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Careers/Job Impact This forum is for adults to discuss how AD/HD affects work and career.

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  #1  
Old 02-02-14, 02:23 PM
ischmaael ischmaael is offline
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There's something wrong with you. Here's some more suspension days to fix it.

My bosses keep telling me "there's something wrong." They've written me up 5x in the last 3 months for missing little things. They call it "poor decision making" when I miss instructions, mis-check a box, etc. I'm going through menopause, which seems to have skyrocketed my adhd tendencies, and made it so that all the things that worked all these years no longer work. So now, they keep disciplining me even though they admit they thing there "is something wrong." That seems very, very wrong to me. I was moved out of my position last week, and they are threatening to take away my supervision role and to fire me if I don't improve. I've had testing done, but I can't tell them that. I should get the results next week. I won't be able to take medication, due to my job. I'm really getting depressed. I've been going to a counselor (who also has adhd) and doing absolutely everything I'm told, except that i'm haviing a hard time exercising enough. The stress is just growing, and they can't understand that by calling me into the office and chewing me out every week they are increasing the stress which increases the liklihood of mistakes. I don't know what to do and I feel like such a failure at this point. I've never been able to NOT find a coping mechanism or a tool that worked. Does anyone know if there is any thing I can cite to my HR department to get them to back off while I work on this, and stop diciplining me for a health issue, so I can get things settled down? I'm afraid to tell them the diagnosis, (which I'm sure I'll be given next week.) I'm afraid that they will say my diagnosis is not compatible with my job. I feel so alone in all of this.
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  #2  
Old 02-02-14, 05:21 PM
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Re: There's something wrong with you. Here's some more suspension days to fix it.

are you being evaluated for ADD/ADHD? or are you diagnosed already? why can't you take medication due to your job, that right there is wrong!

I have found this to be a very critical, but often overlooked area in treating women with ADD (ADHD). I often hear from women who report that as they enter perimenopause and the "flashes" begin, they have more problems with their ADD (ADHD) symptoms or that their stimulant medication does not seem to be working as well as it did previously.
http://www.addvance.com/help/women/hormones.html
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Old 02-02-14, 05:43 PM
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Re: There's something wrong with you. Here's some more suspension days to fix it.

Yeah the not being able to take meds due to job I don't get either.

Also I'm pretty sure it would be against the law for them to fire you because of having ADHD. I think other people have advice about disclosing, I've seen threads about it come up before.
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Old 02-02-14, 05:59 PM
dvdnvwls dvdnvwls is offline
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Re: There's something wrong with you. Here's some more suspension days to fix it.

My post here is very opinionated. I happen to think it's correct and complete. I may be wrong, and it would be a blessing if I was.

But here goes...

"HR department" means "firing department". It's as simple as that - that's the only reason they exist. Stay away from them, and do not tell them anything at all unless you have absolutely no choice. Like on the TV cop shows, "anything you say can and will be used against you".
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Old 02-02-14, 06:19 PM
janiew janiew is offline
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Re: There's something wrong with you. Here's some more suspension days to fix it.

It can be hard to call it like it is... And you have to deal with the powers that be...
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Old 02-02-14, 06:21 PM
janiew janiew is offline
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Re: There's something wrong with you. Here's some more suspension days to fix it.

Quote:
Originally Posted by janiew View Post
It can be hard to call it like it is... And you have to deal with the powers that be...
Big smiley...
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Old 02-02-14, 06:46 PM
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Re: There's something wrong with you. Here's some more suspension days to fix it.

Sounds like bad leadership for starters. Why can you not take medication?
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Old 02-02-14, 08:52 PM
mischaelman mischaelman is offline
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Re: There's something wrong with you. Here's some more suspension days to fix it.

Is your doctor and/or counselor aware of the situation? If they are not, you should notify them immediately.

At least one of these people should be able to advise you and act as an advocate. If they are unable to assist you in this matter, they should refer you to someone who can act as an advocate on your behalf.

The longer this continues, the less chance you have of salvaging it. Under ADA, if the employer is unaware of a disability and how it is impacting job performance, they are able to discipline and fire. The employer admitting something is wrong is not enough. You need to get medical documentation (preferably something that does not disclose your diagnosis) and advice from a knowledgeable advocate ASAP.

Consider starting with your state's resources for disability employment law.

Knowing the law and your companies' policies are a good starting point to finding a solution with the HR department.
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Old 02-02-14, 08:57 PM
janiew janiew is offline
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Re: There's something wrong with you. Here's some more suspension days to fix it.

Bad leadership.

Some reality testing to figure out who / what / why.

Not all pdocs and counselors are equal...
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Old 02-04-14, 09:02 PM
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Re: There's something wrong with you. Here's some more suspension days to fix it.

I think you should talk to a disability lawyer asap if you can afford one. Make sure you check their credentials cause some lawyers are better than others.

Your case sounds very unique and people here can't really give good advice without knowing the specifics (which I can understand why you might not want to share on a public forum). Plus advice from any board, as fantastic as this board is, you always need to take with a grain of salt cause they don't know you and you don't know them.

By the way, you aren't alone even if it feels like you are. We understand and are all there with you.

Last edited by acdc01; 02-04-14 at 09:17 PM..
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Old 02-04-14, 11:47 PM
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Re: There's something wrong with you. Here's some more suspension days to fix it.

Yes, they do know how much stress it adds and they know it will cause you to make more mistakes. They're calling you in to create a paper trail. They won't mind if you quit and are getting ready to lower the boom.

Really withaout diagnosis you don't have anything, with a diagnosis they can still get around it. I've checked, people with ADHD lose discrimination law suits. Judges moralize our symptoms.. go figure

NEVER tell HR or anyone you're employed with your diagnosis, Legally they are not allowed to ask, any accomodations are put forth by a doctor and you have to follow the protocols they set in place. All they need to know is you have a recognised disability and what accomodations you're requesting.
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Old 02-05-14, 12:28 AM
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Re: There's something wrong with you. Here's some more suspension days to fix it.

http://www.tn.gov/labor-wfd/faq_laws.shtml
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Old 02-05-14, 05:50 AM
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Re: There's something wrong with you. Here's some more suspension days to fix it.

F**k them. Get meds, document with your own personal dated notes and document everything with the counselor. Make sure he or she writes and dates everything. Once you have a diagnosis see a lawyer so when they fire you, you have a paper trail. Maybe ask the lawyer about accomodations but until you are ready to walk into HR armed with knowledge and evidence, dont say anything.
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