ADD Forums - Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder Support and Information Resources Community  

Go Back   ADD Forums - Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder Support and Information Resources Community > ADULTS AND ADD/ADHD > Adults with ADD > Men with ADD/ADHD
Register Blogs FAQ Chat Members List Calendar Donate Gallery Arcade Mark Forums Read

Men with ADD/ADHD This forum is for men to discuss issues related to being a man with AD/HD.

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #16  
Old 05-10-11, 01:30 AM
sops's Avatar
sops sops is offline
Member
 

Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: Singapore
Posts: 36
Thanks: 9
Thanked 15 Times in 11 Posts
sops is on a distinguished road
Re: Increased sex drive from ADHD, becoming a problem

Wow.. I'm glad a lot of you feel the same way I do. Ever since I was a teen I have this insatiable drive and I remembered jacking off several times a day, every day when I was growing up. I'm 28 now and it's driving me nuts coz sometimes when I'm not having a busy period at work, I'd "relieve" myself several times too.

Even though my libido is in overdrive, I still stick to my principle of staying chaste until my wedding day. I have a girlfriend now and she shares the same idea of staying chaste but when we make out, the impulsivity thing made me do crazy things like beg her to take it up a notch and lucky for me she kept me in check but I'd have to relieve myself on my own. Frustrating at times!
Reply With Quote
The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to sops For This Useful Post:
HyperFOP (05-10-11), Hyperman87 (09-23-14)
  #17  
Old 10-13-13, 07:25 PM
polevaulter93 polevaulter93 is offline
Newbie
 

Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: Cleveland
Posts: 1
Thanks: 0
Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post
polevaulter93 is on a distinguished road
Re: Increased sex drive from ADHD, becoming a problem

I feel the same way. But as far as stimulants causing it, I find it unlikely, because the whole reason stimulants work in the first place is that your body overproduces them, which causes the hyperactivity aspect. Also I've been on both an SSRI and a stimulant since before puberty, and I still have a ridiculous sex drive, being that I have never been off one or the other or both I don't really know if not taking either of them would make a difference.
Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to polevaulter93 For This Useful Post:
Hyperman87 (10-14-13)
  #18  
Old 10-14-13, 04:04 AM
mattif's Avatar
mattif mattif is offline
Member
 

Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Oakland, California
Posts: 40
Thanks: 60
Thanked 47 Times in 22 Posts
mattif is just really nicemattif is just really nicemattif is just really nicemattif is just really nice
Re: Increased sex drive from ADHD, becoming a problem

My sex drive was already quite high before I ever took meds. And the meds revved it up even more.

But I'm not really clear as to why anyone would want to lower their sex drive.

If you're a guy who likes girls... and you think that adhd tends to cause the person to have a higher sex drive... then do everything you possibly can to find a really nice girl who has adhd. If the theory is correct, then the two of you would be likely, at the very least, to have an incredible sex life together! (And seriously, a relationship with great sex can overcome a lot of other problems.)

This discussion of sex as an addiction seems very problematic, to me. It seems to arise from the Puritanical assumption that pleasure is vaguely (if not explicitly) bad, sinful, etc.

Let's not conflate the term addiction with simply doing something frequently. Addiction requires some sort of harm -- something, essentially, unsustainable. But I don't care how many times a day you masturbate or have sex with your partner(s)... at the end of the day, if everyone is safe, happy, and has also been able to get those other necessary life tasks accomplished, then there is no addiction... it's just something you like to do a lot. It's no more an addiction than is riding your bike every day. Now, if you have a tendency of engaging in risky behaviors during sex, then that's a real problem, but the problem is the risky behaviors, not merely sex.


Here's a tangentially related question to consider, just for yourself:
Has your high sex drive resulted in you being a better lover? Have you learned your own sexual response so well, after so much practice on your own, that you find that you last longer and enjoy it more? Are you so into it, so focused on your partner and your mutual pleasure, that it tends to heighten the experience, resulting in having phenomenal, ecstatic sex? Seriously, like everything else in life, it takes a lot of practice to get really good at lovemaking.

