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Old 11-19-17, 01:52 PM
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Are men not allowed to think about sex anymore?

Society (or societies female population) deems it wrong for men to hold any sexual related thoughts at all. Or that's been my own experience at least. One of the first things I get asked by women is if I ever have sex on the mind. So me being the outstanding honest chap that I am, I give them a straight and honest answer, which results either in abuse or an instant shut out.

Women say they like honest men. Do they secretly prefer men that lie?
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Old 11-19-17, 01:55 PM
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Re: Are men not allowed to think about sex anymore?

I don't look upon it as a problem, as long as it doesn't turn into harrassment
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Old 11-19-17, 01:58 PM
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Re: Are men not allowed to think about sex anymore?

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I don't look upon it as a problem, as long as it doesn't turn into harrassment
Yes. But isn't there a general assumption made these days that any man who mentions the subject or gives an honest answer about it is "harassing" in some way?

That seems to be the reaction anyway. I'll keep being honest about it though, because I refuse to lie. Even if they don't like the answer.
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Old 11-19-17, 01:59 PM
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Re: Are men not allowed to think about sex anymore?

Goodness! I can not imagine asking a gentleman that.
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Old 11-19-17, 02:01 PM
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Re: Are men not allowed to think about sex anymore?

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Originally Posted by Little Missy View Post
Goodness! I can not imagine asking a gentleman that.
Well it's not usually worded that way. It's usually something across the lines of "are you just another sex obsessed freak?" or something similar.

Not really sure how I can answer a question like that in a subjective way though. How many sexual thoughts are considered "obsessed"? How many more to reach "freak" level? I'm really not sure.
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Old 11-19-17, 02:03 PM
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Re: Are men not allowed to think about sex anymore?

There needs to be some mystery. Sounds like some very forward women.
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Old 11-19-17, 02:05 PM
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Re: Are men not allowed to think about sex anymore?

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Originally Posted by Little Missy View Post
There needs to be some mystery. Sounds like some very forward women.
Very forward. So forward in fact that they've evolved beyond the point of natural human behaviours. Or so they seem to think. I'm sure they NEVER think about a filthy subject like sex.
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Old 11-19-17, 02:09 PM
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Re: Are men not allowed to think about sex anymore?

Nice can of worms, Fraser, a nice big can of worms indeed.

Yes, western culture, heck, all cultures, are in deep, deep denial of male sexuality.

As a result, we see that energy expressed in ways that distort it and prostitute it so as to make money.

Many women will be ambivalent about your personal truth in this regard.

Find those who accept you as you are, regardless of whether they have any interest in you.

And I will just say this...there are women who do understand male sexuality, or at least accept it without condition or judgment, and there are men who are the same in reciprocity with female sexuality.

Of course this all varies from person to person, and sexual orientation, gender, and interest will vary from person to person. Had to be politically correct, dontcha know.


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Old 11-19-17, 02:10 PM
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Re: Are men not allowed to think about sex anymore?

You get asked if you ever have sex on your mind? That seems like a silly question. I might worry if I was talking to a guy who never had it on his mind.

I assume you're talking about the online dating platform? You might be getting asked that question because the women on there have had some unfavorable experiences and are a little defensive. From my very short experience on there, the men think it's ok to start making distasteful and unnecessary sexual jokes after only a few exchanged messages. IMO, it's just not necessary. To me, it seems obvious that if you're on there looking for a relationship, sex will be involved, so why do they feel the need to even bring it up, especially when you've just started talking?
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Old 11-19-17, 02:12 PM
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Re: Are men not allowed to think about sex anymore?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Little Missy View Post
Goodness! I can not imagine asking a gentleman that.
And if you did, it wouldn't be a problem because a gentleman wouldn't discuss such things.


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Old 11-19-17, 02:13 PM
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Re: Are men not allowed to think about sex anymore?

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You get asked if you ever have sex on your mind? That seems like a silly question. I might worry if I was talking to a guy who never had it on his mind.

