Scared to confront my parents/therapist/doctors/university tutor about ADD

[Kahless]

I am totally convinced now that I have ADD, and nothing has been clearer to me for years. I am already diagnosed Asperger's but I've always felt there was something missing. Because everyone assumes I am just Asperger's, nobody in my immediate circle seems to believe that they can coexist, yet I have done scores of hours of research into this, and talked with the manager of a local support group. They are all convinced I have it, please help how can I convince my family/therapists/doctor etc. about it. I have read a couple of books, and researched lots about medications (ritalin and adderrall) and I religiously believe treating my ADD will finallly fix a lot of my issues. Indeed an ADHDer I know gave me a concerta pill for run a while back and now on reflection I can see how I suddenly felt really really focused and able to overcome the massive mout everest barrier of motivation I have always had when it comes to meanial tasks or uni work etc. I am a perpetual procrastinator yet doing an actitvity I am obsessed with is no questions asked. The AS/ADD combo can be quite complex and unique but had on my heart I am 110 % sure ADD is the missing half.

I've always had big problems with being on time for things, keeping deadlines, and motivation.

I'd like to try ritalin or adderall, and wan't to get a prescription and ADD diagnosis.

Would I be able to get them from my doctor without a diagnosis, if I got my psychotherapist, social worker, and somone else who runs an training consultancy to write letters.

I am having problems with my local council as they haven't placed me under any psychiatrist, which would greatly help as when I go to the doctor to get a referral and prescription, they would then refer me on to a psychiatrist anyway, but the council are being awkard about it. I recently had an incident where I was kept hostage by a drug gang for 2 days and had £1700 worth of stuff taken, so it's now made me realise what the root cause is. I'm trying to do too many things at once, and I get very easily distracted by something as simple as a phone call or people asking me out for the evening, then settling back to work becomes very hard.

Or would I need a diagnosis first? If I got a private diagnosis would that suffice? Or go down the NHS route? But I know that would take ages.

Does all thisi story sound familiar?

[ginnal]

I found that telling people about ADD was entirely pointless unless there was some tangible benefit to doing so, for one most people will simply assume you are full of **** because they are comfortable in their ignorance and more importantly it will give them some reference to use against you.
I have found in my personal dealings I would much rather be percieved as an ******* than a whiner and as such I only tell people whom a) are somewhat capable of seeing add for what it, and b) whom have some something to offer men contingent upon my being add.

[speedo]

It's not unusual to have comorbid AS and ADHD. The trouble lies in the fact that the doctors won't give two primary diagnoses at the same time.

You should talk to your doc about your attention issues as it may be possible to treat them.

In some cases it is not possible to do so, and you will need to work with your doctor to determine what the options are.

It's sad to hear that someone has taken advantage of an aspie, but there are a few bad people in this world, so you need to be careful of whom you trust. I'm hoping that your troubles have been resolved and you are no longer held hostage by bad people.

Me

Originally Posted by Kahless

I am totally convinced now that I have ADD, and nothing has been clearer to me for years. I am already diagnosed Asperger's but I've always felt there was something missing. Because everyone assumes I am just Asperger's, nobody in my immediate circle seems to believe that they can coexist, yet I have done scores of hours of research into this, and talked with the manager of a local support group. They are all convinced I have it, please help how can I convince my family/therapists/doctor etc. about it. I have read a couple of books, and researched lots about medications (ritalin and adderrall) and I religiously believe treating my ADD will finallly fix a lot of my issues. Indeed an ADHDer I know gave me a concerta pill for run a while back and now on reflection I can see how I suddenly felt really really focused and able to overcome the massive mout everest barrier of motivation I have always had when it comes to meanial tasks or uni work etc. I am a perpetual procrastinator yet doing an actitvity I am obsessed with is no questions asked. The AS/ADD combo can be quite complex and unique but had on my heart I am 110 % sure ADD is the missing half.

I've always had big problems with being on time for things, keeping deadlines, and motivation.

I'd like to try ritalin or adderall, and wan't to get a prescription and ADD diagnosis.

Would I be able to get them from my doctor without a diagnosis, if I got my psychotherapist, social worker, and somone else who runs an training consultancy to write letters.

I am having problems with my local council as they haven't placed me under any psychiatrist, which would greatly help as when I go to the doctor to get a referral and prescription, they would then refer me on to a psychiatrist anyway, but the council are being awkard about it. I recently had an incident where I was kept hostage by a drug gang for 2 days and had £1700 worth of stuff taken, so it's now made me realise what the root cause is. I'm trying to do too many things at once, and I get very easily distracted by something as simple as a phone call or people asking me out for the evening, then settling back to work becomes very hard.

