it comes to the "mentally ill" people become so easily frustrated when it's not "cured yet". They find it "convenient" for us, to just blame it when something isn't going right.

Aw heck, I went and ranted instead of being helpful. So sorry. Hope your sister is cooperative. Hope it comforts you.
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Old 09-05-04, 11:28 PM
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No No......It nice to know I am not alone and if it helps to get it out of ya system shug rant away
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Old 09-05-04, 11:47 PM
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LOL! that's good Eye!
"Aw heck, I went and ranted instead of being helpful. So sorry. Hope your sister is cooperative. Hope it comforts you"
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Old 09-05-04, 11:49 PM
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hehe if someone can relate...so much de betta Im sure too many of us can relate.sigh
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