Quote:
I eventually bought a 'fleshlight' and it's helped
To you, sir, I offer applause for your honesty... and your excellent taste in high-quality sex toys.

Quote:
Even though my libido is in overdrive, I still stick to my principle of staying chaste until my wedding day.
And to you, I offer my sincere condolences on your tragic loss.
Reply With Quote
The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to mattif For This Useful Post:
Fuzzy12 (10-14-13), Hyperman87 (10-14-13), Maurice (10-23-14)
Sponsored Links
  #19  
Old 10-14-13, 07:22 AM
ronmexico ronmexico is offline
Member
 

Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: USA
Posts: 54
Thanks: 0
Thanked 34 Times in 17 Posts
ronmexico has disabled reputation
Re: Increased sex drive from ADHD, becoming a problem

Quote:
Originally Posted by CameronBN View Post
Is this because I'm under stimulated or is my hypersexuality related to my ADHD?
That's horrible. Doesn't really matter. When I am with someone sex is once a day, often twice, and for sure middle of the night sex. Be glad that she ran. You need someone who is energized by you, not powered down. Totally lame.
Reply With Quote
  #20  
Old 10-14-13, 07:40 AM
Fuzzy12's Avatar
Fuzzy12 Fuzzy12 is offline
ADDvanced Forum ADDvocate
 

Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: UK
Posts: 20,283
Blog Entries: 1
Thanks: 32,680
Thanked 30,768 Times in 14,149 Posts
Fuzzy12 has a reputation beyond reputeFuzzy12 has a reputation beyond reputeFuzzy12 has a reputation beyond reputeFuzzy12 has a reputation beyond reputeFuzzy12 has a reputation beyond reputeFuzzy12 has a reputation beyond reputeFuzzy12 has a reputation beyond reputeFuzzy12 has a reputation beyond reputeFuzzy12 has a reputation beyond reputeFuzzy12 has a reputation beyond reputeFuzzy12 has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Increased sex drive from ADHD, becoming a problem

Quote:
Originally Posted by adhdwptsd View Post
Somebody finally with ballz...

I think this is an important topic, My X although I do not know if she was officially diagnosed with ADHD (Exhibited many signs) was a sex addict. Turns out she was into the dancing for cash scene etc. prior to us meeting. She had many sexual encounters from what she told me and started having sex at a young age and with a number of men of all different races, religions and ages just to experiment. I am not going to say that the sex was not wild but she went overboard. She used video often, Used alcohol as a stimuli, talked about sex outside the marriage... interracial and multipartner stuff blah blah... To this day I check on line to see if she is in one as through the grapevine I heard she was...Hey I look at car wrecks that does not mean I want to be in one..!

...
Reading this makes me incredibly sad. Is this really what people see as sex addiction? My understanding of addiction is more along these lines:

Quote:
Let's not conflate the term addiction with simply doing something frequently. Addiction requires some sort of harm -- something, essentially, unsustainable. But I don't care how many times a day you masturbate or have sex with your partner(s)... at the end of the day, if everyone is safe, happy, and has also been able to get those other necessary life tasks accomplished, then there is no addiction... it's just something you like to do a lot. It's no more an addiction than is riding your bike every day. Now, if you have a tendency of engaging in risky behaviors during sex, then that's a real problem, but the problem is the risky behaviors, not merely sex.
I think, everyone has different tastes and if ADHDwPTSD didn't share tastes similar to his ex that's perfectly fine and acceptable but I think, it's unfair to label the ex as a sex addict just because her tastes were different or more experimental. I am not saying that the ex wasn't a sex addict, I've got no way of knowing that, I just think that the description to me doesn't really warrant a diagnosis of addiction. I find that offensive to both the ex and to people who are actually suffering with an addiction.