I assume you're talking about the online dating platform? You might be getting asked that question because the women on there have had some unfavorable experiences and are a little defensive. From my very short experience on there, the men think it's ok to start making distasteful and unnecessary sexual jokes after only a few exchanged messages. IMO, it's just not necessary. To me, it seems obvious that if you're on there looking for a relationship, sex will be involved, so why do they feel the need to even bring it up, especially when you've just started talking?
Yep I've had similar experiences, sexual comments on dating sites and even recieved a picture of erm ...... a certain part of the male anatomy after we'd been chatting for about 5 minutes
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Old 11-19-17, 02:15 PM
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Re: Are men not allowed to think about sex anymore?

In what universe is
Quote:
Originally Posted by Fraser_0762 View Post
if [you] ever have sex on the mind
the same as
Quote:
are you just another sex obsessed freak
?

Sure, men are often treated as sexual predators but that has nothing to do with what you are describing here.

There is a lot of grey between the EVER thinking about sex and ALWAYS thinking about sex (which is being obsessed). So presumably you, like most human beings male or female, would answer YES to the first question and NO to the second.

I too would be mildly worried if someone didn't know how to answer the second question
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Old 11-19-17, 02:16 PM
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Re: Are men not allowed to think about sex anymore?

Quote:
Originally Posted by WhiteOwl View Post
You get asked if you ever have sex on your mind? That seems like a silly question. I might worry if I was talking to a guy who never had it on his mind.

I assume you're talking about the online dating platform? You might be getting asked that question because the women on there have had some unfavorable experiences and are a little defensive. From my very short experience on there, the men think it's ok to start making distasteful and unnecessary sexual jokes after only a few exchanged messages. IMO, it's just not necessary. To me, it seems obvious that if you're on there looking for a relationship, sex will be involved, so why do they feel the need to even bring it up, especially when you've just started talking?
I think they probably see it as "weeding out" the "bad guys", or something. I don't really know. But all they're really doing is opening themselves up to people who will lie to them and lure them into a false sense of security.

To be honest, i'd rather have a conversation with someone without it getting all "sexed up". But here's the thing, women get bored, like really fast. Its really difficult trying to think up subject after subject that will keep her chatting with you. There's always a point in the conversation where there's just no response anymore, or an instant block.

It just feels like such a lose/lose regardless.
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Old 11-19-17, 02:19 PM
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Re: Are men not allowed to think about sex anymore?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Arthos View Post
In what universe is

the same as

?

Sure, men are often treated as sexual predators but that has nothing to do with what you are describing here.

There is a lot of grey between the EVER thinking about sex and ALWAYS thinking about sex (which is being obsessed). So presumably you, like most human beings male or female, would answer YES to the first question and NO to the second.

I too would be mildly worried if someone didn't know how to answer the second question
Of course I know how to answer it. But I can only answer it in my own way. I don't like giving simple yes/no answers to questions, because they too are conversation killers. Instead i'll give my answer, but i'll extend on the answer.

So in this case I would say something like "No, i'm not. However, I am a man with sexual thoughts and desires. Whats the big deal?"
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Old 11-19-17, 02:49 PM
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Re: Are men not allowed to think about sex anymore?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Fraser_0762 View Post
I think they probably see it as "weeding out" the "bad guys", or something. I don't really know. But all they're really doing is opening themselves up to people who will lie to them and lure them into a false sense of security.

To be honest, i'd rather have a conversation with someone without it getting all "sexed up". But here's the thing, women get bored, like really fast. Its really difficult trying to think up subject after subject that will keep her chatting with you. There's always a point in the conversation where there's just no response anymore, or an instant block.

It just feels like such a lose/lose regardless.
There really needs to be more honest guys on there, but it's really difficult to tell who is being honest. The few that I thought seemed honest and genuine at first, turned out not to be. You just can't trust anyone. That probably goes for women on there, as well. I think I'm like you, where I just can't lie, but sometimes I think I'm too honest and people can't handle that.

It does seem like online dating is just really difficult, in general. There are only so many things you can talk about before actually meeting the person. I'm not that good at small talk. I'm more like, "I don't care what your favorite movie is, are you my soul-mate, or nah?" j/k I think there are some people who can just talk forever and never have trouble coming up with subjects, but more often than not, you probably really quickly reach the point where you need to make a decision if you're going to meet in person and do things together in real life that will generate more things to talk about. When you think about it, when you first meet someone in real life, you don't sit there going, "What's your favorite movie?", "What are your 3 biggest flaws?", etc. It all seems so forced.
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