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  #1  
Old 06-28-09, 06:24 PM
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ADD and Anger

Hello ADD'ers and Non-ADD'ers..
I'm new here...trying to find new coping strategies and learn from the real pro's.. those blessed with this gift called ADD.

I am a 34 year old man, having only within the last 2 years been diagnosed with ADD, but have been experiencing my symptoms since I was 7.

I'm quite certain I'll be responding to alot of threads with my own experience, and will do so with the love and respect that I hope to receive in return.

I've recently been told by several people very close to me that I have anger problems. I know anger can come in many different forms, and the anger that I expose to others is non-violent, but more verbal and/or passive. I don't do this on purpose, nor do I know the exact triggers yet. I have very recently started talking with a therapist (not the same one that writes my Adderall XR prescription), but still have doubts that it's anger.. as opposed to their sensitivity to my bluntness.

Regardless, I'm here to find others with ADD that have been told they have anger problems. I'd like to see if anger is relative to ADD, and what your triggers are.

Thanks so much.
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Old 06-28-09, 09:16 PM
pADDyjay pADDyjay is offline
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Re: ADD and Anger

welcome aboard...enjoy your stay
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Old 06-28-09, 09:19 PM
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Re: ADD and Anger

Quote:
Originally Posted by pADDyjay View Post
welcome aboard...enjoy your stay
Your not angry at all-put some effort in.......

I would but trying my best to restrain it or let it out in a creative format
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Old 06-29-09, 04:15 AM
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Re: ADD and Anger

That's interesting because I have a problem with NOT getting angry!
I forget or don't notice; think of a great thing to say 48 hours later; or when justifiably furious at someone, go completely speechless; or, no more than twice a year, become horribly and irrationally angry at someone close to me...
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Old 06-29-09, 08:48 AM
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Re: ADD and Anger

welcome
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Old 06-29-09, 09:03 AM
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Re: ADD and Anger

That is interesting, Stef. I was reading a book on the 5 different types of anger last night, and I seem to remember that method as being "cold anger". I use that at times, also. Thanks for that!
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Old 06-29-09, 09:14 AM
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Re: ADD and Anger

really? wow - I wouldn't say it's a "method" though, just my nature...
it takes quite a bit to get me angry. I guess I'm just busy thinking about other things!
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Old 06-29-09, 11:52 AM
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Re: ADD and Anger

Welcome!
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Old 06-29-09, 11:53 AM
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Re: ADD and Anger

Hello and welcome to the forums!
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Old 06-29-09, 12:02 PM
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Re: ADD and Anger

welcome Keviticus,
I too have been struggling with anger. I tend to get overly angry over things that are not that big of a deal. Last night I had a very bad outburst... almost hitting my mother! It was such intense anger I had to punch the wall before I felt better. This is definatly the worst I've ever felt, but I have struggled with anger and expressing myself without getting angry.
I wish I had some helpful tips, but I hope knowing your not the only one struggling with this helps a little ;-)
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Old 06-29-09, 12:29 PM
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Re: ADD and Anger

Kev,

Both my son (17) and husband have ADD. My son has frequent anger issues, but my husband does not. My son is hypersensitive and I would say that my husband can be completely insensitive or at least inattentive. Both are working with a therapist and it seems to be helping. My husband is trying to get in touch with his feelings and my son is trying to dial down some of the more intense reactions. Meds have also helped both of them - Vyvanse (son) Focalin (husband).

My son will respond to justice issues - kids not doing the right thing and get very anger at them for being irresponsible. He will respond to my "mom" requests very angerily at times. I think he feels "attacked" even when I try to ask as nice as possible. I have asked my other kids to check me on this and they confirm that he is extra sensitive to criticism or anything looking remotely like criticism.

I think simple suggestions get translated as "you suck" in his ADD mind sometimes. Sometimes, too many requests is just too much traffic in his brain and it makes him edgy. He can't process all of it.

I also think he may have a lower frustration tolerance than some. He seems to be getting better at that as he works thru more complicated situations, classes, etc. A teacher in his elementary years use to teach the kids the phase "stay in the struggle".

He can rage in his car at poor drivers. I think they either worry him or he just doesn't suffer fools very easily. I've told him how unfun it is to ride with him when he is too crabby in his car and he seems to get that.

On the positive side, my son is also very sensitive to other people's feelings. He is very intuitive. So, his sensitivity antenna works both ways. It's not all bad.

Also, my son is learning just to recognize and acknowledge his intense reactions. When necessary, he apologizes when he goes overboard and that goes a long way too.

Hope this helps.
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Old 06-29-09, 01:04 PM
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Re: ADD and Anger

How angry are you getting? Is your "bluntness" toward other people intended to be mean? Are you expecting to get a hurt response when interacting with people? If so, then you may want to seek help for dealing with this tendency. If it is unintended to be mean in nature, but just honesty, then you may be having a hard time with filtering your responses to people so that you are not hurting others' feelings. Someone correct me if I am wrong, but I believe that those who have Asperger's Syndrome (which can occur comorbidly with ADHD) deal extensively with this problem.
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