ADD Forums - Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder Support and Information Resources Community  

Go Back   ADD Forums - Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder Support and Information Resources Community > ADDForums FRONT OFFICE > New Member Introductions
Register Blogs FAQ Chat Members List Calendar Donate Gallery Arcade Mark Forums Read

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old 09-19-12, 11:22 PM
mellissabee's Avatar
mellissabee mellissabee is offline
Newbie
 

Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: British Columbia
Posts: 3
Thanks: 7
Thanked 2 Times in 2 Posts
mellissabee is on a distinguished road
New & Overwhelmed

I really hope I can find help here.
I'm a 30yr old Mom of 3 & I'm spiralling down into a dark hole. A dark, dark hole.

The thing is though, I have it all. I have an amazing husband, 3 beautiful little girls, a job I love, a beautiful home, amazing friendships, but I always end up depressed. And it looks like I'm headed that direction again.

My Dr always puts me on antidepressants, he says some people just have to be on them for the rest of their lives. However, antidepressants work for awhile and then I start getting depressed because its not fixing the problem. I'm still fighting the same things that make me depressed in the first place. I've been on & off of Antidepressants since I've been 16. I've talked to counsellors & i'm just waiting to go and see the Psychiatrist.

I was diagnosed ADD when I was a child but my mom never medicated me cause I wasn't hyperactive- but, I struggled with school.

I am desperate for help, I've been waiting for months to get into the Psychiatrist and who knows when I'll get in. How do I help myself?? I am not the person I want to be & I can feel myself losing sight of how beautiful life is.

Any insight would be appreciated! M
Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to mellissabee For This Useful Post:
MX2012 (09-20-12)
  #2  
Old 09-20-12, 12:14 AM
namazu's Avatar
namazu namazu is online now
Yeti-Wrangling Moderator
 
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Northern Hemisphere
Posts: 12,527
Thanks: 59,715
Thanked 18,428 Times in 9,097 Posts
namazu has a reputation beyond reputenamazu has a reputation beyond reputenamazu has a reputation beyond reputenamazu has a reputation beyond reputenamazu has a reputation beyond reputenamazu has a reputation beyond reputenamazu has a reputation beyond reputenamazu has a reputation beyond reputenamazu has a reputation beyond reputenamazu has a reputation beyond reputenamazu has a reputation beyond repute
Re: New & Overwhelmed

Hi Melissa,

"Overwhelmed" is an all-too-common, but...well, common...place to be.

Welcome to ADDF. I hope you'll find some comfort and/or ideas and/or support here while waiting to get in to see the doctor.

Hang in there!

- Namazu
Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to namazu For This Useful Post:
mellissabee (09-20-12)
  #3  
Old 09-20-12, 12:43 AM
MX2012's Avatar
MX2012 MX2012 is offline
Forum Guru
 

Join Date: May 2012
Location: Silver Spring, MD
Posts: 809
Thanks: 1,001
Thanked 685 Times in 405 Posts
MX2012 has much to be proud ofMX2012 has much to be proud ofMX2012 has much to be proud ofMX2012 has much to be proud ofMX2012 has much to be proud ofMX2012 has much to be proud ofMX2012 has much to be proud ofMX2012 has much to be proud ofMX2012 has much to be proud of
Re: New & Overwhelmed

I sympathize.

While I have experienced regular bouts of depression for most of my life, they were bouts, meaning there was a pattern to them. It got to the point where I could figure out the trigger or sense the depression coming.

I will say that often in the depths of those depressions I felt hopeless. Now, I hope what I am about to say is not considered dangerous. But, eventually, in order to have a sense of control over my life, I thought of suicide.