Preferences are cultural/personal/relative but addictions are not. ADHDwPTSD might think that his ex was addicted to sex because her likes seemed outlandish/unacceptable with respect to his conventions. In other cultures, people might think you have a sex addiction for having sex before marriage. Well, if they are kind. Otherwise, they'll just call you a ****.
Reply With Quote
The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Fuzzy12 For This Useful Post:
Hyperman87 (10-14-13), mattif (10-14-13)
  #21  
Old 10-14-13, 08:46 AM
someothertime's Avatar
someothertime someothertime is offline
mod-estly regulated
 

Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: sydney
Posts: 4,729
Blog Entries: 2
Thanks: 12,998
Thanked 5,450 Times in 2,993 Posts
someothertime has a reputation beyond reputesomeothertime has a reputation beyond reputesomeothertime has a reputation beyond reputesomeothertime has a reputation beyond reputesomeothertime has a reputation beyond reputesomeothertime has a reputation beyond reputesomeothertime has a reputation beyond reputesomeothertime has a reputation beyond reputesomeothertime has a reputation beyond reputesomeothertime has a reputation beyond reputesomeothertime has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Increased sex drive from ADHD, becoming a problem

See someone.

Either your using sex as a distraction or you have an addiction.

Either way it's preventing you from discovering a more maintainable satisfaction that can be derived from ones true desires. But first you gotta pin down where the blockage is.

With time and clarity, plain ol' sex will be seen as a vehicle for connection and expression.

In the short term do yourself a favour and whenever you feel the urge ask yourself... Am I taking or giving?

Oh sugar... Another relic I respond to like it happened yesterday lol... I gotta start checking the post dates on these things!
__________________
The goal is personally satisfying personal quality.
And to support other people in attaining their own personally satisfying personal quality.
And then to share.
~ SB_UK ~
Reply With Quote
  #22  
Old 10-14-13, 02:08 PM
Hyperman87's Avatar
Hyperman87 Hyperman87 is offline
Forum ADDvocate
 

Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: Michigan
Posts: 1,319
Thanks: 3,889
Thanked 1,316 Times in 642 Posts
Hyperman87 has a brilliant futureHyperman87 has a brilliant futureHyperman87 has a brilliant futureHyperman87 has a brilliant futureHyperman87 has a brilliant futureHyperman87 has a brilliant futureHyperman87 has a brilliant futureHyperman87 has a brilliant futureHyperman87 has a brilliant futureHyperman87 has a brilliant futureHyperman87 has a brilliant future
Re: Increased sex drive from ADHD, becoming a problem

[quote=mattif;1553814]My sex drive was already quite high before I ever took meds. And the meds revved it up even more.

But I'm not really clear as to why anyone would want to lower their sex drive.

If you're a guy who likes girls... and you think that adhd tends to cause the person to have a higher sex drive... then do everything you possibly can to find a really nice girl who has adhd. If the theory is correct, then the two of you would be likely, at the very least, to have an incredible sex life together! (And seriously, a relationship with great sex can overcome a lot of other problems.)





Yes, ADHD for me causes a very high sex drive as well. Personally, I think many if not most sufferers of Adult ADHD(Male & Female) have unusually high libidos caused by the hyperactive-impulsive symptoms. Stimulant medication tends to increase this secondary symptom of adult hyperactivity.So yes my dream-girl would be a hyperactive ADHD woman!
__________________
Confirmed diagnoses:Adult A D H D (COMBINED TYPE)
Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to Hyperman87 For This Useful Post:
mattif (10-14-13)
  #23  
Old 10-14-13, 02:14 PM
Rebelyell's Avatar
Rebelyell Rebelyell is offline
ADDvanced Forum ADDvocate
 

Join Date: May 2010
Location: Somerset NJ
Posts: 10,528
Thanks: 6,551
Thanked 11,474 Times in 6,073 Posts
Rebelyell has a reputation beyond reputeRebelyell has a reputation beyond reputeRebelyell has a reputation beyond reputeRebelyell has a reputation beyond reputeRebelyell has a reputation beyond reputeRebelyell has a reputation beyond reputeRebelyell has a reputation beyond reputeRebelyell has a reputation beyond reputeRebelyell has a reputation beyond reputeRebelyell has a reputation beyond reputeRebelyell has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Increased sex drive from ADHD, becoming a problem

