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Old 12-11-10, 02:24 PM
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Unhappy New here and NEED your opinions and advice

Hello everyone,I’m happy I finally registered on this forum,I think it’s very helpfull for people to share their own experiences,opinions and advices. I read this forum almost a year since I first thought that I may have ADHD.


As I said about a year ago, I watched a movie called „Thumbsucker“. It is a movie about a boy with ADHD who was put on Ritalin. I could relate so much with him,cause I was always shy,nervous,had difficulities expressing myself and controlling my emotions. I had and still have a habit of biting my nails.


My teacher in elementary school once told me that I look deranged,cause I often lose track about topic. The truth is I lived with some kind of mask in front of other people,everyone though I’m quiet but I coudn’t sit still,couldn’t concentrate in classes. But somehow I managed to hide how I feel and nobody noticed that I’m struggling inside. It was very,very difficult for me.


Three years ago I started cracking, I coudn’t take it anymore cause it was worse and worse every day. I started with some alternative methods like meditation,but it wasn’t very helpfull. I also tried autosuggestion, relaxation methods, St.Jones worth but I didn’t feel any better. I felt like I’m going crazy and there is no way out.

I thought it’s some kind of anxiety disorder,but after watching that movie a year ago, I did a research on ADHD and could relate to a lot of symptoms.


- I can’t stay focused on conversation.

- I’m easy distracted,I pay attention on everything around me,I’m too aware and have high self-consciousness about every my move and everything I do or say.

- I’m always over-analyzing,thinking too deep and too much. I can’t stop my brain. Sometimes I feel like I’m thinking about million things in the same time and then I forget what I was primary thinking about. With so many thoughts I feel like going crazy and like my head is going to explode. I also have some obsessive and repetitive thoughts like some sort of autosuggestion.

- I often forget what I wanted to say.

- Also I feel like something is flying in my head. It’s hard to explain,and it’s weird, but for example, when I’m reading I feel like my mind and eyes are wandering and can’t stay focused on letters. Like a ball is bumping inside my head.

- I have difficulity reading and watching movies (even if it’s interesting),working on my computer, generally staying on track. I just want to get up and walk or do something dynamic.

- It’s hard for me to start doing some task and even when I start doing it,I almost never finish it. Some things I started are still waiting for me but I’m always procrastinating.

- As regard organization,I’m obsesed with being perfectly organized cause if I’m not, I feel lost. I can’t find anything,so I tend to always keep things on its place. My room is sometimes messy,but it’s important for me to be able to find what I need. I would be probably disorganized if I’m not so obsesed with that,maybe because of fear of losing something or don’t knowing where is something.

- Now when my state got worse I have big trouble controling my emotions. Before it was easier,but now I just can’t. I’m also very impulsive and have poor self-control.

- I can’t sit still and am always restless,fidgeting,shaking legs,playing with something in my hands.I feel like I have a lot of adrenaline.

- When I was younger I did some risky things without thinking. Now I can stop myself from doing such things.

- I can’t stand criticism,have low self-esteem now even more then it was before.

- It’s hard for me to function in a group of people, I’m more of individualist and I feel unpleasantly when I’m with some familiars or friends and fidgeting all the time. I’m afraid they will think I’m neurotic.

- I don’t deal well with frustrations,can’t control my anger,stress situations realy affect me a lot.

- I have mood swings,but most of the time I feel bad and upset. I feel good only when I do something creative or listen to music.

- I’m very impatient

- I have no motivation.

- I have panic attacks without these meds I’m taking.

Two weeks ago I finally went to doctor. He told me I have anxiety disorder and prescribed me Paxil and Clonazepam. I’m also taking fish oil capsules. I feel calmer and think slower, but I don’t know if this is correct diagnosis. Some things didn’t change.

I’m realy sorry for such a long post,I hope you'll have patience to read this and help me, but I can’t talk to anyone except my doctor and would like to hear opinions of people who are in the same position. After all, you understand the best because you are going through the same. If I tell someone in my surrounding, they will say I’m crazy,that it’s all in my head and I can solve it easy . I tried to help myself but I guess something is wrong in my brain. I just want to be calm and free.

I have some questions for you:
1. Is it possible to be diagnosed with ADHD as an adult cause my doctor said that’s impossible?

2. How do you feel if you try to sit still and not act hyperactive?

3. Do you think those meds I’m taking can help me with ADHD or it can become worse?

4. What is your experience with fish oil,does it realy help ADHD?

5. Do you have to be on treatment for whole life?

I look forward to see your answers. If I come up with some more questions I’ll write it.

Thank you in advance. God bless you all.

Last edited by meridian; 12-11-10 at 03:24 PM.. Reason: added additional line breaks
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  #2  
Old 12-11-10, 03:31 PM
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Re: New here and NEED your opinions and advice

Hi brainstorm07 and welcome to the Forums.

