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  #1  
Old 04-19-11, 07:49 PM
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Fear!!!

How often does fear keep you from doing what you want to do? Do you have fear of success or fear of failure.
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Old 04-19-11, 09:11 PM
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Re: Fear!!!

Fear of the unknown. I really don't have any idea of what the future will be like. I can't even see my own scenarios of how things might turn out. So I just stay in fear of change and hope things always stay the same.
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Old 04-19-11, 09:44 PM
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Re: Fear!!!

I have a fear of failure after trying to do something the right way.I fear putting my all into something & then failing to accomplish what I was trying to do.It stops me from attempting all kinds of things.
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Old 04-19-11, 10:40 PM
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Re: Fear!!!

I fear failure which stop be doing a lot of things. i have failed in many things so now i don't expect myself to do a lot.
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Old 04-19-11, 10:44 PM
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Re: Fear!!!

I fear failure to because i always want to learn the right way so i am afraid i will learn the wrong way and have to double back... it's holding me back from doing a lot of things i love.. hopefully meds work..lol.
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Old 04-20-11, 02:22 AM
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Re: Fear!!!

How timely...
I've been reading a great book titled, "Extreme Fear"
After my last mtb accident, this book popped up and it's been a great read for understanding the subject of fear in humans.
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Sometimes I worry that if I don't slow down... I'll run my batteries down and won't be able to recharge myself... powered down permanently at such a young age!
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Old 04-20-11, 03:59 AM
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Re: Fear!!!

Fear destroys my life and stops me from doing the things I want and need to do. I hate having PTSD coz the effect adrenaline has on me now makes things I used to love seem terrifying.
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Old 04-20-11, 04:05 AM
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Re: Fear!!!

Quote:
Originally Posted by buddy View Post
I have a fear of failure after trying to do something the right way.I fear putting my all into something & then failing to accomplish what I was trying to do.It stops me from attempting all kinds of things.
I feel exactly the same way sometimes
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Old 04-20-11, 08:52 AM
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Re: Fear!!!

Lets not confuse the fear of failure with the failure of success
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Old 04-20-11, 10:04 AM
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Re: Fear!!!

I'm not as afraid of failing short term goals when I'm not taking my adderall. When I'm unmedicated I come off, to people who don't know me well, as amazingly confident and brave but in reality it's just complete lack of foresight.

With long term goals I get bored with them or decide they're too much work and just give up before I even start.

When I'm on my adderall and I slow down to think about things I recognize that I could fail, and sometimes that does stop me. Other times I bite the bullet and keep telling myself I can do it. Most of the time I need an extra push from someone else though.
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Old 04-20-11, 10:25 AM
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Re: Fear!!!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Offle View Post
I'm not as afraid of failing short term goals when I'm not taking my adderall. When I'm unmedicated I come off, to people who don't know me well, as amazingly confident and brave but in reality it's just complete lack of foresight.

With long term goals I get bored with them or decide they're too much work and just give up before I even start.

When I'm on my adderall and I slow down to think about things I recognize that I could fail, and sometimes that does stop me. Other times I bite the bullet and keep telling myself I can do it. Most of the time I need an extra push from someone else though.
Why do you think the adderall helps you have confidence in achieving your short term goal
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Old 04-20-11, 11:10 AM
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Re: Fear!!!

Are we talking about fear or perfectionism? A lot of what people posted so far seems more like perfectionism. I was always not doing stuff because I felt I couldn't do it perfectly so why bother.

I a really way, lowering my standards has really helped.
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Old 04-20-11, 11:59 AM
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Re: Fear!!!

I have never been a profectionist
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Old 04-20-11, 05:09 PM
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Re: Fear!!!

Fear of failure and erring in front of others are major problems for me, probably due to anxiety and being a perfectionist (the latter probably being the byproduct of anxiety to a large extent).

I am not really concerned with doing or learning to do things the right way as long as I am successful. Blazing your own path and coming up with new ways to do things or think about things, even showing pre-existing ways to be "wrong," while still "succeeding," is better than conforming to whatever is inter-subjectively held to be the "right way."
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Old 04-20-11, 05:21 PM
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Re: Fear!!!

I would say fear of failure, fear of embarrassment due to failure, fear of doing something successfully and not being able to repeat it, perfectionism plays into all of it for sure, but I also think that I've messed so many things up that I'm afraid to even try sometimes. Fear of being alone has always played into things. A lot of times I'm afraid to talk in social situations because I lack confidence in myself and I've been overly open or said too much, so I sometimes just keep quiet to avoid that. I got married young, never really found out who I was to start with, and then had kids early, so I have a fear of really figuring myself out and not liking who I am. I guess I'm just afraid of a lot of things, but I think that the fear is at times a good thing, because getting over the fear of something makes you stronger, such as standing up for yourself, stepping out of your comfort zone in general, or succeeding when you were afraid to fail, or failing and learning it's okay to fail at something. Fear may hold us back, but it can also push us to do more.
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