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Men with ADD/ADHD This forum is for men to discuss issues related to being a man with AD/HD.

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  #16  
Old 04-13-08, 08:31 PM
ComparedToWho ComparedToWho is offline
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Re: Gay Men/ADHD

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Originally Posted by amnorvend View Post
I like the idea of a gay ADD thread, but why limit it to gay men? I think it would be a good idea to have one for the whole GLBT community.
+1 from this chick! Woo-hoo, get that thread started!!
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  #17  
Old 04-13-08, 10:22 PM
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Re: Gay Men/ADHD

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Originally Posted by trent77 View Post
Does anyone have thoughts on gay dating and adhd? I find it makes it hugely more complicated than it already is! Non-adders are just so terribly boring to me (they speak too slow for starters),
You're telling me! My husband (I'm female btw). Talks so-o-o-o-o slow it drives me insane. A lot of the time, he'll just stop in the midst of telling me something, just leaving me to hang there, for what seems like forever (to me) until I just finally have to say "And..." or "go on."

But while I'm waiting in agony, he's just getting his thoughts together! Go figure...

Not only that, but he seems to almost always goes ALL THE WAY AROUND the subject instead of just gettin to The Point!

Sorry for going off on a tangent, But Just letting you know that I feel your frustration.

I like the idea of a gay ADD thread, but why limit it to gay men? I think it would be a good idea to have one for the whole GLBT community.

Yes!
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  #18  
Old 04-13-08, 10:46 PM
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Thumbs up Re: Gay Men/ADHD

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Originally Posted by amnorvend View Post
I like the idea of a gay ADD thread, but why limit it to gay men? I think it would be a good idea to have one for the whole GLBT community.
Yes!

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Originally Posted by amnorvend View Post
But I wouldn't be at all surprised if it was found that the bi-sexual and alternative sexuality/lifestyle scenes had a higher level of the ADD neurological marker(s) because of the ADDers apparent desire to experiment and seek stimulation impulsively and in novel ways. However I would suspect that the level of diagnosed ADD might be less as the ADDer finds themself in a culture where impulsivity, chaos, intuition and the search for stimulation are accepted as normal behaviours
I wholly agree - I went through a lesbian/bisexual phase. And even though I am now married to a man. I still find some women attractive. Just like I still find some men attractive.

I am "straight" as far as my lifestyle indicdates. However, I am "open to love" anyone, male or female. I do not like the term "bisexual" (even though technically that's what its aptly labelled). I prefere terms like "open to love" or "bi-lovable.

Okay, those are my thoughts on the matter.
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Old 10-01-08, 10:52 PM
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Re: Gay Men/ADHD

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Originally Posted by Mike77 View Post
I think I'm not gay but I wouldnt mind being gay except for the uglyness of males..
gosh, this is an easy one: keep the lights low or close your eyes.
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  #20  
Old 01-31-09, 10:19 PM
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Re: Gay Men/ADHD

Been looking for a gay thread...Glad I found this one. Being new to the who ADD world now I know that the problems I have had in the past with relationships, friendship and the out of control sex probably have to do with my ADD. I would not be surprised if there are more Gay ADDers men and women.
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  #21  
Old 01-31-09, 11:16 PM
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Re: Gay Men/ADHD

Ha, good thread. Gay male with ADHD here as well.

I'm not aware of any studies that show a higher or lower rate of ADHD among non-heterosexual people (Not surprising- despite a lot of media attention and self-reports from members of our community, there is right now not a shred of reproducable evidence that there is any biological difference between heterosexuals and non-heterosexuals. Lots of claims have been made, but no one has managed to replecate the studies).

But we certainly do have different issues to deal with surrounding ADHD. For one, gay men in major cities have a scourge of meth use taking its toll on the community- which poses problems with the gay man who walks around with a bottle of amphetamines. Also, we do have higher rates of commonly co-morbid disorders (namely substance abuse disorders, depression, and anxiety) than non-heterosexuals (This one is true across the gender spectum) which always complicates an ADHD diagnosis. Finally, in addition to having to find a doctor who is comfortable with the treatment of ADHD- we have to find doctors who are comfortable with our sex lives.

