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  #1  
Old 01-20-11, 02:59 PM
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Is this feeling...doom?

I started my Adderall exactly a week ago today. My doctor prescribed me three 20mg a day, but I took it upon myself to take less (There's no way I need that much). I've been on Adderall for the past 8 years on and off, but it was usually XR. This time I'm on IR. I've been taking 10mg about ever 3-4 hours until about 5pm, or at least give myself 5-6 hours before I go to bed. Now that you have that information...

All week I've been doing great. Cleaned a kitchen (it took about 9 hours total between 2 days), started calling imaging places about getting an MRI that I need desperately (working out payments), and basically cleaning up messes around the house as I go along. This house is a disaster from years of nobody cleaning it...

Anyway, my SO woke me up a little early this morning. I slept about 5-6 hours total. I just finished my "life story" entry on my blog. It is over 5000 words, and you would think I would feel accomplished or just better about everything after getting it off my chest, but I don't...I just have this weird feeling in the pit of my stomach. I don't know if it's anxiety, or what it is, but it's like I'm scared to accomplish anything. It started after I uploaded the blog. I've taken three 10mg today and I guess I'm too scared to take more because maybe this feeling is from not enough sleep. I don't need to take more if I just need a nap.

Maybe I just need a nap...I don't know...I feel weird.
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Old 01-20-11, 03:33 PM
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Re: Is this feeling...doom?

It sounds like anxiety to me.. when you feel tired, or need a nap, do you get similar feelings? It really could be the IR. I've read some people prefer the XR for this reason. I like the IR myself, but only a specific manufacturer. Who manufactures your IR?

(You could also contact a moderator and request this be moved to the Adderall section. You might get more replies/insight there.)
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Old 01-20-11, 03:50 PM
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Re: Is this feeling...doom?

Do you think it has to do with feeling drained? I think a nap would be a good idea for you. Sometimes meditation helps me. It actually clear my mind.
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Old 01-20-11, 05:18 PM
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Re: Is this feeling...doom?

Well, back when I was writing I would always get nervous right when the magazine came out that I had a piece in. I was always really afraid that I'd get some negative comment or something.

Putting your life story out there for all to see would be much more nerve-wracking, IMHO, as it's not just the writing they're going to be critiquing, but you.

On the other hand, maybe it is bona fide doom, and something really bad is going to happen soon.

Okay, I see that none of this is probably going to make you feel better, but maybe it can be useful in pondering a bit and trying to trace down the root of your feelings?
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Old 01-20-11, 05:38 PM
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Re: Is this feeling...doom?

When I first publish my blog posts I feel both nervous and excited, so I stay away from the computer and then come back a few hours later.

Sometimes on meds even after doing a lot I feel like I should be doing more. Do you get that feeling too?
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Old 01-20-11, 06:45 PM
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Re: Is this feeling...doom?

Quote:
Originally Posted by LaVieEnRose View Post
It sounds like anxiety to me.. when you feel tired, or need a nap, do you get similar feelings? It really could be the IR. I've read some people prefer the XR for this reason. I like the IR myself, but only a specific manufacturer. Who manufactures your IR?

(You could also contact a moderator and request this be moved to the Adderall section. You might get more replies/insight there.)
Yeah, it very well could have been anxiety. And you're right, I should have posted this in the Adderall section. I had that thought after I posted it. I had to buy a partial on my prescription because I needed a prior auth. After the first couple days I was having bad anxiety issues and was researching information about Adderall and ended up here, actually. I found the thread that talked about different manufacturer and the effects it has on different people. I found out I was on PharmCore and there was quite a few negative comments about it. I decided to call around when I got my new prescription and found a couple places that had Barr, and filled it there. I can tell a difference, but I think I've already became tolerant of the dosage I decided on. I'll probably up my dosage tomorrow or in the next couple of days if I still don't feel anything. Also, I may decide on going to a clinical trial group that's in Gainesville because it's free and they are focused on non-stimulants. I think that would benefit me so my anxiety wasn't so bad.

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Originally Posted by anonymouslyadd View Post
Do you think it has to do with feeling drained? I think a nap would be a good idea for you. Sometimes meditation helps me. It actually clear my mind.
Yeah, I'm pretty sure I was just tired...I took a nap, and I feel a little better. I'll just make sure I go to bed earlier this evening.

Quote:
Originally Posted by chartreuse View Post
Well, back when I was writing I would always get nervous right when the magazine came out that I had a piece in. I was always really afraid that I'd get some negative comment or something.

Putting your life story out there for all to see would be much more nerve-wracking, IMHO, as it's not just the writing they're going to be critiquing, but you.

On the other hand, maybe it is bona fide doom, and something really bad is going to happen soon.

Okay, I see that none of this is probably going to make you feel better, but maybe it can be useful in pondering a bit and trying to trace down the root of your feelings?
Lmao. You made me laugh, at least. Hehe. One thing that did happen that was pretty horribly irritating was before I took my nap I was playing Final Fantasy: Echos of Time on my DS. I didn't realize I had to press A by the save crystal to actually save the game and kept running past them and letting them refill my health...I shut off the game because I thought it was saved and when I turned it back on...I had to start all over. Gr.

But you're right, maybe it is the blog thing...I did erase things quite a bit and couldn't re-read it because it made me anxious. I thought it would help me...


Quote:
Originally Posted by fracturedstory View Post
When I first publish my blog posts I feel both nervous and excited, so I stay away from the computer and then come back a few hours later.

