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Men with ADD/ADHD This forum is for men to discuss issues related to being a man with AD/HD.

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  #46  
Old 04-23-08, 12:15 PM
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Re: Sex and ADHD

Wow I was wondering that about ADD & Sex too! I remember masterbating early...& A lot! but I as well lost my virginity late, almost 20 (40 now) My Hubby & I have been going through that dip type thing where with 2- 3yr olds ya just dont have time or enough energy! We still have Sex but not 4 times a day any more! I am lucky to have found a man with as high a sex drive as me!!! & any time the kids do go to nanny's for a night we spend the night rockin it! We were together for 9 yrs before kids ...what an adjustment! I think it is the part that has been hardest for hubby since the kids, My Sex Drive has been down for a lot of reasons. (sleep deprivation, Financial stress, Job Stress, Marital stress,...did I mention 2 - 3yr olds.....& me newly diagnosed with ADD !!!) I find the Meds seem to help me get a bit of drive back tho. I just need to nail down the proper dosage!
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  #47  
Old 04-23-08, 01:38 PM
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Re: Sex and ADHD

Quote:
(sleep deprivation, Financial stress, Job Stress, Marital stress,...did I mention 2 - 3yr olds.....& me newly diagnosed with ADD !!!) I find the Meds seem to help me get a bit of drive back tho. I just need to nail down the proper dosage!
I have 2 boys age 2 &5..plus I am newly diagnosed and trying to get the right dose too! But hoo-eee somethings workin'! One time we thought the kids were alseep...so "Rock the Casba" was playin' if you know what I mean...and in comes 5 year old. LOL ....never happened before!
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  #48  
Old 04-23-08, 01:43 PM
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Re: Sex and ADHD

You got locks on the bedroom door?
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  #49  
Old 04-23-08, 01:59 PM
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Re: Sex and ADHD

Tracy,

So that's ONE SPECIAL 17 Y.O. DAUGHTER YOU GOT THERE, EH?????!!!! Heh heh. Any bright stars out on her birthday or anything? Heh heh.

In answer to your question, Amykins... I'm not sure if it's a phase, but I SURE hope it is, for both of our sakes...

Sandy
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  #50  
Old 04-27-08, 04:15 AM
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Re: Sex and ADHD

Quote:
can I call someone a whipper-snapper if I am 32?)
According to the whipper snapper law one must be 35+ or a woman over 30 expereincing PMS.

Sorry I couldn't resist. . .
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  #51  
Old 04-28-08, 11:25 AM
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Re: Sex and ADHD

Haha! I'm stoked you have such good and open sex lives with your spouses in long term relationships... I think it's great!

In terms of spicing it up... I mean, gosh, you don't have to go crazy but there must be new things you can try? What about things like reading erotic literature (the sexiest fantasy is the one you conjure up in your mind!), or visiting an adult shop? I think too being playful and having a good attitude is important. After all, it's about having fun and just enjoying being with each other.

I'd love to be in a relationship like that! And to do it as well as parenthood... my hat is off! Go sisters!
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  #52  
Old 04-28-08, 03:06 PM
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Re: Sex and ADHD

Quote:
Originally Posted by Amykins View Post
I have 2 boys age 2 &5..plus I am newly diagnosed and trying to get the right dose too! But hoo-eee somethings workin'! One time we thought the kids were alseep...so "Rock the Casba" was playin' if you know what I mean...and in comes 5 year old. LOL ....never happened before!
I know what thats like! When my daughter was about 3, the kids were asleep and shall we say the earth was moving really well. All of a sudden the wife screams!!!!!!! I come back to reality, and look over to the side of the bed. There stands my daughter, just tall enough for her eyes to just peek over the edge. She says in toddler speak "whatcha doin?" OMG!
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  #53  
Old 05-05-08, 07:05 PM
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Re: Sex and ADHD

In my experience, being an inattentive ADDer plays a significant role in my sex drive, which has been quite high from an early age.

It started out with masturbation, which I was pretty much addicted to since I was 6 or 7 through my 20s. I think this is a kind of self-medication. It's about the most stimulating, engaging activity I know of, and the endorphin/opiate rush at the end could help me get off my *** and get to work. Plus, it's a great way to make some persistent thoughts ("SEX! WOMEN! SEX! WOMEN!") go away for at least a little while.

And that's the other part of the issue. It's much harder to concentrate with a pretty woman in the room. I don't stare, but I can get a little obsessive about thinking about not thinking about it. Sometimes a quick trip to the bathroom to relieve that obsession is the only solution.