At first, I really meant it because it seemed like the only out. But, as I learned to deal with my depressions by researching food choices that would help alleviate the depression and trying a variety of activities to help. I slept alot. I stopped beating myself up. So, when it got bad, I thought of suicide again, but this time, I latched onto thinking about it because while I had decided that I would not kill myself, thinking about suicide gave me a feeling of control. I knew if I could just hang on the depression would lift but the thoughts of being able to control my life also helped lift the depression. I did take St. John's Wort and it did help. But, over the years, it lost its effectiveness and I felt that I was having side effects, so I stopped.

I do know people who suffer from severe depression, a depression much deeper, stronger and more long-lasting than mine. It does sound like you have managed to create a wonderful life. It also sounds like you would like to enjoy this life you created.

Do you journal? I found writing helpful. Write when you are happy, sad, introspective and depressed. Look back over your journals and scrapbooks and picture albums to remind you of the beautiful days. For me, when I began to see a repeating pattern in the way I thought when I was depressed, it reminded me that my brain was not functioning properly and it was not my fault.

It sounds trite to say but make a list of all the things you are grateful for -- I can't help but believe that it helps our brain to be reminded of all of our good traits, our skills, our family, our friends and more even though when depressed that joy is hard to find.
__________________
“At the ripe old age of 52 I attended my first conference on AD/HD….everyone around me was spilling coffee, losing their hotel key, and getting lost. I was home!” -AD/HD patient
(http://lifelistsblog.wordpress.com/2...uotes-on-adhd/)
Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to MX2012 For This Useful Post:
mellissabee (09-20-12)
Sponsored Links
  #4  
Old 09-20-12, 02:00 AM
SquarePeg SquarePeg is offline
ADDvanced Forum ADDvocate
 

Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: spain
Posts: 2,819
Thanks: 1,155
Thanked 2,996 Times in 1,531 Posts
SquarePeg has a reputation beyond reputeSquarePeg has a reputation beyond reputeSquarePeg has a reputation beyond reputeSquarePeg has a reputation beyond reputeSquarePeg has a reputation beyond reputeSquarePeg has a reputation beyond reputeSquarePeg has a reputation beyond reputeSquarePeg has a reputation beyond reputeSquarePeg has a reputation beyond reputeSquarePeg has a reputation beyond reputeSquarePeg has a reputation beyond repute
Re: New & Overwhelmed

Quote:
Originally Posted by mellissabee View Post

I'm still fighting the same things that make me depressed in the first place. I've been on & off of Antidepressants since I've been 16. I've talked to counsellors & i'm just waiting to go and see the Psychiatrist.
M
Hi Mellissa, you say you are still fighting the same things. Unresolved issues do not go away, you can push them down, cover them over, they may stay buried for a while, but they will always, always try and surface in some way until you deal with them. Buried emotions need a voice and will not stay quiet until they are "heard".

Having a lovey husband, kids, a "good" life , is no protection against depression, so don´t feel that you don´t have the right to be depressed and that you are somehow being ungrateful.

So I hope you get your therapy very soon and that it helps. I had 2 years of psychotherapy more than 25 years ago and no antidepressants and it was one of the best things I ever did for myself.

good luck x
Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to SquarePeg For This Useful Post:
mellissabee (09-20-12)
  #5  
Old 09-20-12, 11:11 AM
DvlsAdv0c8's Avatar
DvlsAdv0c8 DvlsAdv0c8 is offline
ADDvanced Contributor
 

Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: in the meadow ghetto
Posts: 623
Thanks: 1,536
Thanked 755 Times in 352 Posts
DvlsAdv0c8 is a splendid one to beholdDvlsAdv0c8 is a splendid one to beholdDvlsAdv0c8 is a splendid one to beholdDvlsAdv0c8 is a splendid one to beholdDvlsAdv0c8 is a splendid one to beholdDvlsAdv0c8 is a splendid one to beholdDvlsAdv0c8 is a splendid one to beholdDvlsAdv0c8 is a splendid one to behold
Re: New & Overwhelmed