I believe what your doctor meant to say is that if you did not have AD/HD symptoms as a child, then you "can't" have Adult AD/HD. This is the present medical thinking.

However if he was saying that there is no such thing as Adult AD/HD, I think he'd be wrong about that.

If he doesn't believe that Adult AD/HD exists at all find a new Doctor!

If he thinks you cannot have it now because you were never diagnosed in childhood, then he is behind on his reading!
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  #3  
Old 12-11-10, 04:01 PM
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Re: New here and NEED your opinions and advice

Hi brainstorm. I wasn't diagnosed as a child either, partly because there were very few doctors who recognized this disorder back in the 50's and 60's, and my parents didn't have a clue what was wrong with me besides being too emotional, easily distracted, impulsive, forgetful, and being unable to finish things or even get started much of the time.

So, your doctor has you on two meds to deal with anxiety and depression? Undiagnosed and untreated ADHD can cause, or exacerbate, both of those issues. However, many doctors prefer to deal with those first and then see if there is some underlying condition like ADHD. I believe it's very difficult to be diagnosed with ADHD as an adult in Europe - it's becoming better understood here in the States but we've still got a ways to go.

I don't take any prescription meds except for my hypertension, but I've found Omega 3 (fish oil) supplements to be very helpful. Not everyone does, but some say the way they help level moods is worth it even if they don't improve focus and concentration.

The meds you're taking won't make ADHD worse if you actually have it (and your problems sure sound very familiar to me). And no, you don't have to be on meds your whole life to treat ADHD - or Anxiety or Depression. The meds can help you focus so that you can learn better skills and possibly be able to stop taking the meds. That seems to play out better for those who have less severe cases of ADHD. More severe cases often do take stimulant meds for many, many years.
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Old 12-11-10, 07:57 PM
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Re: New here and NEED your opinions and advice

Thank you guys very much for your answers
So,do you think that those symptoms that I had as a child (written in introduction post) could be symptoms of ADHD?
And how do you feel when you are hyper but try not to act hyper? I feel like strong pressure in my head and intense urge to move. I supose that over the years living with ADHD caused anxiety,panic attacks in my case. Thats just my assumption.
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Old 12-11-10, 09:32 PM
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Re: New here and NEED your opinions and advice

I said your symptoms sounded very familiar to me, and I'm 100% certain I've always had ADHD (combined type). Also, let your doctor set the pace here, try the anti-depressant and anti-anxiety meds and then you'll be able to tell the doctor whether there are still some problems that need to be addressed.

I'm not bouncing off the walls hyper myself, more swinging my leg, tapping my foot or my finger, twirling my hair, rocking back and forth. Drove my mom batty when I was a kid. Good thing for her I wasn't more hyper than that, eh?

I don't think the meds you're taking are going to help with the hyper stuff, and that's going to be one of the things you'll have to talk to the doctor about. I can tell a big difference in my granddaughters hyper-ness medicated and non-medicated.
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Old 12-12-10, 11:50 AM
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Re: New here and NEED your opinions and advice

Hi, Brainstorm.
I can relate to a lot of your symptoms and I also was not diagnosed with ADD until a few days ago and I am 33, so yes, you can be diagnosed as an adult. One doctor suspected years ago that I was ADD, but I was drinking heavily at the time, and I didn't let him test me because I was afraid he would find out that I was an alcoholic! LOL.
Anyways, after a year sober I also started to crumble. Without the booze as a crutch I had to face the facts that I didn't think the same way others did.
As far as the fish oil, I couldn't tell ya. I've been taking it for years for heart health but don't notice any difference in the mental calamity when I forget to take it.
I've been on Adderall for a few days and am noticing a little improvement with motivation and getting things done "one at a time".

Good luck!
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Last edited by meridian; 12-13-10 at 09:43 PM.. Reason: fixed a small typo
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Old 12-12-10, 11:51 AM
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Re: New here and NEED your opinions and advice

I already was on check-up a few days ago and said to my doctor that Paxil isn't helping with hyper thing,just make me sleepy,but although I'm sleepy, I still have those symptoms that @Lunacie wrote. I have even less motivation with Paxil and have no energy or feelings,like the med killed my feelings and creativity. The only good thing is it makes me think slower cause my head is in chaos. Then doctor put me on Clonazepam(Klonopin) for hyperactivity,he says it's only nervousness. It helps a little bit, but not wholly. I can't convince him that it's maybe ADHD cause I have to much symptoms that indicate to it.
Is there any way to make sure if I have ADHD or any other disorder? Some scan, test or anything?
Thank you for helping me.
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Old 12-13-10, 12:45 AM
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Re: New here and NEED your opinions and advice

Please please, someone respond me to the question I wrote in a post above.
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Old 12-13-10, 10:54 AM
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Re: New here and NEED your opinions and advice

I guess none of the hyper people have been on here yet.

