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  #1  
Old 10-18-04, 05:27 PM
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grapegoat grapegoat is offline
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Smile the grapegoat story (long)

I finally have gotten around to getting involved with these forums. And I have avoided them for one reason or another for so long! Whew! About time!

I was 33 the last time I checked, and I seem to have contracted me a good case of ADD/ADHD at birth or slightly before. ADD/ADHD has helped me maintain a minimum level of havoc, turmoil and chaos in my life throughout my years, which without I would not be the same person. I was diagnosed at the tender age of 24 or 25 when I was a sophmore in college. I was not, as one counselor quickly learned, "just not smart enough" to be in a four-year college.

Given that I never was any good at talking to people about ADHD, I didn't really do my part in educating my fiancee about any ADHD related needs I might have. And by the time that such communication was critical, I didn't really feel like I deserved for anyone to even be nice to me, let alone make room for a disability. It wasn't a fun place to be and I have been known to be a bit grumpy or frustrated from time to time. I made up a funny little story about how we deal with each other when we "grow horns". It is probably a better introduction ;-)

--steve (aka grape or grapegoat)

Grape got really grumpy one day. He got grumpy about something he couldn't change, which we all know is kind of silly. He got even grumpier because he is afraid of looking like a fool in front of other people, even if the only other person is his fiancee Lorri that he loves so much. So, like shaking a can of grape soda before you open it, our friend Grape got really, really grumpy at himself and at the thing that he couldn't control to start with. He had been grumpy and frustrated plenty of times before, just like this, but this time something was a little bit different. Something was changing, but he wasn't quite sure what it was because he was too busy pouting and stomping and snorting about that silly little something that he clearly knew that he couldn't change. And Grape really hates it, even more than when Fred the Squirrel steals all of the bird seed out of the bird feedeers, if life starts pulling sneaky surprises on him like that!

Now, Grape was pitching a fit. He was pouting and stomping and snorting all around the house, but after some time Grape began to get a little bored with pouting and stomping and snorting. He stomped and snorted his way on over to the mirror just to make sure his grumpy face was as mean and ferocious and grumpy as it could possibly be. His face was mean all right, really mean. He was downright scary! He was in the early stages of turning into a grumpgoat! But he didn't even care. He didn't even care if he was starting to look like a grumpgoat. He was far too grumpy for silly little things like that! He even said that he didn't care about anything at all. At least that's what he said. Although from time to time those silly grumpgoats don't mind telling a little fib about how grumpy they really are. It is just part of being a grumpgoat. They like to make things look far worse than they really are, and they are pretty darned good at it too.

So he just snorted and stomped off because he knew with all of his heart and soul that he didn't have time to waste on anything other than pouting and snorting and stomping around the house. He had even grown some scraggly little grumpgoat hairs on his chin. A set of pointy little grumpgoat ears appeared on the top of his head that would wiggle as he stomped and snorted. Lorri even told him that she thought his new ears were kind of cute, but she didn't get a smile out of him. It actually made him at least ten times grumpier because grumpgoats hate being called cute more than anything else in the world. He was very determined to be mean and ugly and grumpy! And so he just kept on pouting and stomping and snorting and he didn't stop for a long, long time. What that grumpgoat didn't know was that the whole time he was so busy pouting and stomping and snorting around the house, his cute little grumpgoat ears grew to be rather ugly full-sized grumpgoat ears. He was even beginning to feel two little grumpgoat horns poking out through the top of his head right next to his big ugly grumpgoat ears. He didn't even look behind him once, because if he had, he would have noticed that he had even begun grow a grumpgoat's tail!

Even though he noticed some of these strange things happening to him, he absolutely refused to do anything but continue to pout and stomp and snort around the house, even though he had long forgotten what on earth it was that he had gotten so grumpy about in the first place. He just kept on pouting and stomping and snorting with all his might just like every stubborn old grumpgoat does. There wasn't a thing he would say or do to change it. Not that he cared, of course, he just kept on pouting and stomping and snorting about that thing that he couldn't remember a thing about apart from the fact that he couldn't change it. Unfortunately by this point Grape had already pouted and stomped and snorted around the house so much and for so long that he was no longer acting like a grumpgoat. He had turned into an ugly, snorting, stomping grumpgoat. Even worse, the longer that he pouted and stomped and snorted, the bigger and taller his horns would grow. It wasn't too much longer before his horns were touching the ceiling. He even noticed that his head was starting to get heavy and his big ugly ears were starting to itch very much like they would itch if he hadn't taken a bath in five weeks. He was starting to think twice about being a grumpgoat.

