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  #16  
Old 09-05-17, 05:44 AM
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Re: How to handle a meeting with the president

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Originally Posted by anonymouslyadd View Post
Get this: I reached out to the guy who hired me a few days ago. He was let go about two months ago. I mentioned to him that I was struggling at the job.

He told me a ton of things that had been happening behind the scenes there. He said the CFO lives in a make believe world where everything is fine and dandy and if you mention anything that opposes that view, you're deemed negative. He also said my pseudo-boss was a tyrant and a butt-kisser, who was in over her head.

I don't know that he really helped me other than give me some insight on how things really worked there. I still need to make this job last until I find better, consistent work.
So why is your tyrant psuedoboss singling you out?

Maybe your ex coworker can act as a good reference for you.
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  #17  
Old 09-05-17, 09:34 AM
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Re: How to handle a meeting with the president

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So why is your tyrant psuedoboss singling you out?

Maybe your ex coworker can act as a good reference for you.
Try and take what he says carefully as he no longer works there. Even if some of its true, he still has the former employee perspective.
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  #18  
Old 09-07-17, 10:36 PM
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Re: How to handle a meeting with the president

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Try and take what he says carefully as he no longer works there. Even if some of its true, he still has the former employee perspective.
Good point. However, I think he's a fairly good source, considering how high he was up on the corporate ladder.
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Old 09-08-17, 09:33 AM
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Re: How to handle a meeting with the president

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Good point. However, I think he's a fairly good source, considering how high he was up on the corporate ladder.
I'd believe there's truth in what he says. I'd also think he might possibly be exaggerating the truth given he must be disgruntled.

Regardless, I wonder if your pseudo boss is targeting you for reasons that if you continue the way you are acting at this job, will open you to being targeted in future jobs?

Like your excoworker who says the CFO can't handle anyone who says anything that suggests a company isn't doing fine and dandy. Reality is, every company I've been to wants their employees to pretend everything is fine and dandy. And if you don't act that way, then you are considered negative.

I'm not saying put a fake smile and nod your head all the time. Just maybe call the whole truth out. You mentioned a bunch of good things you liked about your company earlier, next time maybe mention those good things too in public to your coworkers. Then be careful how you phrase suggestions for improvements.

I actually don't know if that an issue for you. But I do wonder if you are doing something that makes you a target to people who like finding targets.
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  #20  
Old 09-08-17, 10:50 AM
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Re: How to handle a meeting with the president

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I'd believe there's truth in what he says. I'd also think he might possibly be exaggerating the truth given he must be disgruntled.

Regardless, I wonder if your pseudo boss is targeting you for reasons that if you continue the way you are acting at this job, will open you to being targeted in future jobs?
I wouldn't say that I'm being targeted. She seems to be like this with everyone. I'm probably the most innovative of the group and stand out. This makes me a natural target.
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Like your excoworker who says the CFO can't handle anyone who says anything that suggests a company isn't doing fine and dandy. Reality is, every company I've been to wants their employees to pretend everything is fine and dandy. And if you don't act that way, then you are considered negative.
The president said that I was being negative about the boss, not in general matters. It was said that I was talking poorly about her.
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I'm not saying put a fake smile and nod your head all the time. Just maybe call the whole truth out. You mentioned a bunch of good things you liked about your company earlier, next time maybe mention those good things too in public to your coworkers. Then be careful how you phrase suggestions for improvements.

I actually don't know if that an issue for you. But I do wonder if you are doing something that makes you a target to people who like finding targets.
Good idea, and I've made it a point to recognize our accomplishments and how we've improved.

I've resolved to not do all the extra that I used to do, because I cannot perform the job to her satisfaction level. I know it seems like I'm being spiteful. I'm actually trying to survive and while doing so, I've learned one very important thing: always be tactful when raising an issue or don't raise it at all.
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  #21  
Old 09-09-17, 05:39 AM
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Re: How to handle a meeting with the president

The Emperor's New Clothes comes to mind here.

The woman is like this with everyone but you were the only to speak up. If you had been quiet and not said anything to anybody, you wouldn't have been called negative by your co-workers nor called into the BB's office for saying something to the PB.

Everything is good as long no one tells the truth about what is going on!
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  #22  
Old 09-11-17, 11:42 AM
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Re: How to handle a meeting with the president

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Originally Posted by finallyfound10 View Post
The Emperor's New Clothes comes to mind here.

