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Old 07-01-18, 03:12 PM
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Child gets embarrassing add award.

http://www.nydailynews.com/news/ny-n...630-story.html

I put this here because it involved a child. Despicable.
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Old 07-01-18, 04:05 PM
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Re: Child gets embarrassing add award.

I hate this. This upsets me.

And I'm okay that my opinion differs.

But COME ON! Is it not obvious that the teacher here was doing this out of fun? I mean I guess I can see how it's offensive...but can't imagine for a second it was intended to be so! The teacher was trying to have fun with her class!

Sounds to me like the mom might be a bit of a drama queen. Taking legal action!? haha.../grrrrrr! This is such a sue hungry country that it frustrates me.

Finding good teachers is tough. I think this teacher did what they did 100% out of love and kindness. They didn't mean for it to hurt anyone at all.

I don't know.
This story frustrates me. I think it's being waaaaaaay overblown.

Sorry if my opinions here have upset anyone.

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Old 07-01-18, 04:51 PM
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Re: Child gets embarrassing add award.

The mother and little boy can make an award for The Teacher Most Likely to Be Taught By a Lawsuit and he can present hang it up in the classroom for all the class to see.

All in fun, just like she did, of course. ;-)
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Old 07-01-18, 07:42 PM
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Re: Child gets embarrassing add award.

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Originally Posted by psychopathetic View Post
Is it not obvious that the teacher here was doing this out of fun?
No, it really isn't, at least not to me.

Maybe it was fun for the teacher to be a bully (which is sick, really), but clearly it wasn't fun for the child whose disability was used to make fun of him and highlight his weaknesses in front of his whole class.

It seems like a huge lapse in judgment and empathy on the teacher's part.

I don't know that making a lawsuit out of it is a great response. However, the teacher definitely needs to know that humiliating students isn't cool. A sincere apology -- if she's capable of seeing how she hurt the student -- and a bunch of remedial education about disabilities might be useful here, along with a reprimand.
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Old 07-01-18, 07:51 PM
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Re: Child gets embarrassing add award.

Hmmm sounds like the teacher needs to do some diversity training
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Old 07-01-18, 08:24 PM
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Re: Child gets embarrassing add award.

Yeah, but I don't think the teacher WAS being a bully. At all. Not even close. I could be wrong who knows...but the way I'm seeing things, is she did NOT do this out of spite or to be mean or to pick on the kid.
I genuinely feel it came from a place of love/silliness and that it's being blown way out of proportion.

I don't know...I get frustrated when people blow things out of proportion and make small issues into big major drama events that just don't need to exist.

I feel dang bad for the teacher here based on the tiny amount of info I've been given.

I'd like to know what other awards she gave out to the other students. I'd like to know more about the mother. And I'd like to know what the kid genuinely feels about it through his own voice...not through what the mother says he felt.
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Old 07-01-18, 09:27 PM
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Re: Child gets embarrassing add award.

I think it really depends on the kid and on the teacher and on their relationship with each other. The teacher may have intentionally been a bully, or it might have been an attempt at humor that backfired horribly.

There are a couple of teachers I know who have a sense of humor and teasing nature that works to establish rapport with kids who otherwise struggle. But it always makes me cringe a little but because when it’s a successful strategy it works really well, but when it backfires it’s horrendous.

I’d like to think that I could laugh about getting that award now, as an adult, provided that it was from someone who I know and respect. But as a teenager who was struggling with fitting in and failing miserably, it wouldn’t have mattered who it came from, and it probably would have just been more ammunition for my “peers”.
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Old 07-01-18, 09:30 PM
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Re: Child gets embarrassing add award.

Quote:
Originally Posted by psychopathetic View Post
Yeah, but I don't think the teacher WAS being a bully. At all. Not even close. I could be wrong who knows...but the way I'm seeing things, is she did NOT do this out of spite or to be mean or to pick on the kid.
I genuinely feel it came from a place of love/silliness and that it's being blown way out of proportion.
Yeah, you may be right -- it may have been intended in jest, hoping that the kid would think it was funny.

Nonetheless, in my opinion, it was a bone-headed move that made the child cry. An experienced teacher should know better than to joke about a child's disability in front of the class, even if it's a joke between the child and the teacher.

Again, I think our society can be overly-litigious, too, and it may be that this is being blown out of proportion and the child is being further humiliated by the extra attention his mom/the media/etc. are calling to the situation. But teachers shouldn't mock kids' problems publicly.

The teacher would've been much better off sticking with "most improved in social studies" -- that's something worthy of an award, and it focuses on the child's accomplishment, not his difficulties.

Last edited by namazu; 07-01-18 at 09:43 PM..
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Old 07-01-18, 09:52 PM
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Re: Child gets embarrassing add award.

I don't know. I just don't like this. Something seems off here to me. I don't trust the mom here. I want to go in trusting the teacher. And I'm not sure why it's that way...why I'm willing to blindly trust one, and not the other. But it is what it is.
Not enough info to go off of.

Plus I just don't like drama. I get upset when people blow things out of proportion.
The mom wanting to take legal action? It upsets me. I can feel it in the center of my chest. lol...teachers have it rough already. To me it's absolutely crystal clear that this teacher was doing this from a very warm/goofy heart. To think she was doing it to be mean in anyway is just ridiculous to me.

Again, there's just not enough info for me here. Too much of this story is left blank...and I just don't trust everything I read. I have bad feelings towards the mom for whatever reason.