On the other hand, sex itself is not so easy because I'm so self-conscious and my mind does wander, and I feel terribly guilty thinking about someone other than my wife, but sometimes a great fantasy is the only way to arouse me enough to be able to finish.

In the last couple of years, fibromyalgia, depression and anti-depressants, and the cannabis I use to treat the FM have all contributed to a significantly lower sex drive. I suppose I'm just getting old, too (I'm 32). I am about to see a doctor about taking something for my ADD, which I suspect will be far more successful at helping my depression than antidepressants, and then maybe I can get a little of my mojo back.
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  #54  
Old 05-05-08, 10:05 PM
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Re: Sex and ADHD

I masturbated young too, about 5 or 6, and then I started doing it all day... at recess, and all evening until I went to bed if I had nothing else to do... I would watch movies down in our basement and grind the support pole while hanging on it with my arms... good exercise I imagine... maybe thats why I was so underweight! :P
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  #55  
Old 06-16-08, 04:33 PM
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Re: Sex and ADHD

This in regards to amkins and mom of twins.... I beleive that is were i saw the comment about the highs and lows. I forgot which one posted it but is was related to the 2 of the comments. I have been married for almost 8yrs. I noticed issues that developed about 9 months ago. It all just stopped. Everyone said i had adhd and no just 2 months ago got diagnosed with it. We were doing about 2 times a week, give or take more or less... depending of the 3 kids and jobs etc...I have always been the hypersexual one. Just wondering if it has to go with the 7 yr marriage thing, it i belelvie was related to the fact that she had had it with my undagnosed ADHD among other things related to it and it got to her and now we are trying to work it out. Is that common the 7yr up and down? I am still the same, wanting it all the time. I do believe it to be self medicating, like it has been said. I just hate to "nag" sometimes and then feel guilty or push my luck and get her more aggrivated more... ANy thought???
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  #56  
Old 06-19-08, 02:54 PM
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Re: Sex and ADHD

Does anyone else have this problem? I have a decent sex drive but it's the thought of spending a whole hour, doing the same thing, that turns me off. I won't sit down to watch an hour-long show, most of the time, because my ADD brain can't make that type of time commitment, and sex is the same way. So I love having sex with my girlfriend, but I rarely want to do it more than 2 or 3 times a week (she would do it twice a day or more, if she had her way). I didn't have this trouble when I was dating a lot of different women, but I find monogamy a bit understimulating, especially in the purely sexual department.

I think this problem could be solved two ways: (a) 10 minutes of sex, instead of an hour; (b) more women in my life. My girlfriend does not like either idea.

Seriously, does anyone else have trouble with the time commitment aspect of sex? Asking me to do anything for an hour is a good way to turn me off...
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  #57  
Old 07-04-08, 08:52 PM
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Re: Sex and ADHD

Eat more watermelon.
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  #58  
Old 07-05-08, 06:46 AM
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Re: Sex and ADHD

OMG!! You could set a timer.

10 minutes a day X 6 days equals 1 hour. Nothing wrong with that.

Hubby and I are 47 and 41, that part of our life is fine, actually it just seems to get better. he had some difficulty during the "Lexapro years" and I wasn't impressed with him much when he was drinking right b4 he got sober, but that's over with.

I'm old enough to call some of ya'll "whipper snappers"!! LOL

I just don't get the "cat thing"

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  #59  
Old 07-05-08, 09:42 AM
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Re: Sex and ADHD

I like to love my girlfriend 25 hours a day, and I think she is more horny than me... thank the maker she has ADHD and OCD like me! heehee
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  #60  
Old 12-14-08, 11:24 PM
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Re: Sex and ADHD

Quote:
Originally Posted by prtsimmons View Post
................... I won't sit down to watch an hour-long show, most of the time, because my ADD brain can't make that type of time commitment, and sex is the same way.
Sex for an hour!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!????????????????
This exists? I can imagine you're going crazy, but as I can gather your girlfr. seems to like it. I don't know if this will work for u but I'm trying to improvise here:
Try dicing sex up in to smaller sessions. In other words try spreading the preparation for the deed througout the day so she will already be in the "mood" when you finally get down to it (for ex.kissing other kinds of forplay in small sessions with pauses inbetween, building up to the eventual ' piece the resistance').

Because the mood will allready be set you wont have to work for 45 min. before u can "you know what" (excuse the choice of words,but this is not a private forum).

anyway good luck!
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