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Old 08-16-17, 11:31 PM
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How not to let procrastination affect people's opinion of you

There are 2 steps to a task. First is for me to complete the design.

Second is to give it to a technician to finalize it. When I know a technician isn't going to be able to start my project until late, I can't get myself to finish mypart until right before he starts his part cause I know I'm not affecting the critical path timeline. And I can't not know his schedule.

The problem is, another designer who's my counterpart will finish well in advance of when the tech can start his part.

The tech end up not being able to start their part until after the orginal 1st draft due date. So both mine and the other designers 1st draft products end up not being completed until say 2 days late. The final products always go out on time for both of us. So we both made the client equally happy and we both met the same schedules.

Theoretically since both our products were finished on the same days you might think the opinions of our performance would be the same, but these days it's not.

Because the other designer finished his part so early, it's not seen as his fault that the 1st draft product was late even though it makes absolutely zero difference in the time schedules that he finished his part so early. He actually looks good cause he was so ahead even though that extra time was useless.

I on the other hand am now burned out to the point where I can't finish more than a day before the technician is going to start. This makes people nervous and upset I'm cutting things so close even though I always meet the same schedule. And if I mention that the techs were busy then they would see me using the techs as an excuse for me finishing my part so late.

It's just a miserable feeling when you know you are producing the same products to the same quality (sometimes better) and schedule and yet the perception is so vastly different.

And I absolutely cannot finish way in advance of when the techs can start like my nt coworker.

I actually wrote in my accommodations that I'm supposed to have access to a tech when needed. So theoreticslly, if I need the tech to start earlier on my stuff I should get it. But my boss has zero control over the techs so can't get them to start on my stuff earlier. I would have to switch to another supervisor to get techs to start my stuff earlier. The higher up wanted me in this particular group due to my area of expertise so there might be a little disappointed if I switched. Plus the techs would not be happy.

What do you guys think I should do to keep up people's opinions of me? It's just a miserable feeling when you know you are producing the same products to the same quality (sometimes better) and schedule and yet the perception is so vastly different.
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Old 08-17-17, 12:56 AM
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Re: How not to let procrastination affect people's opinion of you

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It's just a miserable feeling when you know you are producing the same products to the same quality (sometimes better) and schedule and yet the perception is so vastly different.
I don't have an answer for that one. It sounds like you cannot win. I'm spinning my wheels trying to figure out how to handle it.

What type of feedback have you been receiving? What's the incentive of your NT coworker to finish is faster? Is he getting anything out of it?
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Old 08-17-17, 05:37 AM
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Re: How not to let procrastination affect people's opinion of you

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Originally Posted by acdc01 View Post
There are 2 steps to a task. First is for me to complete the design.

Second is to give it to a technician to finalize it. When I know a technician isn't going to be able to start my project until late, I can't get myself to finish mypart until right before he starts his part cause I know I'm not affecting the critical path timeline. And I can't not know his schedule.

The problem is, another designer who's my counterpart will finish well in advance of when the tech can start his part.

The tech end up not being able to start their part until after the orginal 1st draft due date. So both mine and the other designers 1st draft products end up not being completed until say 2 days late. The final products always go out on time for both of us. So we both made the client equally happy and we both met the same schedules.

Theoretically since both our products were finished on the same days you might think the opinions of our performance would be the same, but these days it's not.

Because the other designer finished his part so early, it's not seen as his fault that the 1st draft product was late even though it makes absolutely zero difference in the time schedules that he finished his part so early. He actually looks good cause he was so ahead even though that extra time was useless.

I on the other hand am now burned out to the point where I can't finish more than a day before the technician is going to start. This makes people nervous and upset I'm cutting things so close even though I always meet the same schedule. And if I mention that the techs were busy then they would see me using the techs as an excuse for me finishing my part so late.

It's just a miserable feeling when you know you are producing the same products to the same quality (sometimes better) and schedule and yet the perception is so vastly different.

And I absolutely cannot finish way in advance of when the techs can start like my nt coworker.

I actually wrote in my accommodations that I'm supposed to have access to a tech when needed. So theoreticslly, if I need the tech to start earlier on my stuff I should get it. But my boss has zero control over the techs so can't get them to start on my stuff earlier. I would have to switch to another supervisor to get techs to start my stuff earlier. The higher up wanted me in this particular group due to my area of expertise so there might be a little disappointed if I switched. Plus the techs would not be happy.

What do you guys think I should do to keep up people's opinions of me? It's just a miserable feeling when you know you are producing the same products to the same quality (sometimes better) and schedule and yet the perception is so vastly different.
What do I think about people's opinions of me? I give it zero space in my head. Maybe a boss, I would care about, and if that boss had some notes for me on my performance I would obviously meet those expectations but as far as everyone else? I wouldnt care. People have opinions of other people all the time and it usually has very little to do with how well the work, or their quality of work. Usually people's opinions have more to do with whether they like me generally and not whether I do good work.

