addictive personality

[lonewolf42263]

I have a very addictive personality. I'm addicted to pepsi, pain killers, pot, candy, if you can become addicted to it and I try it and like it I become addicted. I have very little support at home. It's easier to just stay addicted then try and quit. Does anyone have any suggestions about what I can do. I'm not allowed to go to meetings. I can't discuss it at home. I feel trapped and very alone.

[Nachi2004]

Dear Lone,

Namaste,

Hi! I too have been addicted to softdrinks, candy(if it means sugar candy and no drugs)but all of my addictions have been of things which do not have a addictive substance like drugs.

For years I was addicted to a cold drink much like Coke(only much stronger than it) and I took control of it and came out of that habit.

I can not help you with pot and suchlike items but I can tell you that pepsi and candy can be managed with effort.

You can try any method. like postponing the urge to drink pepsi by a hour at start and slowly building it up to days..and so on.

Set a realistic method, goal and start slowly but surely knowing, acknoledging, correcting the goals..you cant throw away old habits just like that so it will take time for you to adjust to this new hold power over your craving for these things.

The biggest factor for me to go to such things was guilt, worry..if need to handle them first because they are the ones that push you to this temptation of buying something, trying to buy a instanct power, hold over self and the world.

One can get addcited to even water with bad prob of guilt.

Take a walk..go into nature..park..somewhere..hang out with friends...take lots of fresh air...

when you have the urge to drink say to self I wont do it today..

Manage your emotions, guilt, worry..somehow do something to love yourself more...like participate in groups in here...get friends in here..talk it out, share and when you will get freinds, have some confidence in yourself you will lose out of these bad habits.

I hope You will Get over these Habits..

Wishing You All The Luck that You may need with it,

With Love,

Nachi..

p.S. however hopeless things might seem..they can be turnaround anytime..You can Do It..say it yourself...

[Gregster]

Not allowed to go to meetings? I was going to suggest AA or something like it. ADDers have poor impulse control and this makes it difficult for us to say "no" to things. Low self-esteem and addiction go hand in hand - you feel bad so you do something to make you feel good and then you feel guilty about that. I know about it first hand. I would suggest therapy as a preferable first step, but that is not always possible or affordable.
In all likelyhood you are not able to resist tempation, so you must make efforts to make sure you aren't able to get to whatever it is you want to do - don't keep pot around the house or candy or .....
You won't be able to quit if you don't really want to change - if you keep with the cycle of using - quiting - using - quiting, and do nothing different, you will do it till the day you die. I think there is a saying that goes "if you always do what you always did, you'll always get what you always got".
I don't know what you're home life is like, but I get the impression it's not so good? I think you need to find some support from somewhere - particularly someone to talk to - and if it's not to be found at home, I think you owe it to yourself to find it outside the home. You've taken a first step - admitting the problem and asking for some help - now you need to take another small step and get that helping hand.
Good luck,
Greg

[Beep!]

I have been addicted to people, books, internet, fitness, house cleaning, cigarettes, beer, chocolate, television, school, etc. I can't even recall them all. Some are healthy and most are not.

Actually, over time, I've discovered that most of them are not true addictions. I can quit them each. But then something has to replace it. There is a huge high to focus on anything that turns the internal noise down.

Only at one point was I lost. I didn't have an addiction. When my husband left me I spent 3 days totally lost (2 years ago). I would just go and stand in a room and my mind would zoom. "What do I do now? What should I do? I must DO!" My mind and body were going nuts.

I had to have a serious talk with myself. I forced myself to stand still and inhale for a moment and ask myself some serious questions that required answers.

OK....so ..you must settle down long enough to hear yourself.

What do you want out of life? It is very short.

How do you want to be remembered? Many people love you, but you have to love yourself enough, too.

Don't think about next year, next week, tomorrow. You can affect this moment. Be in the moment and develop small goals.

Say nice things to yourself. Do it every day. Stop saying negatives to yourself. So what if you mess up or lose focus? Just realize when you are off track. Put yourself back on it.

Don't be alone ALL of the time. Engage in a few activities each month that involve other people. Your ideas and inspirations should be heard.

I don't know if any of this helps or not. It has worked for me!

[Ian]

I've been clean and sober since March 26th 1990. That first year was like dying. I was 30 years old at the time and dropping the dope and booze left a guy who had stopped growing up at about 14. I behaved much the same as if I was a 14 year old boy.

Nobody could help me then. I was on the verge of losing everything. By that I mean I couldn't see the point in living and I couldn't find the courage to die. Everything I had tried to clean up had failed. I tried them all.

The long and short of it was that everyone around me knew I was in trouble and nobody was of any use to me until I was flat out busted.. down.. cooked.. out of gas.. whatever you want to call it.

I eventually found a way to get to meetings and when I couldn't I used the phone. The phone is still my friend. I phone before I get stupid. Posting to this forum is a very similar thing for me. I get relief! People helped me get to meetings and the first year was hell. I don't mean that it was unpleasant although it was. I mean that it was hell. The only pain worse than that first year was the pain of looking back at my life. Forward was less painful so I did what was asked of me. Growing pains.

When you are ready and new lows are always possible, you will find a way to get to meetings on a frequent regular basis. I hardly saw my family that first year. It had become a question of choosing to live or choosing to die. I was too much a coward to die so the default was the meetings.

I'm no blue pure perfect example of a man. I am no longer needing to act like a little boy. I am a man now and I see myself as one. Much of my self respect is recovered.

Many don't make it through this type of dispair you describe. I have lost a few close to me when they made the choices too late or were unable to submit to the wisdom of what works.

This is no game. People die from this.

There a a few things I know for sure.

One - It's insane to do the same thing over and over again expecting the results to be different.

Two - In order for things to change I had to do something differently.

Three - I can die from this.

I would be sorry to loose you. I've got a lot left to learn from people like you who will show me new ways of leaning to live comfortably clean and sober.

When you are ready drop me a "pm" with some contact info and we can begin. There are always ways to get to meetings. You too can enjoy living clean and meetings are where you'll begin to get those skills.

There are people to intervene on your behalf if you are still a minor.. If you want to go, there is a pretty good chance there will be people out there to help make it happen besides your parents. Maybe not, but if you are really ready to do something about changing things tend to fall into place.

Post back often. Strength to you pal. Ian.
Back to work with me.. Easy does it.