Sometimes on meds even after doing a lot I feel like I should be doing more. Do you get that feeling too?
All the freaking time, man. Like today, I've gotten a hold of the imaging place that's going to do my MRI to schedule my appointment and make sure I could afford it, and I keep playing phone tag with the guy at the workforce that's head of the digital access program I'm trying to get into. I need to find out if the program will even remotely give me some kind of hope of a job I would enjoy and stay with. I've been in and out of jobs for the last 3 years, and my parents won't stop getting on me about it. My mom doesn't understand why I'm not applying EVERYWHERE, but I know it's because I don't want to get a job just to lose it... TOT, I know...But yeah.





I think I'll feel better tomorrow. Thanks for all of your replies and concerns. If I'm still having problems, I'll probably head over to the Adderall forum and see if I can get some ideas on what course of action I should take.
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Old 01-20-11, 07:53 PM
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Re: Is this feeling...doom?

Thanks mod, for moving my post. You guys are awesome. <3
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Old 01-20-11, 11:44 PM
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Re: Is this feeling...doom?

Quote:
Originally Posted by fletcherface View Post
I had to buy a partial on my prescription because I needed a prior auth. After the first couple days I was having bad anxiety issues and was researching information about Adderall and ended up here, actually. I found the thread that talked about different manufacturer and the effects it has on different people. I found out I was on PharmCore and there was quite a few negative comments about it. I decided to call around when I got my new prescription and found a couple places that had Barr, and filled it there. I can tell a difference, but I think I've already became tolerant of the dosage I decided on. I'll probably up my dosage tomorrow or in the next couple of days if I still don't feel anything. Also, I may decide on going to a clinical trial group that's in Gainesville because it's free and they are focused on non-stimulants. I think that would benefit me so my anxiety wasn't so bad.
Hello again. We found this place the same way! I was diagnosed, started taking Adderall and then started researching like crazy and voila! This place ROCKS! Welcome! You're going to love it.

I'll just put in my 2 cents, even though everyone's experiences with the various manufacturers are different. I was first on Corepharma and it was bad! I mean, it was harsh. Then I got Barr, and I felt nothing. Nada. Even at a MUCH higher dose (with my doctor's permission of course). It was really unbelievable.. the two *for me* are like night and day.

If it ends up being good for you at the right dose, that's great! If not, I kept reading here how people praised Sandoz, and got some of that. It's the best by farrrrr (in my opinion ). In any case, best of good luck to you!
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Old 01-21-11, 01:01 AM
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Re: Is this feeling...doom?

Quote:
Originally Posted by LaVieEnRose View Post
If it ends up being good for you at the right dose, that's great! If not, I kept reading here how people praised Sandoz, and got some of that. It's the best by farrrrr (in my opinion ). In any case, best of good luck to you!
Yeah...It is kind of night and day between these two. I'll just keep tweaking my dosage and see what happens. I can go up to three 20mg a day, and I'm at half right now a day. I really need to find some income before anything, 2 months from now seems like a life time away...I wish I could just take the rest of my script in and switch them out for a different manufacturer, but like that could happen. =|


The other thing I'm thinking about testing is my pH level. I found some pH testing strips in my SO's mother's bathroom, but first I don't know how old they are, so I don't know how accurate they will be. I tested a few of them on different things I knew a close estimate of what the pH level would be. Bleach was super purple/blue (which is accurate), our tap water (which is well water) and that was pretty close to neutral (also accurate), our bottled water was a little on the acid side, maybe a 6-6.5 or so, and crystal light...well, that stuff is extremely acidic. I will not be drinking it from now on. Which kind of makes me sad because it's what I drink from the time I wake up until bed time...I've been doing some research and the general consensus is that acidic food/drink doesn't make things better to say the least.

So, I'm probably going to pick up some pH testing strips in the next day or so. Mainly because I'm still not certain if the ones I found are accurate. After I get them, my plan is to keep a journal of the pH level of my body vs. the effect the Adderall is producing. Also, I'm going to keep track of what I eat. I know it sounds like a lot of work, but if I can get the levels worked out for me, it would help me in the long run.
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Old 01-21-11, 01:07 AM
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Re: Is this feeling...doom?

Join a religion. They are great on doom and punishment.
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Old 01-21-11, 01:09 AM
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Re: Is this feeling...doom?

Thank you for the post. It really isn't doom to be on medication.
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Old 01-22-11, 09:36 PM
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Re: Is this feeling...doom?

Of course not! Just unfortunately I'm having a different reaction this time to it than I did the last times over the past 8 years...

I posted more about my Adderall experience this time around in my blog. The gist of it: I'll be seeing that clinical trial group in Gainesville. I'm calling them Monday. I guess Adderall's not helping me this time. People change over time, so I'm sure it has a lot to do with my anxiety that's developed over the past couple years. It's not super bad, but I'll have a panic attack out of nowhere at least 4 times a month. I wish I could get XR again; maybe that would be a difference (that's what I had been on most of the time before), but if IR is giving me this much of a problem, I don't see the point in continuing with it. I'd rather find something that works for me instead of increasing my dose further and further.

Monday. I'm calling that place. We'll see from there.
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Old 01-22-11, 09:56 PM
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Re: Is this feeling...doom?

Well, I will say that when I don't get enough sleep and I take adderall, I feel crappy and anxious. I feel jittery, kind of ill, agitated, and just not good at all. So lack of sleep can affect it.
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Old 01-23-11, 01:14 AM
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Re: Is this feeling...doom?

Yeah, I think I'm going to take a break from it tomorrow and Monday. I don't think I'm getting enough sleep at night (7-8 hours max), and I have sleep apnea, so I'm getting even less sleep than I really am...
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Old 01-23-11, 01:36 AM
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Re: Is this feeling...doom?

{{hugs}} Best of luck fletcherface! Please keep us posted on how you're doing.
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