Do you get "Picked on" at work?

[whisper72]

I am 32 years old and I have a problem with people and how they treat me. I ave been called a retard by other co workers. Some of them are getting fustrated with me not being able to catch up and being so slow. I work in a big clothing store and my department is huge. I don't get very much respect at work and it really bothers me. Do any of you have the same problem?

[Pigeon]

Luckily I work alone now, but that's mostly because yes, in other jobs I have found that others find me "stupid" because I can't keep up with simple tasks. My friend with the same problem at work is able to blow it off and say "so what" but I can't do that, I take it very personally.

Even though I work alone, I have the same problem at school which I guess relates back to my posts in the social success thread. I eventually just avoid situations (finding a job working alone). I know this isn't a solution for everyone, especially with established jobs (I've never been able to have one).

So even though I'm not currently in this situation I too would like to hear what other's input is on this. Great thead!

--Pigeon

[speedo]

I don't get picked on at work, but I have had a rather horrid experience with someone exploiting my hypersensitivity. It was resolved happily, but I really would have preferred it never happened. Most employeres take a dim view of picking on people with add/adhd. You also have some protection under the law according to the americans with disabilities act. Sadly some employers find ways around the law, so tread carefully.

Me

[Emma S]

complain to your boss,any form of bullying and abuse is not supposed to be tolerated in the work place.

[meadd823]

A question to ask your self.

Is your job suited for you. I mean I really sucked at costomer service because I had to sit down all day every thing was timed including my bath room trips. However I can do several things well any thing that allows me to walk and talk.

If you are slightly slower or newer but feel your job is a good fit (jerks and there words excluded) then is the person hasslwing you just one person or a small group of people that hang with this same person ?????

If it's an entire department it could be they are being negatively effected by some thing you are or aren't doing. Even if they are inconvienced by some thing you do poking fun is a juvinile way of handling it.

Some people have to make their selves feel better by making other look and feel bad. They are not happy people which has nothing to do with you.

Should it be the latter then how do you react. How you react may be keeping the harrassment going. Over reacting may in fact be feeding thier warpped feeling of power and control!!!!!

[MovingOn]

Originally Posted by Emma S

complain to your boss,any form of bullying and abuse is not supposed to be tolerated in the work place.

I used to believe this also, to be honest the basic unwritten rules of professional behavior took care of bullying for years.

HOWEVER..... the OH SO REDNECK STATE OF TENNESSEE allows any kind of verbal bullying and more, so long as the offender does not come right out and say " I am doing this because of your sex, religion, race, etc." The laws here encourage discrimination and abuse in the work place "becuz them good ol' boys ain't gonna put up with no yankee union!!!" Job related abuse is condoned and supported because of our "right to work" laws that keep the labor unions from gaining a foothold.

So be careful if you complain to your boss, because his answer just might be "if you don't like it you need to leave"....That's what mine said even though my performance in my job proved to be extremely good...Sales and profit figures don't lie!

[meadd823]

The laws here encourage discrimination and abuse in the work place "becuz them good ol' boys ain't gonna put up with no yankee union!!!" Job related abuse is condoned and supported because of our "right to work" laws that keep the labor unions from gaining a foothold.

We have "right to work" in Texas; I have NEVER worked any where that had a union. Don't exactly want on either. The anti discrimination law are federal and have absolutely nothing to do with weather or not your state allows unions or not!!!!

It sounds like you worked for a crappy company. Companies and bosses come in crappy, if they want to be that way unless I feel the need to "right a wrong" I go on to a better place of employment. Why would the laws be protective of you until now????Missing a piece in me brain or some thing!!!!

The laws here encourage discrimination and abuse in the work place "becuz them good ol' boys ain't gonna put up with no yankee union!!!"

Actually I find this almost offensive. Just because some one is anti-untion does NOT make them pre-discrimination. I personally feel like Uncle Sam swindles me out of enough money each pay check and I don't want another bunch of bureaucrats relieving my check of any more money.

[MovingOn]

Tammy-

My brain agrees with you on so many levels. I have also been told that the right to work laws in other states do not protect bullying abuse. This is not the case in Tennessee.

Due to all of the Crap that I have had to deal with at numerous jobs (I work in situations that are VERY male dominated), my sis-in-law Knew exactly how to protect herself at her job when she was hired by a man that turned out to be EXCESSIVELY verbally abusive. Dated note books, co-worker witnesses, tape recordings, everything! When the day came that she finally couldn't take it anymore (her payscale was generous so quitting was not an option) she went to her HR department where she was told that her boss had been warned about this exact behavior prior to being transferred from Washington state and HR excitedly encouraged her to pursue the issue with full documentation.

She prepared everything and went back to HR where she was greeted with a very cold shoulder.Previously the hero that was going to rid the company of the office ogre, she was now the office pariah!

She and my brother consulted six labor attorneys and all 6 told them that she had NO CASE, because verbal abuse (excessive screaming, yelling, and foul language) on an ongoing almost daily basis is not considered a hostile work environment in Tennessee due to the way that our IGNORANT right-to-work laws are written. My brother IS a Teamster and HE found this incredulous! She was forced to quit.

I am a native Tennessean and I love this area, but I do despise the redneck mentality. (The words "redneck" and "southern" are not to be confused, for I have met rednecks from Minnesota and New Jersey.) Yes rednecks can have money and own businesses and in East Tennessee it is very common. When companies move here from out of state they always have press releases touting high pay scales and great working conditions, but it doesn't take long for them to realize that the workers in this area are so pathetically ignorant that they too can get by with low payscales and abusive behavior.