I really don't like this.
And I don't like how society is so quick to jump on the teacher and treat her like a horrid person...without questioning more. Without needing more info.
But then again I'm no better or no different...cause I'm doing the exact same thing with the mother here.
So yeah...lol I should probably move on from this. I don't know why I'm reacting so strongly to this >.<'. I don't feel bad about it...but it is upsetting me.
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Old 07-01-18, 10:00 PM
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Re: Child gets embarrassing add award.

Quote:
Originally Posted by psychopathetic View Post
lol...teachers have it rough already. To me it's absolutely crystal clear that this teacher was doing this from a very warm/goofy heart. To think she was doing it to be mean in anyway is just ridiculous to me.
Yes, I agree that teachers have it rough, and it's likely that this was meant to be funny (though the teacher's sense of humor in the classroom may need some recalibration).

I've had the privilege of learning from some fabulous teachers, and known others who were incredible people who were great at their jobs. It is not an easy job.

But I've also occasionally met some teachers who were downright mean and insensitive to students with disabilities or other issues -- who mocked students for being slow, who hassled students for having "magical backpacks" from which assignments mysteriously vanished, who gave students grief for having poor fine motor control.

So I, too, viscerally react to stories like this. If the teacher hadn't made an unwise decision -- namely, to call the whole class' attention to the student's disability-related weaknesses -- then there wouldn't have been anything to blow out of proportion in the first place. I wouldn't say, based on the info we got from the story, that the teacher is necessarily "a horrid person" -- just one who made an insensitive choice that embarrassed a student for his disability.
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Old 07-01-18, 10:19 PM
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Re: Child gets embarrassing add award.

Quote:
But I've also occasionally met some teachers who were mean and insensitive to students with disabilities or other issues -- who mocked students for being slow, who hassled students for having "magical backpacks" from which assignments mysteriously vanished, who gave students grief for having poor fine motor control.
You are right, and that makes me so sad .
I can honestly see my dad doing this. To me...but most especially to one of the amazing kids he worked with when he was a respite care provider.
He could be such an intensive jerk. And he'd do it just to be a jerk. Cause for some very sick reason...doing so made him somehow feel better. Like it was humorous to him.
Man I could strangle him sometimes. :*(

It's just...gross. People like this.

I sure hope the teacher wasn't like this. In my "lala perfect" land I live in (inside my comfy safety bubble lol) I like to think the teacher genuinely cared about this kid and was truly doing it in pure...clean...jest. With full confidence that doing such wouldn't hurt the kid in any way.

That's why I'm reacting so strongly here...cause I so strongly believe the teacher did what she did out of a positive space in her heart.

There's just no information I read that gives me any reason to think anything but. I don't like to think jerks like my dad exist unless I'm forced to lol xP. It's a lot happier to think everyone is nice and friendly and fluffy!! lol

(((((((Namsy-Nam-Nams)))))))

haha I'm glad I typed this out. I was pretty tense there, but now thinking things over and seeing where you're coming from and everything...I'm feeling a lot better.
Thank you Nams
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Old 07-02-18, 03:58 AM
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Re: Child gets embarrassing add award.

In think one of the issues here is that she did this in front of the class. Even if her intentions were intentionally benign she chose to make an example out of this kid...and most kind do not like that kind of attention even if its all in "good fun". I cant say that I wholly support a lawsuit over the whole thing but I definitely think the mother has a point in being upset for her son. I dont understand how this teacher could think anything good would have come of an award like this. If she had given the award out to any kid based on them being generally distracted, regardless of the adhd then maybe I would be more likely to see it as funny but the fact that this kid has adhd, has a 504 and has known issues shows that she either doesnt take his issues seriously, or doesnt think the class does, or doesnt think he would mind having the attention brought to him for such an award.
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Old 07-02-18, 06:27 AM
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Re: Child gets embarrassing add award.

Quote:
Originally Posted by sarahsweets View Post
In think one of the issues here is that she did this in front of the class.
Yeah, I can agree with this.

Quote:
I definitely think the mother has a point in being upset for her son.
This too.
I'd of had a REAL rough go of things in life if I hadn't had a mom to fight for me.
/sigh.
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Old 07-02-18, 08:35 AM
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Re: Child gets embarrassing add award.

This may be pulling the thread a bit off topic. There seems to be a culture now where not only do folks want justice, they also want instant exposure. They want things to go viral. They want their outrage to spread as far and as fast as possible without considering the implications that may have on the people they’re dealing with.

It may be that this particular teacher and this particular school system have not been responsive to the student. It may be that this incident is the straw that broke the camels back. But it may also be a chance for the mother to get exposure.

I get being frustrated. I get being angry. A part of this feels like the reason I tend to sit on emails I write when angry before sending them. It’s easy to forget that the teacher is a (possibly very flawed) human being as well. Especially as keyboard warriors join in the outrage.

This is why I often step back and consider the story and the source when some perceived injustice goes viral. Was the horrible service limited to one person, or is it systemic to the institution? I hate when I see a brigade of one star reviews for a place that are from people who have never visited and reference the same story. I get the sentiment, but that’s not how things are supposed to work.
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Old 07-02-18, 09:59 AM
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Re: Child gets embarrassing add award.

Last paragraph from the article Sarah posted ...

Quote:
The mother said she was frustrated by the school’s response, adding that neither she nor her son received an apology. She intends to speak to a lawyer to talk about potentially taking legal action in an effort to “hopefully make change — make the administration more involved in what teachers and students are doing and protect students from having to deal with something like this in the future.”

To me that sounds like the mother brought this issue up with the school and
was brushed off.

It doesn't sound like she immediately jumped on the media, or went straight to
the idea of calling a lawyer.

I don't think the award was funny or humerous in any way.
I think it was humiliating for the kids who got them ... apparently more than one.
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