17 yo son with ADD

[sherigraph]

undefinedMy son is 17 yo, a junior in high school. He was diagnosed in 8th grade with ADD. We then had him put on Strattera, just hated it. Took him off. Again in 9th grade, same thing. Ugggg. Last year in 10th, we tried the natural approach, was ok, but not that great. Now this year, haven't done anything but try to help him through. It is so tough, and alot of arguements, he hangs out with his friends alot, not always a good influence, but so far he hasn't caused any horrible problems. Don't always know if he is being completely honest with us. He struggles in a couple classes, and also has issues with getting everything turned in. When I ask him if it is done, turned in, he tells me yes, then I e-mail the teacher/teachers if needed and find out the opposite. Does he truely think he turned them in? Well, we are almost just about to say, you are on your own. You will either fail, or get your butt in gear. I did talk to dh today and told him we need to do something. Try another med, etc... What I would like to know is, what is the best kind of doctor to go to for ADD? The doctor I have does not want to put him on Adderal/concerta. She says they can become addictive, where as she swears by Strattera. I also told my son he may need to talk to someone if put on meds, and he is addamant on No WAY will he do that. He won't have the choice, but just thought I would let you know what his opinion is. Any ideas, suggestions?

[MGDAD]

Sounds really rough. Especially with a 17 yo.

How was he diagnosed? Does he think he has ADHD too? Is he frustrated with his behavior etc?

I have had a recent, good experience with therapy for my younger daughter so I am high on that. He definately needs someone to talk to. Try and get a good referal to a psychologist or a family therapy professional.

A big first question is to decide if he will relate better with men or women before you pick a therapist. He may say he does not want to talk to someone, but a good therapist will get past that.

[speedo]

1) He knows when the homework is done.

2) if a workable combination of meds can be arrived at, do so.

ADD is a disorder. it is not trivial and should not be overlooked.

Originally Posted by sherigraph

undefinedMy son is 17 yo, a junior in high school. He was diagnosed in 8th grade with ADD. We then had him put on Strattera, just hated it. Took him off. Again in 9th grade, same thing. Ugggg. Last year in 10th, we tried the natural approach, was ok, but not that great. Now this year, haven't done anything but try to help him through. It is so tough, and alot of arguements, he hangs out with his friends alot, not always a good influence, but so far he hasn't caused any horrible problems. Don't always know if he is being completely honest with us. He struggles in a couple classes, and also has issues with getting everything turned in. When I ask him if it is done, turned in, he tells me yes, then I e-mail the teacher/teachers if needed and find out the opposite. Does he truely think he turned them in? Well, we are almost just about to say, you are on your own. You will either fail, or get your butt in gear. I did talk to dh today and told him we need to do something. Try another med, etc... What I would like to know is, what is the best kind of doctor to go to for ADD? The doctor I have does not want to put him on Adderal/concerta. She says they can become addictive, where as she swears by Strattera. I also told my son he may need to talk to someone if put on meds, and he is addamant on No WAY will he do that. He won't have the choice, but just thought I would let you know what his opinion is. Any ideas, suggestions?

[Kimalimah]

I would encourage you to talk to another doctor and try to find one that your son feels really comfortable with. My son decided to go off his meds a couple of years ago and no matter how awful his life became he insisted that he could "handle" it. Thank goodness we found a child psychiatrist who he really like because she treated him with respect who was able to convince him that he needed the medications, that he was trying to handle something with will-power that just couldn't be handled that way.

There are all kinds of different medications out there and your doctor doesn't seem to be particularly well informed. I formed this opinion from their comment that Adderall and Concerta are addicting! Keep trying. Even though your son is almost an adult he still needs you fighting for him.

Kim

[barbyma]

Originally Posted by Kimalimah

There are all kinds of different medications out there and your doctor doesn't seem to be particularly well informed. I formed this opinion from their comment that Adderall and Concerta are addicting! Keep trying. Even though your son is almost an adult he still needs you fighting for him.

I agree wholeheartedly.

First, Strattera isn't working for him. It doesn't work for a LOT of people.
Second, the research shows that children w/ADHD are VERY unlikely to develop addictions to stimulants if they are taken as directed (not snorted or injected; theraputic doses). BUT, if left untreated, they ARE likely to self-medicate. This is not an age where you want to start dealing with addictions to street drugs.

Over the age of 13, most psychiatrists will treat him. Under that age, you'd need a child psychiatrist. A psychiatrist will be much more informed about the effectiveness and risks of various treatments.