Ahh that's nothing try adhd n bp , makes you go like a porn star on crack.lol
Reply With Quote
The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Rebelyell For This Useful Post:
Hyperman87 (10-14-13), Maurice (10-23-14)
  #24  
Old 10-14-13, 02:18 PM
Abi Abi is offline
Registered
 

Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: The Underworld
Posts: 16,425
Blog Entries: 4
Thanks: 14,234
Thanked 17,760 Times in 8,903 Posts
Abi has a reputation beyond reputeAbi has a reputation beyond reputeAbi has a reputation beyond reputeAbi has a reputation beyond reputeAbi has a reputation beyond reputeAbi has a reputation beyond reputeAbi has a reputation beyond reputeAbi has a reputation beyond reputeAbi has a reputation beyond reputeAbi has a reputation beyond reputeAbi has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Increased sex drive from ADHD, becoming a problem

Get a small (subclinical) dose of an SSRI. 10mg Celexa should quell your drive sufficiently without causing any untoward effects.
__________________
"If we were all ice cream [...] Abi would be rocky road" - RHW

"I think David Archuleta's picture is starting to annoy me." - BellaVita

"A glass of water is healthier than a glass of vodka - but you don't substitute one for the other." - aeon

Follow ADDForums on Twitter & Facebook
Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to Abi For This Useful Post:
Hyperman87 (10-14-13)
  #25  
Old 10-14-13, 03:55 PM
mattif's Avatar
mattif mattif is offline
Member
 

Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Oakland, California
Posts: 40
Thanks: 60
Thanked 47 Times in 22 Posts
mattif is just really nicemattif is just really nicemattif is just really nicemattif is just really nice
Re: Increased sex drive from ADHD, becoming a problem

Quote:
Originally Posted by Abi View Post
Get a small (subclinical) dose of an SSRI. 10mg Celexa should quell your drive sufficiently without causing any untoward effects.
Aaaarrrgghh!

This is not just directed at Abi, but to anyone who has suggested that some people should attempt to physically lower their sex drive, particularly through the use of chemical suppressants...

WHY? Why would you possibly do this?

If someone has a problem with talking a lot, we don't tell them to get an extended treatment of laryngitis. Instead, we recommend finding strategies to cope; methods to channel those tendencies in more constructive directions.

If people are annoyed because you always have the right answer, and you tend to blurt it out without waiting for others (because they are all so interminably slow), then you may need to find some strategies to help recognize and redirect those tendencies in a more productive direction... but the answer is definitely not that you need a lobotomy.

So why is a higher sex drive somehow different? Why is the first option to crush it? That just sounds horrible, to me. If that is to be an option, at all, then it should be the absolute last, we-tried-everything-else-but-nothing-worked option.

OK... I'm sorry if I sound too aggressive and angry, here. That's not my intention. But I am sort of shocked and a bit upset. I would honestly like someone to explain how such an approach is (a) reasonable, and even if so, then (b) why is it a first-line solution?

Please elucidate, for I am truly perplexed.
Reply With Quote
The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to mattif For This Useful Post:
Hyperman87 (10-14-13), Maurice (10-26-14)
  #26  
Old 10-14-13, 04:18 PM
dvdnvwls dvdnvwls is offline
Mr. BllVt
 

Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Anywhere I can
Posts: 14,912
Thanks: 1,278
Thanked 17,971 Times in 9,012 Posts
dvdnvwls has a reputation beyond reputedvdnvwls has a reputation beyond reputedvdnvwls has a reputation beyond reputedvdnvwls has a reputation beyond reputedvdnvwls has a reputation beyond reputedvdnvwls has a reputation beyond reputedvdnvwls has a reputation beyond reputedvdnvwls has a reputation beyond reputedvdnvwls has a reputation beyond reputedvdnvwls has a reputation beyond reputedvdnvwls has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Increased sex drive from ADHD, becoming a problem

