Overwhelmed... by the forum?

[Spacemeat]

As I write this, it's 12:45 AM and I need to get up by eight. This isn't specifically relevant to my post... outside of it being another example of how I lose track of time! Heck, I meant to make supper around 5:30 PM but instead ended up eating around nine o'clock because I was sitting in front of the computer and I lost track of time. Days pass by like this, which turn into weeks, which turn into months, which turn into years; I have spent entire years struggling to do something--anything--with my time.

Not exactly good for the self-esteem!

In any event, the problem I am facing right now is that I am 28 and in university and I was recently diagnosed with ADHD (Primarily Inattentive type) as well as a "processing speed" learning disability (which I don't fully understand and would love to hear others' thoughts regarding). I am in a pickle in that I have schoolwork piling up by the truckload, and yet I can't seem to motivate myself to even start any of it. This is what you'd more than likely dub 'avoidant behaviour,' and I'd have trouble debating such a diagnosis. Still, it's embarrassing, because nothing appears to be holding me back, often leading to friends and family members as frustrated with me as I am with myself! And school is the only thing on my plate; I have few friends, an almost non-existent social life, and no hobbies of note to speak of. I'd love to have those things too, but I have wound up a shut-in (and yet I'm affable, kind, intelligent, funny, and not exactly hideous either).

So, here I am. I have started seeing a psychologist who specializes in learning disorders, I've been prescribed Concerta (36mg this week, 54mg beyond that), and I have a couple of books on the subject that I ought to probably read at some point (You Mean I'm Not Lazy, Stupid or Crazy? as well as Driven to Distraction). But there is so much information, so many theories, so many treatments and so forth that I'm finding myself entirely overwhelmed already! Has anyone else felt this way? Does anyone else feel this way currently? Because as it stands, I'm looking at the posts and the traffic, the number of sub-forums, the discussions of neurobiology and hypotheses and available medications... and feeling paralysed! I want to ensure that I am doing everything within my power to work with whatever disabilities I have, not make my life more difficult than it needs to be. I'm not sure how to do that, though, and it seems few others are either; we're all guessing and struggling and experimenting, and it reminds me of just how young and unknown ADHD truly is. I want to understand whatever it is that I'm living with, but now I don't know if that's possible. Then again, I am known for being easily discouraged in life...

I hope this has been posted in the appropriate location! And thanks in advance to anyone who has any advice or - well, anything. If what I have said is even remotely coherent, I'll consider this post a success!

[wsmac]

I found that I could only get my homework done if I did it at school.
Our library has rooms you can check out for 2 hours.
They are large enough to accommodate several people, have whiteboards, and some have A/V equipment and computers.

That and empty classrooms are my favorite places to work.

If I try to do work off campus, I'm much more likely to not get much, if anything, done.

I'm out this semester... academic probation again... but when I go back, I'm going to try out using a tutor.
Some folks here have used them with success.
I am hoping that having a commitment to someone who can actually help me understand certain subjects, will see me through a whole semester.

That's all I have to offer... wish it were more.

[engineer]

As far as the sense of being overwhelmed, for me it helps immensely to try to simplify things. If there are a lot of things that need to be done or that you'd like to learn or whatever, whether it's regarding school or ADD forums or anything, it often helps to just make a list of the things that you want to do. Having a list of things helps me get my mind off of those things. Instead of worrying about everything, I know, "Hey, it's on the list. Once I check off this other thing on the list, I can move on to the next one." I don't have to worry about everything all at once.

Although, something that still gives me problems is when I have something to do that's #1 priority over everything else... Like a research paper... that's due in two days. Then I get all anxious and end up putting it off and putting it off and I can't work on anything else that's productive because I keep thinking to myself that I've got to work on this big project, but I don't want to, so I just end up wasting time. And it gets worse as I get closer to the deadline.

But sometimes I still manage to keep things like that from bothering me too much if I can just get myself to start working on it before it becomes urgent.

Simple is good. Get all the mess out of your head and organized onto paper (or on your computer or cell phone or whatever).

Hope this helps... (now let me see if I can get myself back to doing that project that's due tomorrow...)

[stef]

I agree, simplify but that's not always possible! also it helps to just ACCEPT that you may feel overwhelmed. That feeling will go away faster if you don't dwell on it. Pretty soon you'll be distracted by something and start thinking about it, and then another thing - and suddenly you're out of the terrible feeling.

Yikes, for the forums, just hit "new posts". I never go through the subforums, there's just too much info...

[innaminute]

Spacemeat, yeah, I once got overwhelmed by the forums.

Much like stef said, I usually look at new posts. I now have a method to my forum madness.

If I'm on the front page of the site, I'll mouse over each new post heading. If it looks like something I'm interested in, I'll open it in a new tab.

Then I go into the actual Forums link on the left.

I'll look to see the newest post title on the right and again, if it looks like something I might be interested, I open it in a new tab.

If I'm on a specific medication (when I was starting Strattera, for example), I'd then open the Strattera forum in a new tab.

And finally, to see if people responded to my posts, I'll go into my profile, hit my statistics tab, and hit "find all posts by innaminute".

This will generally open maybe 10 tabs and I can read each one and then be done with it. It keeps the signal to noise ratio down quite a bit and I can get through this in about 20 - 30 minutes.

What engineer suggested is a great idea - make a list of all the things you want to research/learn on ADD, that way you don't end up going down twenty paths at once.