GOOD LUCK!!!

[barbyma]

Originally Posted by sherigraph

I also told my son he may need to talk to someone if put on meds, and he is addamant on No WAY will he do that. He won't have the choice, but just thought I would let you know what his opinion is. Any ideas, suggestions?

He doesn't want therapy? Not surprising for a 17yo boy, I guess. But, he may not need it.

Suggestion: let him know that most psychiatrists, if they do require some therapy in conjunction with meds, will only do so for as long as they think he needs it. If he truly doesn't need it, the doc will be able to tell. If he shuts down or closes up, he's going to be on the couch awhile! And if it turns out he does need therapy, he'll be glad in the end.

[sherigraph]

[b]We had him diagnosed finally in 8th grade. He got to where he was failing courses, and high school would be following. We did the connors thing, the teachers did, the school pschologist did his part. He got to a point where he just wanted to try without and that is what we have been doing. It isn't working. Are psychiatrist ones that can talk to them and also perscribe the meds or would we have to use a different doctor for the meds? I think he would relate better to a man, but not sure. We also took him to a pschologist here after 9th grade because I wanted him tested for dyslexia also. Which thank goodness he isn't. He isn't ADHD, just ADD. He is disorganized, of course alot of us are, lol. I will ask him to do something, doesn't get done. I will tell him to be home by a certain time, he will say he thought I said something else. I now have to say, repeat what I just said, but that doesn't always matter. He is a great kid, as of now, he isn't doing illegal things, like drinking or drugs. It is his self-esteem I get really concerned about and wanting to quit school. (which so far he hasn't said that) but I know how much he dislikes school.

[barbyma]

Originally Posted by sherigraph

[b]Are psychiatrist ones that can talk to them and also perscribe the meds or would we have to use a different doctor for the meds?

Psychiatrists are MDs, so they prescribe.

[sherigraph]

[b]Well, I talked to our psychologist just a minute ago to see who she could refer us to. I set up an appt. with one of the pediatricians here in town. She said he is very conservative, very good and if we need him to see someone, we would just take him to her again since she has already worked with him. I know he will not be happy, but I don't feel I have any other choice. WE have tried to do it by letting him do it alone or with just our help, but it isn't working. We do have good insurance, so not to concerned about that. I will also talk to the vice principal at his high school to see what our options are to help him, which I know he won't want either. It is all for his own good though.

[Kimalimah]

Good luck with your appointment. I hope your son will keep an open mind. Maybe by encouraging him to take an active role in the decisions to be made will help. I know it was really important to my son to be treated as an individual with a say in his life. Instead of telling him that he had to take his meds I told him I would work with him to find the best solution, but that would include further evaluation by a doctor.

I also told him that if he really wanted to be off the meds I would work to get him there, but that it wasn't something he could just stop without replacing with some other "treatment" (therapy, behavioral mod therapy, autogenous training, yoga, etc). He agreed to wean down which gave a bit of relief while we sorted it out and in the end he stayed on a normal dose by his choice.

I hope that he will work with you...

Keep us posted.

Kim

[MGDAD]

Originally Posted by barbyma

He doesn't want therapy? Not surprising for a 17yo boy, I guess. But, he may not need it.

Suggestion: let him know that most psychiatrists, if they do require some therapy in conjunction with meds, will only do so for as long as they think he needs it. If he truly doesn't need it, the doc will be able to tell. If he shuts down or closes up, he's going to be on the couch awhile! And if it turns out he does need therapy, he'll be glad in the end.

This is excellent advice. I think that most people who do not want therapy do not really know what it is like.

[sherigraph]

Exactly what I was thinking. I have tried telling him this, he doesn't want to even think about it.

[sherigraph]

Took my son to the doctor today, he asked some questions, and put him on Adderal XR, 20 mg. Told me we should notice a difference soon. To watch for the side effects and if we need to give a higher dose. I will keep you posted. My son I think is ready to give it a shot.

[barbyma]

Great news!

[sherigraph]

He has been taking the Adderall for a week and a half now. I think it is helping, but can't tell with school yet. The semester is almost over and he starts the new one next week. Fresh start so hopefully it will help. I have notice he has been bringing up his trash, dishes, cleaning up his room and putting his clothes away without being asked now. So that is an improvement. He did also go see his counsilor at school to get his schedule changed for next semester since he failed two classes this one.