motivation to lose weight

[Worried23]

I have my 9 year old brother who is gaining weight at a very fast rate. Mum and dad are both fat except me and my younger brother. But since the past three months he has gained some 5 lbs of excess weight. He has become very lazy and has stopped playing football and other games that he was very fond of. He doesn’t eat much though. I can show you his photograph and you will be surprised to see how he has changed in three months. I have already uploaded the image on http://www.2and2.net but I don’t know why it doesn’t appear over here. Can’t we post photos? I am really worried about him. How can I motivate him to lose weight?

[Eden]

perhaps he is growing...my daughter who is ten goes through growth spurts...I am thin compared to the rest of my family and I to worry about her eating habits because there is obesity in our genes...the only thing I can do is encourage her to eat healthy. just remember when children go through puberty they need more fat in thier diet...they tend to put on weight between the ages of 9-12.

[Imnapl]

Five pounds in three months doesn't seem like much weight gain in a growing child. What does his doctor say? Perhaps a check up is in order?

A word of caution: even boys can develop eating disorders and "motivating him to lose weight" might just be the start of one. If you feel eating habits in your home are unhealthy, talk to your parents about it. "Thin" doesn't necessarily mean healthy. Kids your brother's age are usually motivated to eat healthy and exercise, not to lose weight.

[piglet]

It sure sounds like you're fretting way too much. I would suggest, shut up and just go have some fun with him. Take him to the roller rink or something, or mini golf, or swimming, anythingto get out and DO, and spend time together, and talk and bond. Making that part of your lives is the best thing you can do for him.

[maryam]

This is my opinion, but it comes from somebody who has an extensive personal and family history or eating disorders and bad self-image. Please hear me out.

He's young. Many children go through chubby phases where they gain weight, but then they commonly go through phases where they grow taller and even out. I would not worry about this at all. I would encourage more outdoor activities with the whole family and healthier meals (again, for the whole family) but I would not, under any circumstances, single him out. He's a growing boy, let his body grow!

My brother went through many of these phases, and we let his body do its thing. He's now a handsome, tall, muscular 15-year-old, and he still has a lot of growing to do. My sister was a chubby child as well, and now she's a model. Nobody bothered her. There was an assumption that she'd even out, and she did.

I, on the other hand, was pressured by my grandmother to become obsessed about food at the age of 9. I developed an eating disorder. I'm the shortest person in my family, and at the age of 22, I'm reversing a lot of damage. I wished that people would have left well enough alone and let me grow as a child should, but I was never given that chance.

Please talk to your parents about this. It's normal for children to go through phases. This can be a way for your family to become more active and healthy rather than to single him out. It'll be fun, I swear

[QueensU_girl]

A dramatic weight gain in three months, eh?

Have you taken him to the Doctor? Endocrine disorders, etc, can do this sort of thing.

---------

Why is he "lazy"?

EG lazy and overweight

• So the whole family goes out together & does sports like soccer and biking & he stays home on the couch all alone? Inactive kids usually have inactive parents...
• Noone else in your famly is overweight or inactive?
• Who are his family fitness role models?
• People can overeat or avoid activity/"self-care" for deeper emotional reasons.
• You may not know what those emotional reasons are...(and he might not be telling you, or have the words for his problems/experiences/feelings). Kids can't always verbalize what they are going thru or what has happened to them to make them feel they way they feel.
• Some people are looking "lazy" because they are depressed. (Many will deny it. Males with depression in our society is seen as shameful. Men are not supposed to be weak. Some even commit suicide rather than admit to depression, eh?)
• Depression in males can present as 'irritability"/'SOB' rather than "sadness/tearfulness".
• If everyone is putting him down and calling him LAZY (yourself included), then he is probably not so high in the Self-Esteem area, huh?
• This is an ADHD/LD website. Doe LDs/ADHD run in your family? It is known that we people undergo Bullying at an astonishing rate.
• Bullying could be causing your brother to avoid activity, other kids, etc. (Fat kids and LD kids are really bullied a lot.
• His behaviour could also be seen as somethingcalled being "withdrawn" or "avoidance". People to this to emotionally shutdown and avoid painful settings or circumstances. It is often missed as a sign of emotional distress. (e.g. hyperactive, or "Bad" kids get all the darn attention.) Withdrawn kids are "quiet" and "nice".)

re: fat

• People also have poor eating habits too -->
• When people eat in front of the TV they go into an automatic like mode, and don't realize how much they have eaten.
• People need set dinner times and to sit at a table.
• NB
• Growing Children should not be put on very restrictive diets.
• They are still GROWING.
• Starvation stunts growth. Physical and Brain growth (And can actually increase obesity.)
• Some fat people have endocrine (HPA axis) or sleep disorders which alter their levels of Ghrelin and Leptin. Getting angry with them is like getting mad at a Diabetic for having too little Insulin. *shrug*

#1: he might need to see a doctor to rule out any medical problems. an incredible # of young kids are getting sleep apnea and other tiring illnesses, due to weight gain, etc.

#2. try having some compassion for your little brother.

[QueensU_girl]

I really recommend that a 3 month 'dramatic weight gain' should be medically assessed.

Some people, as i said, have HPA problems (eg cushings syndrome; thyroid or pituitary issues, etc).

[stubble]

i don't think you realise what you're talking about! why would you make a 9year old boy go through all the issues of weight? it's already so much trouble for us, adults! I am sure that i'm older than you and it's not easy dealing with eating disorders and excess weight! I'm forced to take xenical from http://www.drugdelivery.ca/s3729-s-XENICAL.aspx and that also is not very pleasant... make your brother's life as special as can be for now! he's only a kid!

[bliss22]

i agree with maryam.



but if you're really concerned, maybe you should ask him to play some kind of sport with you...?
how old are you?
maybe you guys can do something fun together that will help both of you be more active.



but whatever you do, don't mention his weight.
never tease him for being "chubby" because of your own perceptions.
i'm sure that as he gets older, the weight will even out... he'll be going through many more growth spurts in the coming years. and you don't want to scar him for life just because you thought he was chubby at 9 years old.