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  #1  
Old 08-06-12, 10:10 PM
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Newbie Introduction

Hi folks. Just trying to get the "lay of the land" here. Hopefully, I won't commit too many faux pas with my posts. Seems to be a pretty active forum, which is what I was hoping for.

I'll share a brief intro to my story here. Hopefully, I won't embarrass myself too much.

Am a middle aged working adult with very young kids. I suppose a lot of people are stretched with that time in life under even the best of circumstances. But I started reading about all kinds of topics searching for some help with why I seemed to be struggling in a way that was different from others, especially with stress and variations in my energy levels.

Seemed like I was really good at a lot of "hard" things, but was always underperforming on the stuff that "everyone else" could do. Then I read some ADD information, and it shocked me because they were talking about me.

So I went to a psychologist to find out what was going on, and figured at least I could get help for the overwhelm and stress. I had really thought for a while that it was just the added work and home responsibility that I hadn't adjusted to. But the more I read about ADD, the more sure I was about it being me. So a "shrink", after some sessions and some neuropsych testing, was convinced it was ADD and said basically sent me away to try medication.

Still don't know how I will move ahead in terms of next steps. Counseling for stress and the associated life issues seemed to be helpful. Finding people that encourage me seems to be really nice in terms of feeling good about myself, but of course it doesn't solve the root issues. I could try medication, but am reluctant. Other types of lifestyle changes make sense, like better sleep, fish oils, diet changes, organizational efforts, etc. Might stick with that sort of thing while I'm trying to learn more about this thing that is called ADD.

Hmm. Let me detour for a moment, if I may. About ADD - confusion and disagreements seem to follow it around. Even the real name is ADHD, but people call it ADD. But the H is sometimes misleading. And there seems to be so much reactionary talk on the topic. People have a mission in life to either prove ADHD is real, or prove it's not real. To claim it's not truly diagnosable or it is clearly diagnosable. Or to convince people that medication is harmless, or to say it's dangerous. Or to prove working memory training programs are the answer, or to prove they are useless. Everyone has an opinion (including me, of course), but answers appear hard to come by. It's one more reason that I'm curious about real life people with real life observations and concerns like I hope to find here, to add a reality check to all the noise across the web.

Anyway, that's my story in a nutshell. Don't know yet how much info I'll find here, or commonality with how other people feel, but I figure I'll explore a little bit and see what's here. I do know that just getting a diagnosis, and reading some books, has really encouraged me. It's nice to have a name for my struggles, and to know that other people have some similar struggles (although it seems to be fairly distinctive in various people).

I also have to admit that I have some unexpected anger over the whole thing. I'm not a person that really has anger problems, and I don't honestly feel like I've gotten the short end of the stick - I like the hand I've been dealt. But something about the unresolved hurts of life with ADD, hurts that I didn't even know I had, seems to strike an emotional chord. I wonder if any other people felt anything similar when first diagnosed as an adult?

So I'm sure that if this is an active forum, you've heard the same sorts of comments from new members here about a million times already. But just consider me a new face in the crowd, interested to see what's here. Thanks for "listening"!
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Old 08-06-12, 11:33 PM
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Re: Newbie Introduction

Welcome to the forums!

Your feelings about the diagnosis are common, I really like this thread talking about feelings post-diagnosis.

http://www.addforums.com/forums/showthread.php?t=77087

Hope to see you around!
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Old 08-07-12, 12:13 AM
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Re: Newbie Introduction

Thanks CheekyMonkey. Interesting thread.

Yeah, I had mentioned to my wife that I seemed to be going through something like the grieving process. (And that's one of the next challenges I need to figure out - how to get her to understand better. She tries to understand, but it's clear that she "just doesn't get it" yet. And I don't know how to explain it yet, either. I kind of wonder if a non-ADD person can ever really understand what it's like.)

But the grieving thing with ADD is weird because it's not simple like when you face a "regular" loss. Still, I guess it's analogous in a way.

Grieving the loss of a loved one, you are hit with it every time you are in a situation that reminds you of them, or where you depending on them. Grieving in the ADD sense seems to hit you when you realize the pain or struggles you felt and didn't understand - i.e. you realize how ADD has affected you. And when it seems like a handicap, or a "broken brain".

But I figure that when the emotions pass and all the rapid fire "discoveries" about ADD slow down, it really boils down to the fact that I've made it his far pretty well, and knowing what I'm fighting against should only make things easier in the future.

Oh well. As other people have probably discovered, all this can really get a mind racing with all the new info and trying to work through it all. I guess it will take time to sort it all out, especially in terms of what it all means to me, and a plan moving forward.

Glad to have found this community.
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Old 08-07-12, 12:14 AM
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Re: Newbie Introduction

It is a rather wild ride at first. Hang in there!
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