Anyway, I'd love to see a folder!
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  #22  
Old 01-31-09, 11:23 PM
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Re: Gay Men/ADHD

Oh my god- I can't date other ADHD men. I've done it, and it's ugly. I need someone totally centered and calm to keep me calm. You know how it goes- always dependent on the situation for energy levels. So when I'm with someone who's excitable- I get crazy. But if I'm with someone calm, I'm a bit more stable.
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  #23  
Old 02-05-09, 08:18 PM
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Re: Gay Men/ADHD

here is a good article on some of the science behind homosexuality: http://nymag.com/news/features/33520/

it would be interesting to compare adhd to sexuality in the population. perhaps the 'hyper-masculine' behaviour related to gay men (like increased sexual partners) could be related to the hunter/gather theory for adhd. or it could go the other way in that lesbians skew this way due to masculinization. something tells me there is a link somewhere!
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  #24  
Old 02-05-09, 09:17 PM
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Re: Gay Men/ADHD

My gosh, the LGBTQ thing finally came up. Yay!

Gay guy, ad/hd here... in a 5-year but "interesting" partnership with another guy with anxiety disorders. Whee!
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  #25  
Old 02-19-09, 08:10 AM
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Re: Gay Men/ADHD

i dont know if it has to do anything with ADHD, but... i could be considered a gay man as well, i think.

i am female - no genetic test was done, but i have a properly functioning and female looking body. the thing is that i do have the voice of a boy before puberty vocal change, everybody e.g. on youtube or on the phone thinks i am a 16 years old boy. also, i have a very male brain - as i found out at tests on the internet, like here:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/science/humanbo...add_user.shtml

where i scored very well on visual / spatial skills but rather poor on emotional tests; this also correlates with real life, where i basically behave like a 'standard male' in areas like clothes / haircut, hobbies, emotions, behaviour, talking (exept that i talk too much, but that may be due to ADHD, lol), etc.. i gotta mention that one psychiatrist suggested i have autistic traits, though my ADHD clinic says i do not fully qualify for something like asperger's; but i do definately have a systemizer-brain.

so, as i am into men - and sex / relationships etc. basically happen in the brain - you could say i am a gay man (in a female body).

PS: i have considered if i want to be male - and came to the conclusion that i wouldnt really change it if i have the choice. the male body has advantages as well as the female body... yeah, i cant pee while standing up easily, but therefor i never have to worry about getting it up. i wont get strong if i sit on the couch all day due to the lack of testosterone, but therefor, my hormone levels are better for my heart etc. and eventually allow me to live longer (statistically)... i can be kicked into the crotch without going down immediately... so, i think both genders have advantages and disadvantages which can be improved (as a woman, you can train your muscles, use pee tubes and take a one-phase long-term pill (contraceptive) to avoid menstruation, for example).
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  #26  
Old 02-19-09, 01:21 PM
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Re: Gay Men/ADHD

Gay male here too and wonder if there are any connectiosn or way that you find being Gay and ADHD change or improve anyones lives.
I find it to be another lab to add to the gay one
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  #27  
Old 02-25-09, 01:17 PM
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Re: Gay Men/ADHD

Gay with ADD too.

The main point here is all gay men are not ADD.

However, ADD people who oppositional deviant disorder as comorbidity have high chances of becoming gay, and also artists.

This is due to they oppose or contradict the normal people a lot and are quite different from child hood.
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Old 02-25-09, 04:16 PM
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Re: Gay Men/ADHD

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Originally Posted by vic_nic80 View Post
Gay with ADD too.

The main point here is all gay men are not ADD.

However, ADD people who oppositional deviant disorder as comorbidity have high chances of becoming gay, and also artists.

This is due to they oppose or contradict the normal people a lot and are quite different from child hood.

Where did you get this theory. would like to read more of the research on thsi topic (oppositional deviant disorder as comorbidity have high chances of becoming gay, and also artists. )
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Old 02-26-09, 09:10 AM
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Re: Gay Men/ADHD

Hi,

I get the theory from searching various research papers.

This is the description -

ADD Inattentive type + Oppositional defiant disorder (or Conduct disorder) = A rare combination but with high chances of becoming gay.

ADD + Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder = High risk of becoming addicted to substance abuse or sexual addict in case of both straight and gay men.

ADD Inattentive type + Depression + Anxiety or OCD = Also has an increased chances of becoming gay.

I am a post doc and I get this information through some journal and book search.
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Old 02-26-09, 12:34 PM
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Re: Gay Men/ADHD

ummm...it's Oppositional Defiant Disorder. Unless they've come up with a new name.
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