Woman with ADD wonders if there's a different tolerance level between the sexes

[fasttalkingmom]

In general do you think men tend to be more tolertant about differences in people than women are?......

Asking this question because I see so many man on our board having troubles with the women in their lives being tolertant of ADD and it's got me feeling badly.

What do you think? Is it a personality thing or that women are less tolertant of differences than men are ?....

As a women I know I've had troubles being treated badly by men not so much because of my ADD as much as it's a lack of self esteem, that I do feel I had due to ADD.... or is this all the same thing?.....

[fasttalkingmom]

Sorry.... this was a lame post..

[Draga]

Fast...Not a lame question at all, I have had very bad times with men because or my low self esteem and my ADHD they thought that that meant they could treat me anyway they wanted and that means. These have been Non ADD men....Some ADD men seem to understand ADD women and other men...some women may not be able to tolerate are the who Love to invite you to there Pity Party or are just act like hornballs...Like some Non ADD men May find it hard to understand and Tolerate ADD women..it can be vice versa too I think it depends on the person....Me hope this not a lame answer.

[MRB]

NOT LAME POST NOT LAME POST

Here's what I think that I think (backed up by no science whatsoever). I think women in our society are harder on themselves, and encouraged to be so by society at large. I think that tends to extend to women thinking that people behaving badly in their families "reflecting on them" - which is not terribly rational but is what women are encouraged to think. So I think that tends to affect their tolerance levels.

I say that also b/c I've heard women tear other women apart behind their backs for nonADD-related issues (like hair, weight, other aspects of appearance) which also makes me think we're just harder on each other 1) b/c we see ourselves potentially in the ostracized person and are afraid of that and 2) if we can "exclude" that person by virtue of a perceived "fault" that solidifies our "membership" in our own peer group. I've seen it happen in groups as young as 3rd grade and as old as senior citizen women's groups. End ramble.

Did that make any sense at all?

[fasttalkingmom]

Very good MRB ! ........ I agree and you said it better than I could.... Thanks

Paula

[krisp]

Very well said, MRB!

[Nucking_Futs]

Very well said indeed. That is why I can honestly say I feel safe at the forum's I believe the men and women have EVOLVED so to speak and know that comfort will only bring comfort. I never feel as if someone is stabbing me in my back here.

[E-boy]

I think women are the crown of creation and the finest and most noble creatures walking this earth. Just ask any five year old. I'm not say that just because they have boobs and I have a penis either!

Seriously, I genuinely feel that the best of what it is to be a human being is embodied in women. Not every woman mind you. There are evil human beings who happen to be women. But women bring life into this world, they are the nurturers, the teachers, they are aesthetic in every way that means anything to me. When you come right down to it, past all the intellectual, artistic, and spiritual concerns, deep into the primitive animal part of me, they are also just plain attractive and they smell good too. ;-)

[E-boy]

Robin isn't always easy on me, but without her and the kids my life would be a very very dark place. She is my Goddess.

[fasttalkingmom]

Originally posted by E-boy
She is my Goddess.

You got that right Mister and don't you forget it either....

[E-boy]

Last time I did I slept on the couch at a funny angle 'cause I had a lightning bolt and a high heel protruding out of my butt at a funny angle.

Gotta love all that concentrated nurturing. ;-)

Lord knows why she loves me when she thinks I am the way I am on purpose, but she does.

[fasttalkingmom]

OMG !! Eboy your the best !!

Not sure I like the visual I now have in my head ...lol...


What color high heel, I hope it didn't clash with your P.J. ? ...lol...


just kidding

[E-boy]

The best lightning bolt receptacle? Personally, I kind of thought that particular orifice had better uses that didn't involve being violated by natures fury, but what do I know?

[MRB]

Thanks for the compliments, you guys. I love to come here b/c people don't look at me (or "post" at me ) like I'm an idiot who doesn't make sense. Like Futs said, it's very comforting.

I think comfort and support are highly underrated.

[E-boy]

Yeah, well it's kind of hard to get comfortable with a jagged ol' lightning bolt sticking out of your butt. I'm glad someone's comfy though! SIGH!

Just kidding, I'm glad to hear you feel supported here. I'm in the wrong place to be responding because I'm short an "X" chromosome but your in good company and we all have common ground here. By the way, having ADD does not make anyone an idiot. Idiots are people who are too tied up in their own way of thinking to understand there are different ways of thinking.