Welcome to the forums! I hope you are able to find some help and relief here.
__________________
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"Not knowing everything is all that makes it OK sometimes." - Delirium
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"Face your fear, accept your war, it is what it is." - Black Label Society
Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to DvlsAdv0c8 For This Useful Post:
mellissabee (09-20-12)
  #6  
Old 09-20-12, 06:28 PM
mellissabee's Avatar
mellissabee mellissabee is offline
Newbie
 

Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: British Columbia
Posts: 3
Thanks: 7
Thanked 2 Times in 2 Posts
mellissabee is on a distinguished road
Re: New & Overwhelmed

Thank you all for your kind and thoughtful replys! I just feel like I'm always fighting myself and feeling like I'm my own problem. Im sure that will never benefit me in a good way!
This is all new to me, I've done very little research and kept this to myself for a long time. Which I'm sure has only made things worse. Anyways, I'm glad I found this site and I'm going to try to make good use of it!!
Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to mellissabee For This Useful Post:
namazu (09-25-12)
  #7  
Old 09-25-12, 01:00 AM
nanners's Avatar
nanners nanners is offline
Contributor
 

Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Central Coast, CA
Posts: 301
Thanks: 289
Thanked 243 Times in 140 Posts
nanners is a jewel in the roughnanners is a jewel in the roughnanners is a jewel in the rough
Re: New & Overwhelmed

You said you were never medicated as your mother did not feel you were hyperactive. Did you ever receive any sort of counseling or therapy? I am just wondering as I was not diagnosed as a child (was at 28 and now am 32). I also have three children, a great husband, etc...
I was diagnosed but wasn't given a lot of help otherwise. I have been going thru cycles of depression and I am beginning to understand that for me, it seems to stem from my feeling so bad about myself and that i can't "get it together"....
anyway, I am just finishing reading a book by a doctor that has ADHD herself. The book is meant just for women, and mostly for those who have "inattentive' ADD, rather than "hyper". I don't know if you have much time to read (I don't!) but I have been just gobbling this book down, as it supplies so much information that is helpful and explains a lot of my issues and gives good suggestions on how to take steps forward. I am not able to afford therapy at this time so this is the best I can do for the time being. Anyway, below are the book details. I hope this is somehow helpful. I just really relate and feel for you, as these dark times can be so difficult. Please remember that you are not alone nor are you the only one that feels this way...

Here is a link to a post regarding the first issue of the book:
http://www.addforums.com/forums/showthread.php?t=25449

I just got the new/updated E version on my Nook:
Author: Sari Solden
Title: Women With Attention Deficit Disorder: Embrace Your Differences and Transform Your Life
__________________
~keep your head up and your heart afloat~
Reply With Quote
  #8  
Old 09-25-12, 09:32 PM
someothertime's Avatar
someothertime someothertime is offline
mod-estly regulated
 

Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: sydney
Posts: 4,727
Blog Entries: 2
Thanks: 12,971
Thanked 5,446 Times in 2,991 Posts
someothertime has a reputation beyond reputesomeothertime has a reputation beyond reputesomeothertime has a reputation beyond reputesomeothertime has a reputation beyond reputesomeothertime has a reputation beyond reputesomeothertime has a reputation beyond reputesomeothertime has a reputation beyond reputesomeothertime has a reputation beyond reputesomeothertime has a reputation beyond reputesomeothertime has a reputation beyond reputesomeothertime has a reputation beyond repute
Re: New & Overwhelmed

If you can connect with peers ( who have had similar experiences ) face to face or online like you've done here, I think it would help a lot.
__________________
The goal is personally satisfying personal quality.
And to support other people in attaining their own personally satisfying personal quality.
And then to share.
~ SB_UK ~
Reply With Quote
  #9  
Old 09-25-12, 10:56 PM
silivrentoliel's Avatar
silivrentoliel silivrentoliel is offline
ADDvanced Forum ADDvocate
 

Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: the end of the road
Posts: 5,833
Blog Entries: 2
Thanks: 4,946
Thanked 6,302 Times in 3,471 Posts
silivrentoliel has a reputation beyond reputesilivrentoliel has a reputation beyond reputesilivrentoliel has a reputation beyond reputesilivrentoliel has a reputation beyond reputesilivrentoliel has a reputation beyond reputesilivrentoliel has a reputation beyond reputesilivrentoliel has a reputation beyond reputesilivrentoliel has a reputation beyond reputesilivrentoliel has a reputation beyond reputesilivrentoliel has a reputation beyond reputesilivrentoliel has a reputation beyond repute
Re: New & Overwhelmed

I totally understand overwhelmed... in fact, I'm pretty sure I was there tonight muking through receipts with DH...

Welcome to ADDF! You'll find a lot of great support here
__________________
dx: ADHD (1987), GAD (2012), Depression (2013), Cyclothymia (2013), & OSA (2014)

Follow ADDForums on Twitter & Facebook
Reply With Quote
  #10  
Old 10-02-12, 08:40 AM
Lunacie's Avatar
Lunacie Lunacie is online now
ADDvanced Forum ADDvocate
 

Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: south-central Kansas
Posts: 17,830
Thanks: 17,888
Thanked 23,876 Times in 11,051 Posts
Lunacie has a reputation beyond reputeLunacie has a reputation beyond reputeLunacie has a reputation beyond reputeLunacie has a reputation beyond reputeLunacie has a reputation beyond reputeLunacie has a reputation beyond reputeLunacie has a reputation beyond reputeLunacie has a reputation beyond reputeLunacie has a reputation beyond reputeLunacie has a reputation beyond reputeLunacie has a reputation beyond repute
Re: New & Overwhelmed

Research shows that meds plus therapy is more effective than either one alone.


Last year I did a class on CBT (cognitive behavior therapy) that gave me
a lot

of insight into why I react to things the way I do, what I'm thinking and how

that affects how I'm feeling.


For me, therapy is best in a group. It helps me to hear others ask

questions and bring up points that I'm too distracted to think of myself.


For some of us, finding out that our struggles are caused by a medical

condition called ADHD and not by our moral failure to try hard enough

is enough to stave off recurring depression.

For some the depression itself is a medical condition that needs to be

treated along with the ADHD.


I wish you the best in figuring out what will help you.
__________________
ADD is not a problem of knowing what to do; it is a problem of doing what you know.
-RUSSELL A. BARKLEY, PH.D.


As far as I know, there is nothing positive about ADHD that people can't have w out ADHD. ~ ADD me
Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to Lunacie For This Useful Post:
danelady (10-02-12)
  #11  
Old 10-02-12, 09:45 AM
T-Rex65's Avatar
T-Rex65 T-Rex65 is offline
ADDvanced Contributor
 

Join Date: May 2011
Location: athens, ga
Posts: 557
Thanks: 230
Thanked 530 Times in 294 Posts
T-Rex65 is a name known to allT-Rex65 is a name known to allT-Rex65 is a name known to allT-Rex65 is a name known to allT-Rex65 is a name known to allT-Rex65 is a name known to all
Re: New & Overwhelmed

I have a good life, too, and I struggle with depression. Sometimes I think some parts of my good life are being wasted on me, because I don't fully enjoy what I have. Don't beat yourself up for feeling that way. It just is what it is.
Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Complete and Utterly Overwhelmed Rollercoaster MIDWESTWOMAN General ADD Talk 3 04-10-12 03:44 PM
Lately getting overwhelmed and losing focus? FlGirl2011 Adderall 13 05-05-11 12:12 AM
Still get pretty overwhelmed Impetus General ADD Talk 13 11-12-10 12:53 AM
I'm confused and overwhelmed angora General ADD Talk 3 06-02-10 10:13 AM
Is anyone else overwhelmed by their young children? ohhmama Women with ADD/ADHD 37 12-11-08 01:51 AM


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 12:10 AM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.7.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2017, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
(c) 2003 - 2015 ADD Forums