I will say that my granddaughter wasn't terribly hyperactive in that she couldn't sit still, but there was a lot of leg swinging, foot tapping, and bouncing in her chair. And that became less noticable when she started taking stimulant meds. Could be she was just getting older, but I think the meds had something to do with it.

I know it can be much harder to get a diagnosis of ADHD as an adult in Europe. I think you should get that process started and find out if you truly have ADHD or some other problem.
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Old 12-13-10, 09:49 PM
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Re: New here and NEED your opinions and advice

Quote:
Originally Posted by brainstorm07 View Post
I can't convince him that it's maybe ADHD cause I have to much symptoms that indicate to it.
Is there any way to make sure if I have ADHD or any other disorder? Some scan, test or anything?
Thank you for helping me.
There are some doctors (Dr. Daniel Amen comes to mind) who use SPECT scans but they are expensive and not definitive.

There is no particular brain scan that can rule AD/HD in or out -- and as many as 80% of people with AD/HD also have another "co-morbid" condition which also needs treatment, but the simple 18 point self assessment test for AD/HD has been used by many doctors. Here's a link . . .

http://webdoc.nyumc.org/nyumc/files/..._checklist.pdf

Best of luck!
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Old 12-15-10, 06:30 PM
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Re: New here and NEED your opinions and advice

Quote:
Originally Posted by brainstorm07 View Post
I already was on check-up a few days ago and said to my doctor that Paxil isn't helping with hyper thing,just make me sleepy,but although I'm sleepy, I still have those symptoms that @Lunacie wrote. I have even less motivation with Paxil and have no energy or feelings,like the med killed my feelings and creativity. The only good thing is it makes me think slower cause my head is in chaos. Then doctor put me on Clonazepam(Klonopin) for hyperactivity,he says it's only nervousness. It helps a little bit, but not wholly. I can't convince him that it's maybe ADHD cause I have to much symptoms that indicate to it.
Is there any way to make sure if I have ADHD or any other disorder? Some scan, test or anything?
Thank you for helping me.
Did you undergo an assessment for ADHD specifically?
This generally requires a specialist. I suppose you could use the internet or conventional media to find such a doctor, but I went to a mental health clinic here in Canada and just asked if they could refer me to anyone who can perform an ADD assessment.

Anyways. I'm still waiting for my assessment and I will be for another 6 months (the Canadian government provides them for free, but because I'm self-employed, not struggling and not otherwise in an emergency, I get the back of the line). So anyways. Now I self medicate.

Ephedrine worked really well for me at first. I picked some up at a health food store.

They I got some dexedrine, phenylpiracetam and vyvanse. Two of the three were illegally acquired, but yeah lol, (some of them) work great.

He gave you an SSRI antidepressant and a benzo, so he's treating you for severe depression or severe social anxiety or PTSD or OCD or a mild delusional schizophrenic subcondition, like the Truman syndrome.

I hope I don't get cr@p (again) for suggesting self-medication as an option from anyone. I get a lot of "hey man, you're not a doctor" responses. And I'm not.
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Old 12-15-10, 10:54 PM
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Re: New here and NEED your opinions and advice

SSRI is for severe anxiety, that's my diagnosis. It's helping me a lot, I feel calmer now. And about benzo (Klonopin),doctor said it will slow me down and stop my fidgeting cause he thinks my fidgeting and hyperness is product of anxiety.
I also had strong panic attacks so this med helps me with that issue, benzos are great for panic attacks. But the problem is I still have ADHD symptoms. I will sure talk about that with my psychiatrist and try to find a solution. I think I have comorbid case.
I wouldn't dare to self-medicate, I don't wanna mess up with my brain. It's already messed up a lot.
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Old 12-15-10, 11:33 PM
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Re: New here and NEED your opinions and advice

I am a newbie here and just wanna say Hi to everyone. I am Daniel from Pennsylvania, US.


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Old 12-15-10, 11:38 PM
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Re: New here and NEED your opinions and advice

I personally can't relate to panic attacks at all. When you have a panic attack to you openly panic and feel the need to express your emotion or do you "bottle it up" so to speak?

Have you suggested that you might have overlapping anxiety and ADHD issues to your doctor?

I never seem to get depressed, but I hear girls with ADHD do frequently and without cause.
Do you drink a lot of coffee?
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Old 12-15-10, 11:42 PM
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Re: New here and NEED your opinions and advice

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I am a newbie here and just wanna say Hi to everyone. I am Daniel from Pennsylvania, US.
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daniel!

Nice backlink!
You'll be interested to know that the META keywords tag on your site does nothing but tell your competitors which keywords you're targeting for SEO.

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