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  #31  
Old 10-11-05, 04:48 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Moody Blonde
Ah yes! The good ol' narcissist! The ADDer's worst nightmare.

The ADDer to the Narcissist: "Hey, how are you?"
The Narcissist: "Uh, fine! Why do you ask!! Why would you think something is wrong with me?!"
The ADDer: "Uh, OK, just asking....."
The Narcissist: "You are SO rude!!!!! Are you always this nosy?!"

ADDer backs off bewildered and confused.....spending the next 30 minutes trying to figure out what he did to tick off the Narcissist....when actually, he did nothing to tick off the narcissist....except exist, of course.
LOL...only after they have scored you as supply...there is some sweet ego boosting to get you to that point.

NPDer: "Who am I?"
ADDer: "You are just like me!"
NPDer: "You are me!"
ADDer: "I am? ok...."

The NPDer has a main question "Who am I?"
The ADDer has the Question "Where am I?" (In relationships, this is "Who is like me?")

Good narcissists are the tough ones to see coming...just like a "good virus" does not kill its host...a "good narcissist" knows how to keep his/her supply ensconced.
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  #32  
Old 10-11-05, 06:20 PM
BlueRanger BlueRanger is offline
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MY FRIENDS SAYS I GOT ADHD , BUT SOMETIMES I GET EXTREMELY MELLOW EVEN WHEN I AM NOT ON RITALIN I AM SO MELLOW AND SO CALM SOMETIMES I DON"T KNOW WHY?

BUT SOMETIMES I AM SO CRAZY JUMPY , BUT SOMETIMES I AM SO CALM I LOOK LIKE THAT CAPTAIN GUY PEOPLE SAY.


and because I have adhd , I never really is happy ever , I can never really find that the world is happy enough for me even I rode the rollar coaster repeatively over 100 times.

But is not like that with ADHD , PEOPLE THINK A LOT WITH ADHD DO YOU KNOW?

THEY THINK WHAT IS BEYOND NORMAL PEOPLE THINKING YOU NEVER KNOW YOU JUST THINK I AM SOME CRAZY JUMPY GUY WHEN I AM NOT.


I THINK ABOUT MORE THINGS THEN YOU , I THINK ABOUT WHATS FUN BEYOND THIS WORLD YOU KNOW? LIKE INSTEAD OF THE FUN YOU CAN DO HERE BUT WHAT IF THERE WAS FUN OUT OF THIS WORLD?

out of this realm...
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  #33  
Old 10-12-05, 04:34 AM
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Quote:
The ER+HM type is primarily using a man or a woman as an adornment...so they must be attractive. ER+CM tends to be almost non-sexual and will choose a mate purely on how smart they appear...then drive them into the ground telling them that they are "disordered" or foolish...but around others, praising them...silly game

He fits all the "traits" except the non-sexual, he has period of just the opposite.....

I do not trust this man to hang around in "my old age", it is like a gut feeling.....



Quote:
Since there is no "ego control" there is no self reflection and no training.

This was one of those Ah Ha moments....I thought it was the over ridged self boundaries...funny ridgid boundaries other to self but intrusive upon boundaries of others!!!! Abuse and emotional absence is positive in childhood...father alcoholic...mother drank committed suicide when he was 13..he like found he...this would mind f**k any one but hey I seem unable to do any thing except I have enough of the good ole hyper active energy and ingenueity to escape before the life is sucked out of me.





Quote:
Congrats on wonderful boundary setting!

This gets tiring even for those of us who have abundant energy. I have had more emergy loss over last 2.5 years than I did in 26 of rearing three ADD girls.


Good site link Chain you have been of an assist than you will probably ever know.... thanks ((((((((((cyber hug)))))))))))))
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  #34  
Old 12-09-06, 01:17 AM
Inmate 839221 Inmate 839221 is offline
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Hi Chain,

Quote:
Extreme lack of focus: (Focus drives dopamine in healthy ADD, Ego driven dopamine reduces focus)
Can you please describe this further? I'm asking because I believe what you put in parenthesis may pertain to me. Can you give an example of ego driven dopamine?
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  #35  
Old 04-07-07, 03:36 PM
rebx rebx is offline
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wow, i think ive been w/a narcissist for years, there has always been a great power struggle, we have both grown up a lot and changed during the time. Ive become more in control, I refuse to tolerate any kind of his unacceptable behaviors, and he knows it, not that he has "changed" i know you cant change someone, but you can change the way someone treats you, if they wish to be a part of your life. we love each other very much, and though we know we shouldnt be together, we have grown to close, we have severed ties before and life has been fine, but always end up back together. I know this is wrong and i should cut him from my life, but being with him has taught me so much about myself, and i feel that when we are both done learning what we need to learn from each other, then we can part ways, but now doesnt feel like the time, just because people have problems doesnt mean there feelings arent genuine. He can't stay away from me i think because i am the only person who he lets know the real him, not what he puts out from fear and fragile ego. I'm pretty confused, this should be prolly be a new post in itself, but your writing was very good.
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  #36  
Old 01-09-08, 09:02 PM
bpike1 bpike1 is offline
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Re: ADD and fragile Ego

hi. I am a type 3 overfocused ADDer, and at the beginning of the summer, I managed to do what you talked about--ignore the tape recorder. Instead of living through listening to the tape player, I got the confidence to ignore it and just to live through doing the things that I liked doing. My confidence skyrocketed. I was able to stop obsessing, and with that came an increased ability to focus--I remember watching movies and being able to actively register every single thing that someone said--lol. I remember having the thought that I could do anything if I set my mind to it as long as I never obsessed. It was great. However, my mistake was in the associated belief that, because I could ignore the tape recorder, I could also find ways of enjoying myself around any kind of person. Because of this, I started spending time with this *******, and after a while I found that I could not ignore the tape recorder. Eventually, I actually developed minor PTSD from this incident that I am still recovering from today. I know that my goal is to get back to that frame of mind I was in at the beginning of my summer, but while taking care to set up social boundaries. But the problem is, is that I can't ignore the tape recorder. Whenever I relax, the obsessions take over my life and zap my motivation. I'm thinking of going on a minor dose of an antidepressant--but part of me really wants to beat this on my own. Is extreme will power the key here?
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  #37  
Old 01-09-08, 10:34 PM
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Exclamation Re: ADD and fragile Ego

This thread is rather dated....

I'm not sure Chain is around to give a reply anymore?

I could be wrong...
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  #38  
Old 06-11-10, 12:19 PM
sambo88 sambo88 is offline
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Re: ADD and fragile Ego

Earlier this year I did some reading relating to these ideas which I think are very true - and I snapped out of the ego thing, everything was awesome and it was like being born again for the first time, aswell as the anxiety and depression reduced, everything seemed new and full of wonder. I don't know what happened though, it slipped, maybe I could reach that again, but its very difficult to maintain depending on your personal circumstances.

I would love to unlock this clarity and freedom again, but I guess I would need help, does anyone know any books, websites that can offer further guidance / insight?
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  #39  
Old 04-25-12, 09:13 AM
careta careta is offline
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Re: ADD and fragile Ego

Awesome info!
Thank you so much!
That really helps me understand myself .
Btw it feels really nice to realize im not so weird, that other people share my difficulties.
Thanks everyone in the forum!
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