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  #1  
Old 05-05-18, 10:53 AM
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apothecia apothecia is offline
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Adult ADHD and college - Stuck in the Twilight Zone

I am really hating college right now. I'm frustrated and always feel stupid. I feel like my instructors are constantly judging me. I can tell by the way they look at me and snarky little things they say to me when I mess up. It's the end of the semester again and work always gets backed up because it takes me soooo long to finish the paperwork and report writing. I messed up a presentation pretty bad yesterday and I feel incredibly stupid and embarrassed, and worst of all I offended a teacher who I thought was really great. I am being held back again (this is the second class I've failed for a stupid mistake) and I just can't take it anymore. I am 40 and they treat me like I'm an 18 year old kid. They tell me things like "... I hope you learn from these mistakes" and I've been making these mistakes my whole life. It feels like sometimes my brain shorts out and when I try to rememer what happened a second ago, there's a hole there. I make really stupid mistakes that I have to pay for bigtime. I never ever would have done those things intentionally, but because I did I'm not even going to graduate next week like I was supposed to. It sucks. I wanna drop out so bad, but I worked so hard for so many years and I'm almost finished. It seems like the harder I try, the more I screw up and the farther behind I fall.
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Old 05-05-18, 02:37 PM
allesandro1 allesandro1 is offline
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Re: Adult ADHD and college - Stuck in the Twilight Zone

Take a deep breath; remember you won't be there forever. You're there with a goal in mind. When you reach your goal these people will barely be remembered.
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Old 05-07-18, 02:12 AM
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Re: Adult ADHD and college - Stuck in the Twilight Zone

I'm in school right now too, i'm 38. I do exactly the same thing. My frustration builds and i make mistakes or don't put all my effort into something. Lately i'm taking the "walk away" approach. When i'm beating my head against the wall i go do something else. take a walk around the block, go wash my car. Anything to take my mind off whatever i'm stressing about. It works most of the time. And i find a nice workout gets my brain to calm down a lot. Usually i can think about what i did wrong, or rewrite a paper later at night. I find i'm really good at writing late at night. And lately i write papers with earbuds in (kills all background noise) and i listen to classical music. turned down low so it's more white noise than music. Then my thoughts are so much clearer. I do the same with arguing with teachers. We are living parallel lives. This sounds "normal" for "us". ADHD is so vaguely understood. Can you complete the course over the summer? graduate then?
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Old 05-09-18, 04:24 PM
mind_in_orbit mind_in_orbit is offline
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Re: Adult ADHD and college - Stuck in the Twilight Zone

I was fine when it was just classes--doing research has been much harder. You have to be self-motivated, yet also conform well enough to work on a collaborative team. I tend to bounce back and forth between extremes--in the right mood I can think in a very rote sort of way, the rest of the time I think very originally and freeform. In the latter state, whenever I come up with an idea, then days later I feel it wasn't original enough and move on. It seems the people who succeed best in academia know how to be "just original enough".
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Old 09-27-18, 08:38 PM
shaunG shaunG is offline
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Re: Adult ADHD and college - Stuck in the Twilight Zone

Quote:
Originally Posted by apothecia View Post
I am really hating college right now. I'm frustrated and always feel stupid. I feel like my instructors are constantly judging me. I can tell by the way they look at me and snarky little things they say to me when I mess up. It's the end of the semester again and work always gets backed up because it takes me soooo long to finish the paperwork and report writing. I messed up a presentation pretty bad yesterday and I feel incredibly stupid and embarrassed, and worst of all I offended a teacher who I thought was really great. I am being held back again (this is the second class I've failed for a stupid mistake) and I just can't take it anymore. I am 40 and they treat me like I'm an 18 year old kid. They tell me things like "... I hope you learn from these mistakes" and I've been making these mistakes my whole life. It feels like sometimes my brain shorts out and when I try to rememer what happened a second ago, there's a hole there. I make really stupid mistakes that I have to pay for bigtime. I never ever would have done those things intentionally, but because I did I'm not even going to graduate next week like I was supposed to. It sucks. I wanna drop out so bad, but I worked so hard for so many years and I'm almost finished. It seems like the harder I try, the more I screw up and the farther behind I fall.
I would tell the instructors what your issue is and if need be go over their heads. You have a learning disability and they literally must accommodate it according to law.

I had to do this with my math courses in college.
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