I'm with mattif on this one. If your sex drive is high, then satisfy it. If you are driven to high-risk sex, or if you frequently forget to go to school or work because you're too busy masturbating, you should see your doctor - otherwise high sex drive is good for you and you should enjoy it instead of medicalizing it.
Reply With Quote
The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to dvdnvwls For This Useful Post:
Hyperman87 (10-14-13), mattif (10-14-13), Maurice (10-26-14)
  #27  
Old 10-14-13, 07:21 PM
Hyperman87's Avatar
Hyperman87 Hyperman87 is offline
Forum ADDvocate
 

Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: Michigan
Posts: 1,319
Thanks: 3,889
Thanked 1,316 Times in 642 Posts
Hyperman87 has a brilliant futureHyperman87 has a brilliant futureHyperman87 has a brilliant futureHyperman87 has a brilliant futureHyperman87 has a brilliant futureHyperman87 has a brilliant futureHyperman87 has a brilliant futureHyperman87 has a brilliant futureHyperman87 has a brilliant futureHyperman87 has a brilliant futureHyperman87 has a brilliant future
Re: Increased sex drive from ADHD, becoming a problem

Quote:
Originally Posted by dvdnvwls View Post
I'm with mattif on this one. If your sex drive is high, then satisfy it. If you are driven to high-risk sex, or if you frequently forget to go to school or work because you're too busy masturbating, you should see your doctor - otherwise high sex drive is good for you and you should enjoy it instead of medicalizing it.




I totally agree(with everybody who says a high sex drive is good)! It really, really is(especially in younger people). However, when you mix high sex drive with disorders/illnesses related to control over your impulses: Attention deficit/hyperactivity disorder(ADHD), Bi-polar disorder, Autism, Parkinson disease & Alzheimer's dementia.It can potentially cause you problems, if you cannot control yourself?

Some people with these neurolgic disorders must simply force themselves to exercise some sexual restraint(if possible). If you can't, it certainly is a great idea to find a girlfriend or wife with the hyperactive/impulsive sub-type of ADHD. Odds are certainly in an ADHD man's favor if we go that route. I don't know of any man with the hyperactive sub-type of ADHD, that would not have this problem in reality. I know I do!
__________________
Confirmed diagnoses:Adult A D H D (COMBINED TYPE)
Reply With Quote
  #28  
Old 10-14-13, 07:26 PM
dvdnvwls dvdnvwls is offline
Mr. BllVt
 

Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Anywhere I can
Posts: 14,912
Thanks: 1,278
Thanked 17,971 Times in 9,012 Posts
dvdnvwls has a reputation beyond reputedvdnvwls has a reputation beyond reputedvdnvwls has a reputation beyond reputedvdnvwls has a reputation beyond reputedvdnvwls has a reputation beyond reputedvdnvwls has a reputation beyond reputedvdnvwls has a reputation beyond reputedvdnvwls has a reputation beyond reputedvdnvwls has a reputation beyond reputedvdnvwls has a reputation beyond reputedvdnvwls has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Increased sex drive from ADHD, becoming a problem

Quote:
Originally Posted by Hyperman87 View Post
Some people with these neurolgic disorders must simply force themselves to exercise some sexual restraint(if possible). If you can't, it certainly is a great idea to find a girlfriend or wife with the hyperactive/impulsive sub-type of ADHD. Odds are certainly in an ADHD man's favor if we go that route.
I hadn't thought of it that way. That would perhaps make for a very strange-looking entry in the personals.
Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to dvdnvwls For This Useful Post:
Hyperman87 (10-14-13)
  #29  
Old 10-14-13, 07:29 PM
Hyperman87's Avatar
Hyperman87 Hyperman87 is offline
Forum ADDvocate
 

Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: Michigan
Posts: 1,319
Thanks: 3,889
Thanked 1,316 Times in 642 Posts
Hyperman87 has a brilliant futureHyperman87 has a brilliant futureHyperman87 has a brilliant futureHyperman87 has a brilliant futureHyperman87 has a brilliant futureHyperman87 has a brilliant futureHyperman87 has a brilliant futureHyperman87 has a brilliant futureHyperman87 has a brilliant futureHyperman87 has a brilliant futureHyperman87 has a brilliant future
Re: Increased sex drive from ADHD, becoming a problem

Yeah, just think there might be more arguments & fall-outs. However, imagine a woman with a sex drive as high as your own(I'm not certain, but I really believe they are out there. )
__________________
Confirmed diagnoses:Adult A D H D (COMBINED TYPE)
Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to Hyperman87 For This Useful Post:
Maurice (10-23-14)
  #30  
Old 10-14-13, 07:39 PM
Hyperman87's Avatar
Hyperman87 Hyperman87 is offline
Forum ADDvocate
 

Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: Michigan
Posts: 1,319
Thanks: 3,889
Thanked 1,316 Times in 642 Posts
Hyperman87 has a brilliant futureHyperman87 has a brilliant futureHyperman87 has a brilliant futureHyperman87 has a brilliant futureHyperman87 has a brilliant futureHyperman87 has a brilliant futureHyperman87 has a brilliant futureHyperman87 has a brilliant futureHyperman87 has a brilliant futureHyperman87 has a brilliant futureHyperman87 has a brilliant future
Re: Increased sex drive from ADHD, becoming a problem

Quote:
Originally Posted by mattif View Post
Aaaarrrgghh!

This is not just directed at Abi, but to anyone who has suggested that some people should attempt to physically lower their sex drive, particularly through the use of chemical suppressants...

WHY? Why would you possibly do this?

If someone has a problem with talking a lot, we don't tell them to get an extended treatment of laryngitis. Instead, we recommend finding strategies to cope; methods to channel those tendencies in more constructive directions.

If people are annoyed because you always have the right answer, and you tend to blurt it out without waiting for others (because they are all so interminably slow), then you may need to find some strategies to help recognize and redirect those tendencies in a more productive direction... but the answer is definitely not that you need a lobotomy.

So why is a higher sex drive somehow different? Why is the first option to crush it? That just sounds horrible, to me. If that is to be an option, at all, then it should be the absolute last, we-tried-everything-else-but-nothing-worked option.

OK... I'm sorry if I sound too aggressive and angry, here. That's not my intention. But I am sort of shocked and a bit upset. I would honestly like someone to explain how such an approach is (a) reasonable, and even if so, then (b) why is it a first-line solution?

Please elucidate, for I am truly perplexed.


Agreed, it's not a bad thing to enjoy(right). We just have to find others who think like we do. If your mate doesn't,then yes that could be a serious issue.
Which is why men with ADHD who have this problem,should at least attempt to find a woman with also has a very high libido,instead of feeling guilty or ashamed.


If,that approach backfires or isn't possible then yes an SSRI or a Tricyclic antidepressant might be required.In order, to help you gain control.Otherwise, like many men here! You might spend an unusual or unhealthy amount of time on the web, looking at porn-sites &/or masturbating.
__________________
Confirmed diagnoses:Adult A D H D (COMBINED TYPE)
Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to Hyperman87 For This Useful Post:
Maurice (10-23-14)
Reply

Bookmarks

Tags
drive, increase, relationship, sex


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On
Forum Jump

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
ADHD: Underdiagnosed and Undermedicated? APSJ Science in the Media 17 01-13-17 06:20 AM
Top 10 toys for children with ADHD Gregster ADD News 8 01-25-09 04:47 PM
ADHD Is Real: Millions of Adults Are Taking Medication for Disorder Andrew ADD News 2 01-25-05 09:22 AM
Vision Problem Can Be Misdiagnosed As ADHD Andrew ADD News 1 11-14-04 01:11 PM


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 08:40 AM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.7.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2019, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
(c) 2003 - 2015 ADD Forums