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Old 11-05-19, 06:49 PM
Clstlg Clstlg is offline
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Security...hoodie?

My daughter has ADHD and social anxiety. She is 12 and in middle school.

She has been wearing a heavy weight hoodie to school for about a year now...all seasons. It's getting pretty ratty, but when I suggest that she not wear it she protests rather vehemently. It has become her security blanket, of sorts.

We are trying to come up with an alternative to the hoodie. She says the weight on her shoulders is comforting to her, and I suspect it is a way to cover her maturing body as well.

Does anyone have any ideas of ways to move past the hoodie?
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Old 11-05-19, 06:55 PM
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Re: Security...hoodie?

Let her pick out a new one or two. or, keep the old one clean. She'll move on to something else when she wants to.
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Old 11-05-19, 10:43 PM
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Re: Security...hoodie?

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Originally Posted by Little Missy View Post
Let her pick out a new one or two. or, keep the old one clean. She'll move on to something else when she wants to.
absolutely yes! at 51 I have many items which are comfortable and make me feel "safe". including a zip-up hoodie. and also capes and a fuzzy coat.
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Old 11-06-19, 12:09 PM
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Re: Security...hoodie?

Weighted vests, lap pads, and blankets serve much the same purpose.
My adult daughter finds the weight soothing, I do not.

Maybe a lighter jacket/vest with weighted bean bags in the pockets?
Everyone is wearing hoodies these days, even me, a 68 year old gramma.


Is she taking meds for the anxiety? Seeing a therapist? I need the meds
and found the therapy helpful. Wish I'd gotten them started at age 12
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Old 11-13-19, 12:21 PM
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Re: Security...hoodie?

I have suggested multiple hoodies, but she is resistant. I'll try again.

She is not on meds for her anxiety, but it is on our list of things to go over with our new doctor. She had counseling in elementary school and we are discussing therapy in the future, but again...she is resistant.

I'm still just trying to get this all figured out. I thought I had it well in hand and then the tweens hit and I'm working on getting this all figured out again.

Thank you for your help.
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Old 11-13-19, 07:45 PM
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Re: Security...hoodie?

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Originally Posted by Clstlg View Post
I have suggested multiple hoodies, but she is resistant. I'll try again.

She is not on meds for her anxiety, but it is on our list of things to go over with our new doctor. She had counseling in elementary school and we are discussing therapy in the future, but again...she is resistant.

I'm still just trying to get this all figured out. I thought I had it well in hand and then the tweens hit and I'm working on getting this all figured out again.

Thank you for your help.
OMG the tweens! We were dealing with autism, anxiety, and a bully of a
school teacher. So ODD was part of the mix in her tweens (Oppositional
Defiant Disorder). A couple years growth and a move to a different school
made a world of difference in her ability to deal with life. She took anxiety
meds through the whole thing and has not made any fuss about taking so
many meds (also diabetic and insomniac).

If your girl is not willing to trade in the old ratty hoodie for a new one, guess
she knows what she needs, or thinks she does. Maybe if someone besides
Mom took her shopping, ya know, someone really coooool, she might pick
one out. Meanwhile hang in there and good luck.
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Old 11-14-19, 03:19 AM
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Re: Security...hoodie?

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Originally Posted by Clstlg View Post
I have suggested multiple hoodies, but she is resistant. I'll try again.
Well, I can't say for her, but I do have an "identity hoodies", and I'm also resistant to replace it. Even when I lost my original grey one (which was bought by my mother) in an internet cafe, I tried to buy a new identical one. Got what I wanted but the closest color to grey which was available at the time was creme. So I bought it as my "new" identity hoodies. It's now being ratty, very ratty due to my few adventures in some beaches and mountains as well as a single traffic accident. Even so, I still want to buy an identical one to replace it. Maybe your daughter thinks similar (though I may be wrong) in that her hoodies already screams "This is me!" as part of our "default" outfit. If so, my suggestion is to buy her an identical one.
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