Only after his horns reached the ceiling and his ugly grumpgoat ears were itching did he begin wondering what was happening to him. He was afraid that he might be stuck as a grumpgoat for the rest of his life and that they might not be able to cut off those huge horns. He wouldn't be able to play with his friends or go skateboarding in the middle of the night! He didn't want to be a grumpgoat for the rest of his life. He wanted to have a happy heart. He didn't want to be grumpy any more. And besides, who ever wanted to hug a mean, stinky old grumpgoat who couldn't even remember why he was grumpy in the first place? He started to feel alone and started to feel bad aboput all of the trouble and commotion he had caused by pouting and stomping and snorting around the house for so long. He just wanted hugs. He didn't want to be a grumpgoat. He really just wanted to be told that everything was O.K., that he was safe and that he didn't have to be scared any more. You see, deep down inside he was really just scared. He never intended to do harm.

So that grumpgoat sat there and cried those big sad grumpgoat tears that grumpgoats cry when they are feeling sad and helpless. He thought about what he had done and how he really didn't mean to cause any problems. He really didn't! He was really just a happy-go-lucky Grape at heart, not a mean-spirited old grumpgoat. He had to find out what it would take to make those awful horns go away, not to mention the big ugly ears and short stubby tail! He thought and thought for what seemed like grumpgoat hours, which roughly translates into slightly more than ninety minutes on your average wall clock.

Well, that mean old grumpgoat had finally started to figure it all out. Even though you might think it is strange, all that grumpgoat needed to do was to think a little more like you average barnyard billy goat! So, what is it that billy goats do when they aren't trying to get out of the fence and into the garden? They eat grass in the pasture and chew their cud for hours and hours. There was only one thing to do now. The grumpgoat needed to be put out to pasture. The grumpgoat needed the space to dream while he was chewing his cud. Out to pasture is where all goats belong, and that night Lorri sent her grumpgoat off to chew his cud and dream his dreams. Of course in the process of going out to pasture he refused to go, so she dragged him by his long and pointy grumpgoat horns until he finally gave up. Eventually he realized that he really didn't want to be a grumpgoat and managed to find his own way out to pasture. Unfortunately, that's usually the way it has to be for grumpgoats. They have big hearts, but they are incredibly stubborn creatures. They can't help it either. They were born that way. By the time Grape woke up in the morning there was no sign of a grumpgoat anywhere in the house and it was a good, new day.

Get this story in it's current incarnation

Last edited by clawless; 10-18-04 at 05:52 PM.. Reason: removal of link, insufficient post as per forum guide lines
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Old 10-18-04, 06:06 PM
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clawless clawless is offline
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Hello and welcome to the forum steve
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Old 10-18-04, 06:36 PM
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That was a great story but I do have to comment on one thing........

And I could be wrong on this as I was not raised on a Billy Goat farm

Up here in Canada its cows that chew their cud but I dont know for sure about Billy Goats

I am certainly open to being educated on this if any body would happen to know

I just called my sister who lives on a Billy Goat farm and her daughter, my niece I guess she is, says that Billy Goats do indeed chew there cud so now I have learned my new thing for the day
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Old 10-18-04, 10:09 PM
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grapegoat grapegoat is offline
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Garry, You had me running scared there for a minute! I have always had this mental image of a particular goat we had on the farm when I was a kid (no pun intended) looking at me eye to eye just chewing away with a very distracted and distant look on his face very much like the goat chewing his cud on the wikipedia.

Cheers,

Steve

Last edited by grapegoat; 10-18-04 at 10:12 PM.. Reason: oops... link guidelines....
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Old 10-18-04, 11:43 PM
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Welcome Steve!

I LOVED your story! Are you a writer? Or is writing just something you do when you put out to pasture all by your grumpy self?
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Old 10-19-04, 12:05 AM
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Old 10-19-04, 12:39 AM
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grapegoat welcome to the forums. A Gentoo user too? cool!
ian
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Old 10-19-04, 04:51 PM
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Old 10-19-04, 10:56 PM
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Hi and hugs welcome to the fourms...I Hope you'll be happy here
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Old 10-20-04, 12:21 PM
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grapegoat,
Hi my name is Jim and I am part of the ADD Forums Welcoming Committee. On Behalf of ADD Forums, we would like to extend a warm welcome to our community.


If you have any questions or need any help at the forums please feel free send me a private message (pm).

Also when you get a chance Please be sure to read the Forums Guidelines http://www.addforums.com/forums/for...daysprune=&f=75

In addition to the standard message boards, ADD Forums also offers a chat room, which is open 24/7 and available to all registered members (that means you!). In addition to being open 24/7, we also have hosted scheduled chats almost every night. You can access the chat room by clicking "Chat" on the control bar at the top of your screen, and see the times for scheduled chats under "Calendar".

In the event that I'm not available when you are at the forums, Please feel free to pm any of the Moderators (top of the Forums home page in green) or any of the Admins (names are bold at the top of Forums home page in red)) They will be more than happy to help you.


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Old 10-20-04, 07:38 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by itschaotic
grapegoat welcome to the forums. A Gentoo user too? cool!
ian
Whats Gentoo
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Old 10-25-04, 03:58 PM
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Gentoo is a source-based Linux distro designed for maximum flexibility, which can be quite powerfull, timeconsuming and frustrating. Depending on the day, of course. It can be simple or complex depending on how you approach it and what your needs are.
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