I am looking forward to the day that these laws will be challenged in Federal court. Its just difficult for anyone to even get started when the lawyers have been golfing with the offending business owners for years! Thus the ignorant redneck good ol' boys network still reigns supreme!!!

I almost forgot, my worst offending boss ever was transferred to San Antonio last year. Now you guys can deal with the chauvinistic, incompetent, ignorant redneck bag of filth!!! PLEASE take him down!

Sorry to rant and rave, but this exact problem has cost me both my sanity and almost a million dollars in lost personal income over the last 9 years. That dollar figure is truly NOT an exageration.

And I can't seem to dig my way out of this hole...

[MafiaKiddo]

Sorry but no way I'd let anyone pick on me at work or anywhere else. I have a short fuse and little to no impulse control LOL. If someone said something I didn't appreciate they'd get punched in the mouth before they could finish the sentence.

Of course if your co-workers have to pick up the slack because you can't handle the job it's a lot more understandable. Not excusable but I know the feeling very well. You run yourself into the ground doing your work and someone elses eventually that aggrivation is gonna come out.

[HighFunctioning]

The question:

Originally Posted by whisper72

Do any of you have the same problem?

Never directly. Some people act quite unusual torwards myself that isn't seen torwards others. I think it is mostly due to my asocialness, attitude torwards learning (self-exploration), and unique ways of completing tasks (that seem overly complicated because of their tolerance of repetitive work).

Whether one is picked on relates to the field. I don't really get picked on because my area is filled with disorganized, somewhat geeky people as it is. I sort of "fit in", but not really.

[Crazygirl79]

Hi
I've experienced this in several workplaces, but I've never had a co-worker come straight out and call me a retard and the like because in Australia I could take them to court if they did and as for those who are calling you a retard they are absolutley pathetic, they obviously have no lives if they have to go around harrasing other people for little or no reason at all, you need to say to them next time "Ignorance is a BIGGER disability than anything I have" and also I suggest you speak to your manager/supervisor and if that doesn't work then inform your manager/supervisor that you will speak to your local disability discrimination act and perhaps a lawyer or worse the media ( watch the sh*t hit the fan and watch how fast they'll go to try and top the harrasment...geez won't those lovely people who are calling you a retard be in deep deep sh*t) The type of harrasment I recieved when I was working at Maccas at 17 was being pulled up for mistakes but when someone else makes the same mistake they didn't get pulled up and being pulled up for every single thing....nit-picking I suppose, I also felt I was being driven out of my job as the managers in the last 6 months of my year at Maccas were making my life and job harder than it needed to be...well this is how I saw it, it got to the point where I felt it was best to leave altogether and I've never looked back, I'm so glad I left that job, another was at a youth service (I was the office cleaner for 3 years) while most of the "staff" with "better" jobs treated me nicely there were a couple of them who I felt were being superficial and treating me as if I was beneath them and again it got to the stage where I started to hate my job again and I was happy to leave....mind you I've never looked back either...lol...at the moment I'm unemployed! but I do suggest you nip this harrasment in the bud sooner rather than later!

Originally Posted by whisper72

I am 32 years old and I have a problem with people and how they treat me. I ave been called a retard by other co workers. Some of them are getting fustrated with me not being able to catch up and being so slow. I work in a big clothing store and my department is huge. I don't get very much respect at work and it really bothers me. Do any of you have the same problem?

[Prairiewind]

I don't get picked on but I've really been feeling the disrespect lately. For some reason I am held to higher standards than others. My work looks the best of all, but others get away with things I never would. I get told not to get caught putting polish on my nails (which takes about 30 seconds), while my boss and the other girl huddle together to do their scratch-out lottery tickets right in front of me, and could get caught a lot more easily than me (and I don't do lottery tickets). My boss hung his priorities list on my desk when he could just as easily have hung it on his own, and sure as heck didn't ask me if he could. I just wish I could stand up for myself. Do I have to be a b**** to get any respect?

[Prairiewind]

You see this avatar? This is what I feel like most of the time - cute and soft and vigilant but I'd sure like to shoot some people in the a** when they make me angry.

[MovingOn]

Prariewind-

I know this problem intimately! You sound so much like me. These people hold us to a higher standard out of jealously of our performance and therefore take any possible opportunity to point out ANY perceived flaw. (It also sounds like you are doing your boss' job instead of just supporting him.)

Please notice that I said perceived flaw. The next time you feel like polishing your nails at your desk ( I've done this myself, usually because I'm meeting with a customer soon) reply with " Multi-tasking is how I always do my job. I am perfectly capable of throwing on a coat of nail polish at the same time that I am mentally planning __________" Fill in the blank with something of his that you have somehow become responsible for, or just something that you consistently do well at. What can they say then?

Also, it sounds like you really need to start playing office politics if you want to get ahead. Unfortunately I have learned the hard way that this is mandatory. At a previous position that I was forced to leave because of ongoing viscious verbal abuse (my sales performance blew my predesessors' record out of the water [he of course being my boss at the time]), I took my case all the way to the company VP that was responsible for my division. He seemed like a reasonable person at first but turned out to be an discriminatory *****. I left.

A year and a half later, at an industry event, I had an opportunity to introduce myself to the president of my prior company. He apologized profusely for having never met me before and when I briefly explained my current position and abilities, he started telling me all about his company's major current undertaking. He told me that my skills could have changed the direction of his last move! (The path he didn't take due to a lack of skilled help, was exactly the work that I excell at) More importantly our brains were operating on the same identical plane! How different might things have been had I just played politics.

[Imnapl]

I used to keep score. My quality of life improved immensely when I decided to just focus on my own personal standards.