Even though I know you know your own guidelines and work load, and you know the process and that its not your fault, I think you should still try and match your counterpart or at least get done early. It obvious that its impacting your job performance or at least they way your performance is evaluated. You dont want to have people think your name is "last minute Louis" even though it doesnt affect the finished product. Sometimes you have to play these games to survive.
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Old 08-17-17, 03:26 PM
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Re: How not to let procrastination affect people's opinion of you

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What type of feedback have you been receiving? What's the incentive of your NT coworker to finish is faster? Is he getting anything out of it?
I hadn't really received complaints before recently though I'm sure they have always been thinking I am a big procrastinator. They didn't complaint before because it's only been recently that the technicians have become so busy they often miss their 1st draft deadlines. There's always stress and unhappiness when deadlines are not met, even nonfinal deadlines so my delaying till essentially thr last minutes makes them feel like I just might accidentally delay too much and delay the technicians even further even though I havent. I just received a complaint though. Not to my boss, just to me.

My coworker getting the work done in advance makes everyone feel secure that at least one part of the task is already done. Also, there is benefit to him getting it to them earlier. If by some chance they have a break on their other projects, they can get started earlier on that work. That rarely happens these days but in general everyone is less stressed when things get done ahead of schedule even though it's only his part that is ahead.
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Old 08-17-17, 03:43 PM
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Re: How not to let procrastination affect people's opinion of you

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What do I think about people's opinions of me? I give it zero space in my head. Maybe a boss, I would care about, and if that boss had some notes for me on my performance I would obviously meet those expectations but as far as everyone else? I wouldnt care. People have opinions of other people all the time and it usually has very little to do with how well the work, or their quality of work. Usually people's opinions have more to do with whether they like me generally and not whether I do good work.

Even though I know you know your own guidelines and work load, and you know the process and that its not your fault, I think you should still try and match your counterpart or at least get done early. It obvious that its impacting your job performance or at least they way your performance is evaluated. You dont want to have people think your name is "last minute Louis" even though it doesnt affect the finished product. Sometimes you have to play these games to survive.
I know its impprtant to play the game. The problem is i cant without hurting my health and happiness. I try to get things done early but I can't stop myself from procrastinating. I actually already throw several coping skills in at a time and that is enough to keep the results good but not the opinion.

I imagine I'm already nicknamed last minute Louise. And their opinions actually do matter. My boss has very little influence on what responsibilities I get and what project I work on even though he's responsible for the actions of our group. It's the opinion of these people that decide that. Odd I guess but that is how it works.

I'm feeling like theirs nothing that can be done too like anonymouslyadd said too. The only think I'm tempted to do is ask the woman who complained to me to give me a deadline that is in advance of the deadline others have. This way, she never has to fear the chance of missing an ultimate deadline (that we actually have never missed except once) and in this way she can always be happy I've finished ahead of the real schedule.

I just need to retire. I have a strong feeling I'm going to miss a deadline sooner or later now if I don't soon. My budget would be really tight though if I did plus I'm concerned about what might happen with preexisting conditions coverage.
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Old 08-17-17, 03:43 PM
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Re: How not to let procrastination affect people's opinion of you

Thanks for responding guys. I feel better just talking about it.
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Old 08-17-17, 09:55 PM
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Re: How not to let procrastination affect people's opinion of you

I've been thinking about your situation and mine all day.

I think I'm going to use my experience to test what I'm learning in Chris Voss' book on negotiation. I have little to lose. I believe there are things I can learn that will help my interactions with others.

Let me know if you want the name of the book.
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Old 08-18-17, 10:30 AM
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Re: How not to let procrastination affect people's opinion of you

If you can:
Give them a time when youwill be done
But make that deadline earlier than actually necessary
Like "5:00 pm"
And then 1:00 pm you are done, checked work, submitted, and sail off to lunch
( this works for one part of my job though of course it depends on many factors!
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Old 08-18-17, 10:47 AM
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Re: How not to let procrastination affect people's opinion of you

Simple answer, don’t procrastinate.

If that means getting on, or adjusting, your meds, do so.


Cheers,
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Old 08-18-17, 06:12 PM
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Re: How not to let procrastination affect people's opinion of you

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Simple answer, dont procrastinate.

If that means getting on, or adjusting, your meds, do so.


Cheers,
Ian
Do your meds seriously work that well for you? I had tried a bunch of different meds and not one helped with procrastination. That said, I haven't tried dex, your preference. Maybe I'll give that one a try.


Thanks for all the responses. I'll answer more later when I have more time.
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Old 08-18-17, 06:30 PM
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Re: How not to let procrastination affect people's opinion of you

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Do your meds seriously work that well for you? I had tried a bunch of different meds and not one helped with procrastination. That said, I haven't tried dex, your preference. Maybe I'll give that one a try.