The woman is like this with everyone but you were the only to speak up. If you had been quiet and not said anything to anybody, you wouldn't have been called negative by your co-workers nor called into the BB's office for saying something to the PB.

Everything is good as long no one tells the truth about what is going on!
Good point. This is really about knowing when to just nod your head and smile and when you are better off speaking up if you disagree with simething. 80% of the time if not more, the answer is to nod your head.

No matter how tactful you are, sometimes it's better to just not say anything at all. This isn't just about saying something bad about someone else which you should never do. But control freaks like people who think the same as they do so if you have an idea that might remotely be contrary to the norm, sometimes it's not worth speaking at all, not just with her but possibly with others as well. It's not just control freaks really, people trust people who think the same as they do.

So I say, pick your battles wisely. Some battles, even if you win them will cost you so much damage you will ultimately lose the war.
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  #23  
Old 09-15-17, 10:41 PM
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Re: How to handle a meeting with the president

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No matter how tactful you are, sometimes it's better to just not say anything at all. This isn't just about saying something bad about someone else which you should never do. But control freaks like people who think the same as they do so if you have an idea that might remotely be contrary to the norm, sometimes it's not worth speaking at all, not just with her but possibly with others as well. It's not just control freaks really, people trust people who think the same as they do.
I agree. I haven't talked during our last two meetings, and I won't be talking for a long time. You're right.
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So I say, pick your battles wisely. Some battles, even if you win them will cost you so much damage you will ultimately lose the war.
I've decided not to battle anymore. It's not worth the energy, and I can't meet my boss' needs while putting in all that extra effort.
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  #24  
Old 09-16-17, 02:40 PM
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Re: How to handle a meeting with the president

I just talked to my old boss, the one who hired me. It probably seems like he's just some disgruntled employee. Apparently, the pseudo-boss can do no wrong in the eyes of the CFO and president.

For instance, he said that the pseudo-boss would send disrespectful emails to him. When he brought it up to upper management, they sided with her. They sided with the pseudo-boss and told my boss, who was a VP, that they could see her point.

Instead of taking responsibility for her own actions she finds things she doesn't like and is relentless in trying to "fix" them.

She's always talking about being positive. Why? Why does she have to preach about being positive all of the time? In her unconscious mind, she must really feel the negativity of our environment or at least in her own mind. Otherwise, why the obsession with being positive?

I'm learning to appreciate the dynamics here and believe I can grow from it. I'm fascinated the psychological dynamics at play here.
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  #25  
Old 09-16-17, 06:27 PM
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Re: How to handle a meeting with the president

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Originally Posted by anonymouslyadd View Post
I just talked to my old boss, the one who hired me. It probably seems like he's just some disgruntled employee. Apparently, the pseudo-boss can do no wrong in the eyes of the CFO and president.

For instance, he said that the pseudo-boss would send disrespectful emails to him. When he brought it up to upper management, they sided with her. They sided with the pseudo-boss and told my boss, who was a VP, that they could see her point.

Instead of taking responsibility for her own actions she finds things she doesn't like and is relentless in trying to "fix" them.

She's always talking about being positive. Why? Why does she have to preach about being positive all of the time? In her unconscious mind, she must really feel the negativity of our environment or at least in her own mind. Otherwise, why the obsession with being positive?

I'm learning to appreciate the dynamics here and believe I can grow from it. I'm fascinated the psychological dynamics at play here.
Office politics is absolutely insane. And we are the ones deemed "mentally ill".
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  #26  
Old 09-16-17, 08:22 PM
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Re: How to handle a meeting with the president

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Office politics is absolutely insane. And we are the ones deemed "mentally ill".
The fact that they didn't take a step back and give an honest assessment on the reality of the situation is scary. I've had five bosses since I've been there, and she's the first one I've had an issue with. Why wouldn't they ask the following: "Why now?" or "What's going on?"
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Old 09-16-17, 11:20 PM
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Re: How to handle a meeting with the president

It's amazing to me how management/bosses think and act.

I think they really just want peace even if it's fake and only looks good on the surface but right underneath the surface is a poisonous broth.
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Old 09-25-17, 11:59 PM
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Re: How to handle a meeting with the president

The issues with being positive/negative make sense now. My boss is so concerned with being positive that things must really be bad.
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Old 10-11-17, 11:04 PM
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Re: How to handle a meeting with the president

I gave my two weeks and am looking forward to a new experience.
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Old 10-11-17, 11:07 PM
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Re: How to handle a meeting with the president

Best wishes in your next endeavor!
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