Or would I need a diagnosis first? If I got a private diagnosis would that suffice? Or go down the NHS route? But I know that would take ages.

Does all thisi story sound familiar?

[QueensU_girl]

I'd photocopy some checklists of ADHD symptoms and take them with you, KAHLESS.

I don't think it has to be confrontational in a bad way.

If you have to do Public Medicare (Canada here is similar to your NHS in the UK) -- you may want to see a Public MD/Psychiatrist, BUT get your "testing" (neuropsychologist testing) done privately, as good testing by Psychologists may not be funded/available in the UK.

(Psychologist's Testing of adults is not routinely covered here in Canada. Unless one is Forensic (locked ward), or moderately/severely mentally delayed or something.)

A written Test Report will 'prove' your ADHD symptoms. (e.g. working memory problems, Trails A&B tests, Tower of Hanoi test, WCST, CPT, PASAT listening test, etc)

[QueensU_girl]

re: vulnerabilities

Yes. You could have your Doctor write a letter of recommendation to your "council" asking that your position in the list be prioritized. There is scads of research to show that vulnerable and disabled people are at extreme risk of being victimized. And RE-victimized.

Asperger's would definitely fall into this category.

My SO has had a few Asperger's female's who were unable to protect themselves from predatory people (mostly men), due to their 'affective literacy impairments' and non-verbal 'behaviour' reading inabilities.

Hard to judge a potential offender's, stranger's , or friend's "motives". (And friend's can become offenders, too.)


If your disability impairs your ability to non-verbally assess & judge your basic safety and danger in situations, (and possibly impairs the ability to "protect yourself"), you should be prioritized by the System.

This could extend to "inability to safely cross the street", "inability to judge/avoid attack dogs", "inability to avoid groups of thugs that could hurt you", etc, too.

That safety issue ('risk of harm to self or others is, in essence, the crux of most mental health policies -- to protect the vulnerable from being targeted and victimized by predatory & manipulative criminals, like the "drug gang" you mention.


If you were doing other things that put you at risk -- like walking on the freeway lanes, or going out for long walks in 40 degrees below with no coat, or pulling off all your clothing (as some 'ill people' might do), you would be assessed ASAP.

Your case is a bit more subtle/invisible, but risky still the same, IMNSHO.

FWIW, my SO did this Forensic Assessment for 8 years, and I learned quite a bit about it.

Vulnerable people are entitled to assessment as much as the others, if not more.


-Emma

PS cut & paste & print this, if you need, to.

[meadd823]

QueensU is going along the same lines I was thinking also. I mean can you locate and prived them with a copy of research {the long version full of medical jargon is best doctors like that sort of stuff}

I think Canada's system is closer to the UK one than we are in the US. Also other members from your area here on ADDF, who have been diagosed may also be helpful in this area.It is just your system is so much differnt than the American one I am of little use when it comes to the national health care organizations of other counteries.

[Kahless]

Thank you for the help.

I have already done a fair bit of research into this so that I would be sure I do have this condition.

I've gotten some VERY VERY good advice from a charity called DANDA www.danda.org.uk .

I've got a load of information sheets about ADD symptoms, and borrowed a couple of very good books including one called 'ADD - The Unfocused Mind in Children and Adults' which is about the best I've seen as it talks a lot about the brain chemistry side of things.

I now think I would really benefit from stimulant pills like Adderall or Ritalin. Would prefer to try adderall as it seems to have less side effects.

One big problem is a lot of people still have the myth in their mind that people grow out of ADD, but looking back over the years I can see how it's been an unrecognised problem within me just as much as AS.

Explains why I've not done as well academically as I should be. Despite IQ being > 140 the ADD makes applying it hard. Why I'm PERPETUALLY leaving coursework to the last minute (got 2 major projects to get done within 3 weeks). I take on too many tasks on the side too - got a 2000 piece to write for a book, and a speech to write for a conference this Friday I'm talking at. Not even started either yet! Am at uni part time doing an IT degree. In my second to last year but still getting work done on time is such a huge struggle.

If I got the ADD diagnosis it would help my tutors recognise why I find deadlines so hard, then at the last minute I get the urge to do it, overwork myself with lots of late nights etc. and get into really bad sleeping patterns, feel tired, wake up late for lectures etc.

I know I have the ability to sail through these things, but people think I'm lazy and awkward, if only they could recognise the ADD they will see why.

