Woman with ADD - need help finding help for ADD.

[jac_crazyinside]

Hi, I am new to this forum but not new to ADD.

I've been suffering with ADD since my Dad was diagnosed when I was in high school. But I got through college and thought I finally had it under control. (This is the short version) Then my boss pulled me aside two weeks ago to discuss my communication issues. I am a loose cannon, they said... I don't listen. So now I have a VERY BAD letter in my HR file and 30 days to fix the situation. I am almost completly overwhelmed at work -- ok, I am completly overwhelmed and to top it off I have been going through a tough time with my boyfriend (who I live with) for the past few months. He just doesn't get it. My mom is on my case and my Dad is... well, supportive in his own special way. Concerta isn't a magic pill afterall.

I need help.

I don't want to cry anymore.
I can't cry anymore.
I am tired of pretending that I have it together.
I am tired of making excuses for my behavior.
I have had to apologize for my behavior too many times.
I hate that I say stupid things and don't realize it until some tells me.
I hate that I have to be told to set my alarm and plug in my cell phone.
I am tired of the pile of dishes in the sink and the clothes on the floor.
I am tired of being alone.. why don't I have any friends?!
AND I don't want to get fired.

My greatest fear in life is becoming my Dad... my Dad who dragged my mother and I across the country as he was fired and hired, fired and hired...

So yeah, I'll say it now.. I need help and I need help finding help...

I have been reading about support groups but I am not sure I am ready for that. I need to talk to someone in person. I think I might benefit from working with a theripist who specializes in Adult ADD, better yet, Adult ADD in women -- but I have no idea where to even begin looking for someone in the New York area. The idea of a coach sounds great but I'll never be able to afford it.

Are there any specialized help I can get that might be covered by my health insurance (that is if I still have health insurance in 30 days...)?

Are there any live suppot groups for women in the city?

[Tara]

Have you taken a look at the NY regional forum? I also have the name of a therapist in the NYC are who works with Women with ADD. I will send you a pm with her info Tommorow or Wednesday when I get home.

[jac_crazyinside]

Thank you "livingwithadd"

I hate to see how desperate I seem in this post, but this is the second night in a row I am stilling at home, alone, with tears streaming down my face. I just found out today that I really insulted one of my friends at work on Friday, and I didn't even realize it. I noticed today that he was acting a little cold toward me so I asked him. Figured what ever he was going to tell me could not be any worse than the sinarious going through my parinoid head. Turns out it was. Its always something... does it ever get better?

[paulbf]

Yes it'll get better. You are dealing with it now. Hope to hear more from you here but short term I suggest intensive therapy (a couple times a week at least) to help you calm down and get all this sorted out so you can manage the job.

Best wishes jac!

[MRB]

There is an article somewhere about a clinic at NYU that works with adults as well as children for ADD. Of course I've forgotten where it is, but I will post once I find it again. OH! Now I remember. Last week's New York Times, magazine section.


Meanwhile, check out www.maaddsg.org

Have you disclosed to HR? If there has allegedly been a problem identified, it needs to be described in sufficiently specific terms WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE WHEN YOU IMPROVE ENOUGH TO KEEP YOUR POSITION. I have found that New York firms are notorious about leaving this out. And if you decide to disclose, MAKE HR assist you in finding some help - comes under the heading of "reasonable accommodations".

Good luck.