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  #1  
Old 08-10-17, 06:09 PM
Biscotti Biscotti is offline
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Introducing myself to drugs and this forum

Hi there,

I say I'm a new member but this is not completely true as I thought of making this post for a few months now. I guess I am not the only one around here having a terrible time actually doing the things I set my mind to...

So here's my background.

I'm 30 male and I've been teaching in high school for a few years now. I kind of failed at being a good union representative but I like to think I do my job very well. My classes are going well and I'm almost always on time but I tend to find some normal aspects of life more tiresome than I feel they should be. For instance, I can't really wake up early and expect to be functional even though my first class is at 1 pm. When I teach my first class, I'm very energetic but once the students leave, I can't even write an email and I tend to fall in some kind of mental buzz that doesn't really go away and I feel emptied for the rest of the day. Unless it's a really good day, I often feel to tired to small talk my way through dinner with my colleagues.

Ever since I was in high school myself, I always found it very difficult to start doing things (homeworks and such) and when I would actually sit and work, my attention would be easily disrupted. I was diagnosed a depression when I was 16 or so and my grades really went down but I always find a way to have decent grades despite not working that hard. Throughout college, I wouldn't study much neither as I told myself my social life or my soccer beer league was more interesting than school anyway. I still, again, found a way to get past it despite my teachings internships weren't particularly stellar. I obviously wasn't well prepared.

Throughout all these years, I kept telling myself I was on the verge on changing but nothing really did change. People see my as outspoken, energetic and smart but I feel I'm always trailing behind my life. I can't find the time to learn and read as much as I would like. It occurred to me that I have only read two books since last summer even though I keep buying more. I would like to be a better reader (being able to pick-up a novel and finish it in a couple hours straight or within a few days without seeing it as a chore) but on a common day, I lose focus while reading kind of fast. I also have a certain talent in writing (not in english, mind you) but I can't ever find the strength to work on it. I think what we could call my mental energy fluctuates more than in others. I can be impressively eloquent and on the same day, in another conversation, I may try to dodge eyes contacts and I won't be able to remember anybody's name.

In rare cases, when I feel happy and plentiful, I am filled with energy, my mind is racing and it's fun to be around me. I feel I can do it all, but like all things it doesn't ever last. If I could be in that state on a more regular basis, I think I would fare much better and that is kind of what I am seeking through ADD drugs.
I don't feel much things. I rarely laugh thought I can be funny and I did not shed a tear for about 20 years now. Perhaps it is somewhat connected with deficiencies in my Serotonin, dopamin levels.

I also feel like I need alot of sleep. If I don't sleep for at least 9 good hours, I can't really do anything. I thought of getting Modafinil for this.

I spoke to my doctor and she prescribed me Concerta (18 mg I think). I never could take it on consecutive days because I would feel terrible during the day. I became really anxious and the ADD symptoms actually got worse. I was to confused to fonction and engage in social interactions. I also felt the need to drink and smoke alot. Also, I couldn't really sleep on the first night so I didn't feel like carrying this a second day around.

So if anyone read me this far, I guess my first question would be this one: what do you think I should ask my doctor to prescibe me?

Greetings all.
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  #2  
Old 08-10-17, 07:28 PM
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aeon aeon is offline
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Re: Introducing myself to drugs and this forum

Nothing, until you have had a full evaluation and diagnosis.


Cheers,
Ian
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Old 08-11-17, 05:27 AM
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sarahsweets sarahsweets is offline
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Re: Introducing myself to drugs and this forum

I dont understand what your diagnosis is if your doctor prescribed you concerta.
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