The episode that got me stuck at this drug den (crack, heroine and all they had there) was after I went to a club with a few friends, then got lead on by some random stranger in the street. I was rather drunk at the time but I know I easily fall into those traps in states like that I've had to learn to trust people less the hard way, I can read people fine, it's knowing their ulterior motives that becomes hard, but everyone has this to one extent. I am at the very high end of the AS spectrum but because of the ADD they are hard to seperate. Really because they are part of the same continuum IMO.

I've been receiving CBT for the last 4 months a lot of which is based around addressing issues of motivation, focus, and 'decluttering' my life and mind. It's had some success but I KNOW this will be limited until the ADD is recognised.

One of my huge difficulties that has gone on for years is literally writing down lists of hundreds of things to do then achieving about 10 % of them. I have too many ideas for myself to cope with, then some disaster happens like me PDA being nicked and I lost them all. So the next 2 weeks I'm recycling thoughts remembering what I'm doing. I could go on and on but I'm assuming this is all a familiar story.

I'm going to go about arranging the diagnosis myself, and pay for that (despite not having a great deal of money atm). Next Tuesday I'm going to give myself the drive to confront my therapist and put all the material in front of her about it. I've subtley mentioned it a few times but she doesn't think I have it. I've got a book called 'ADHD: A psychological approach in practice' which is about CBT for ADD adults. Many of the diagrams and strategies in there seem to be exactly what I need and are more relevant than some of the stuff we've tried so far.

If I go down the NHS diagnosis route it could take months, as I expect they will deny I have it at first. As long as a diagnosis helps me access the right services I don't mind if it's private or NHS.

What sort of help do they give you at your uni in Canada, and how helpful are the doctors and general ADDitude towards this condition?

Interesting that I joine this forum over 2 years ago, taken me that long to finally conclude I do have it.

Now given recent events I want to get everything 'fixed' in a matter of WEEKS not months.

[Kahless]

Does anyone know of any PURELY ADD or ADHD support groups in London?

[FuturePast]

You'll find UK-specific information on adders.org.

[Imnapl]

Kahless, do your teachers know of your Asperger Syndrome? In Canada you are more likely to qualify for accommodations with Asperger Syndrome than with ADHD.

[~boots~]

Kahless..My step-son has aspergers, and was prescribed add meds for the same trouble you have. They helped a lot, and he didn't need the official add diagnosis, because his specialist could prescribe them with his aspergers diagnosis..

good luck, I hope you get help soon ;-)

[Imnapl]

Originally Posted by tracyhaddb

Kahless..My step-son has aspergers, and was prescribed add meds for the same trouble you have. They helped a lot, and he didn't need the official add diagnosis, because his specialist could prescribe them with his aspergers diagnosis..

good luck, I hope you get help soon ;-)

Good point, Tracy. The use of medications often used to help ADHD is not limited to patients with ADHD.

[Kahless]

Originally Posted by Imnapl

Good point, Tracy. The use of medications often used to help ADHD is not limited to patients with ADHD.

Thank you that's a very good point.

If I can explain my ADD symptoms enough and get a report from my therapist and university disability coordinator that migt be enough.

Atfter all ADD is part of neurodiversity like Asperger's.

My tutors know about Asperger's as I get something called a Disabled Student's Allowance which is a government grant to get me extra mentoring time and any special equipment, e.g. dictaphone.

Do they have that in Canada?

[Ground Control]

Hi Kahless,

I've been reading this post with some interest because I had heard of Aspergers and always thought that it was almost like an extreme version of ADHD in some respects.

Keep fighting the good fight. I think you're on the right track with the combined meds that can treat both AS and ADHD. It doesn't really matter what other people thing you have as long as you function better and feel better.

As for uni here, I made it through without a diagnosis of my ADHD. But I did get help due to a physical handicap affecting my writing. I was given more time in exams adn I was allowed to use a computer so I could type as it is faster for me.

I hope this helps.

[Imnapl]

Originally Posted by Kahless

Thank you that's a very good point.

If I can explain my ADD symptoms enough and get a report from my therapist and university disability coordinator that migt be enough.

Atfter all ADD is part of neurodiversity like Asperger's.

My tutors know about Asperger's as I get something called a Disabled Student's Allowance which is a government grant to get me extra mentoring time and any special equipment, e.g. dictaphone.

Do they have that in Canada?

I don't know. Kahless, as Speedo mentioned somewhere on these forums, you don't need to seek another diagnosis to ask for help for any attention problems you are having. Just tell your doctor you would like to try a med to help you focus.