Good luck!

[mADD mike]

I just realized a little over a week ago that the forums here were becoming too much of my life. So, I logged off, and this is the first time I've logged in for over a week. I find that if I'm logged off, I'm less likely to post and get involved in things that take my time and attention away from making real progress in life, as opposed to talking on the forums unless the urge strikes. I've even made myself not respond to things simply to reign in some impulsiveness.

In doing so, I've been much more productive in other areas of life. Started working out again (man am I sore!) and my mood has elevated tremendously.

These forums can get overwhelming. Let's face it, most people don't come here with inspiring stories and positivity, and the tone of the forums can get people that are already predisposed to depression down (raises hand), and can also waste time just as much as they help us to be more productive with it by getting tips from others.

Balance is the key in all areas of life. ADDers are typically all or nothing thinkers. These forums, school, work, etc. all require a balancing act, otherwise we'll get sucked into one and it will be to the detriment of something else, hard to do for people that are easily distracted.

Mike

[letsrockit]

Hi amd welcome to the forums!

I have ADD-PI also, and struggle with getting work started. Yes, there is nothing really holding me back, it's like there is some internal 'red light' that is constantly on which stops me from accomplishing anything.

It is frustrating indeed.

I am on Concerta - 72 mg. and it was helping ALOT for the first few weeks I was on that dose....now, sadly, it seems my body/brain has built a tolerance to the medication and I am noticing the 'avoidance' behaviors taking over again

As such, I now spend too much time at work on this forum (I just can't NOT look on here every 20 mins - pathetic, I know) and I have A TON of MAJOR-PRIORITY projects to be doing.

Anyway, let us know how things progess on the meds..I suspect you will see a HUGE difference.

[Spacemeat]

Thank you, one and all, for your feedback! Unsurprisingly, I suppose, it appears that many folks have been--or are in--the same boat that I am in right now. This all started because I looked across the forum's landscape and immediately saw its potential as yet another distraction that could cost me hours and hours and hours.

I think switching environments so that I am, say, trying to get more work done while at school is a good idea. The problem is that I often don't even make it to class! I suspect that it's a mixture of social anxieties with a bit of shame for being so far behind in my studies that does me in. Nonetheless, I know that something in my routine needs to change at this point. I'm not productive at all.

[CircularingCats]

Hi Spacemeat,

About your school classes and coursework, I would at least try to do some work, as much as you can manage. You don't actually want to throw the towel in do you? That's why you're writing this post now.

If I were you, I would at least try to face your anxieties about going to class. Usually in the upper levels of school, showing up is important so that the professor gets to see your face regularly and know your presence. Only you will really know that you are quite far behind in class because I'd imagine students are not called on in class the same way you are in grade school and h.s. So to try to salvage some of your education would be a good first step.

Maybe you can then collect yourself enough and get enough coursework done to somehow keep abreast or nearly so with your class. Or, if not, maybe you can request an incomplete grade, which is better than a failing one, and which would allow you additional time to complete the class and get a grade for your efforts so all is not lost.

(And, by showing up in class, your teacher knows your face and is more likely to give you the incomplete grade opportunity, should you choose to go that route.)

[Cacho]

First off, actually seeing a psychologist and getting help is already a huge step in the right direction, in my opinion.

In addition to all the good advice in this thread, writing stuff down often helps me at least not feel quite so overwhelmed.

Try and break things into small chunks and write them down.

You'll have to do this multiple times. So maybe a diary, journal, blog, whatever is most natural to you.

For example, if you want to take the advice of doing your work at school you could write something like.

- The most important thing to me right now is to do better at school
- My first step to do this will be to start doing my homework at school, in the central library
- I'm doing worst in Math 101, so I will first concentrate on that class
- After classes today I will go to the library, with the study material for my 101 Math class and work for 2 hours

Etc ad nauseum. The trick is that your first thoughts will be large, vague, and completely overwhelming. Keep thinking about them until you've broken them down to one first doable step that you write down, like the example above.

Writing things down will help you track your progress and organize your thoughts.

The trick to not feeling overwhelmed is to break things down into little chunks and pick what is most important to you. Realize that this, by definition, entails choosing what is NOT important to you, and this can be stressful. I've found writing things down helps me work through a lot of this stress.

PS - Studying w friends was SOMETIMES helpful for me in college. I say sometimes, since it really depended on who with, where, what subject, etc.

[Spacemeat]

Thanks again for your feedback, folks.

It seems that with such a wealth of information out there, and so many conflicting ideas not only about ADHD-PI but also its associated processing speed disability, I was simply finding myself overwhelmed.

In the interim, I think I'll watch that lecture (ugh, it's so long though!) featuring Dr. Barkley that someone else kindly linked to in another thread, read You Mean I'm Not Crazy, Stupid or Lazy?, and after that I'll come back if there are any unanswered questions.

Insofar as those suggestions are concerned...

My "coordinator" (as she is called) at the university's students-with-disabilities centre has talked me into dropping one of my classes for now and focusing instead on doing all I can to salvage the other two.

I have been trying to keep up with the positive self-reinforcement somewhat, as silly and patronizing as I sometimes feel in doing so.

I am also going to restructure my 'game plan' (to-do list, in other words - but one wherein all of my schoolwork is broken up into manageable chunks) to coincide with the dropping of that one course. We'll see how that goes.

For now, it's off to see my therapist. We'll see what he suggests.