Thanks for all the responses. I'll answer more later when I have more time.
I don't think meds do everything, or stop procrastination, but I just have to do what I have to do when I have to do it. No one else is going to do it, I have to do what must be done.

But definitely try dex.
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Old 08-22-17, 01:41 PM
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Re: How not to let procrastination affect people's opinion of you

The perception that the people at work have of us (with ADHD) seems to be a common theme.

I know that I struggle mightily with it, way more than what is normal. I wish that I could not give any F's but I don't see that happening. It's a terrible feeling that I believe most of the time does impact performance even if it's subtle or unseen. Yet, even if it never does the feelings and self-talk are brutal.

I don't agree with those who said that you have to start to keep up with your co-worker because if you could you would. That's the essence of ADHD, isn't it?

Sadly, I don't think you will change your co-worker's perception either. They are opting not to look at the bigger picture in a rational or logical way. That's the most frustrating part in many ways isn't it??

You could switch groups and that may be a viable option that could play to your strengths. I don't think retiring is the answer if you'll take a big financial hit.

I think I'm a little more motivated since starting Strattera and Wellbutrin but not enough at all and am going to ask my pdoc for an increase in both on Friday. Full disclosure: I'm still dealing with depression as well so there's that on top of the ADHD-I.

I'm going to PM you for more related to this.
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Old 08-22-17, 02:01 PM
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Re: How not to let procrastination affect people's opinion of you

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Do your meds seriously work that well for you? I had tried a bunch of different meds and not one helped with procrastination. That said, I haven't tried dex, your preference. Maybe I'll give that one a try.
They do, yes. Im motivated to the point of it being a little unnatural on Dex...which is OK, given my job.

Dex...the med that is called for when all the weaker meds, and that means all others available, simply dont deliver the goods.


Cheers,
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Old 08-22-17, 02:14 PM
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Re: How not to let procrastination affect people's opinion of you

Two more things.


1.)
I guess I erased my signature in the preview box. Ooooops! Here it is:

ADHD-Inattentive, Adjustment Disorder w/Mixed Features of Anxiety and Depression, Dyscalculia (Math disability), Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria, Adult Child of an Alcoholic.
Strattera 80 mg, Wellbutrin SR 150 mg, Klonopin 0.5mg as needed.
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Shame corrodes the very part of us that believes we are capable of change.
Shame cannot survive being spoken. It can't survive empathy.

2.)
I am not sure if this is part of the issue for you too. In my mind the way my life is right now lends itself to giving way too much head space to these negative issues. I have literally have nothing else going on in my life other than work- I did have school but that's done and it wasn't really a positive outlet- in that I don't have friends or a social life or anything else going on so I've wondered if that makes a difference in how things are perceived.

What I mean is if someone has other positive things going on in life, does it still mean as much when people at work have negative opinions of us?

I am late to this issue as prior to 2009 and starting nursing school, having a really bad time with it causing depression, anxiety then the ADHD-I diagnoses then eventually failing out of that particular school which all caused me to have a nervous breakdown, I really never experienced the coworker perception issue. I think because I had jobs that played way more to my strengths than anything nursing-related and I had a normal life- had many friends, had a social life, went to church, etc.


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Old 08-22-17, 08:06 PM
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Re: How not to let procrastination affect people's opinion of you

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Sadly, I don't think you will change your co-worker's perception either. They are opting not to look at the bigger picture in a rational or logical way. That's the most frustrating part in many ways isn't it??
.
Thanks for your post. I really liked it.

And yes, that is the most frustrating part. The manager just sent out an email today saying that the whole project is being postponed. The schedule is being pushed back because the person who complained to me leads the task that made a big mistake which means she's even further behind than I am! And her groups mistake changes everyone elses work so it's screwed everyone over. Course all is forgiven with them cause they are such "hard workers" who tried their best. Very demotivational.

I actually missed a deadline on another project this week. It's getting that bad for me now. Fortunately, it was with a client who liked me enough that he had his HR department try to recruit me so it wasn't a big deal. Opinions of me actually vary dramatically. It's cause some people are very sensitive to my ADHD quirks and others focus on the big picture or don't work in the same office as me so don't see my weirdo ways as much.

I was talking to my mom who puts the paperwork together for my accountant to handle (she does my tax stuff for me while I cook dinner for her - it's an exchange that works for us even if it's weird). She thinks I do have enough to retire cause I don't actually spend all that much money to begin with. I'm just scared cause you never know how prices will escalate in the future - health insurance, food all go up in cost like crazy. I've decided just to take the risk. My family would back me up anyway if I miscalculated. I didn't want to risk having to rely on them but if it weren't for my assistance, they wouldn't be in their financial state today either so I've decided not to feel bad about using them as a security blanket.

I don't really suffer from the shame part as much cause I grew up with people who did believe in me. I'm sorry that you do and I hope things get better for you.
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